Escaping
by Gemmi92
Summary: She thought that she had escaped the First Order when she joined the Resistance and fell for their best pilot. Little did she know there was no escaping the First Order. Poe/OC
1. Chapter 1

"And how do the new recruits fare?"

Looking up from the X-Wing he stood beside, he placed a hand on the side of the fighter jet and quirked a brow, looking to the General as she approached him. She wore a simple green pantsuit with her long hair tied on top of her head. She dressed exactly like the others in the Resistance, but the way she held herself was that of nobility. Of course, he knew exactly who she was and her history, as did everyone on the planet where they had made their home.

"Well enough," the pilot responded to General Organa. "They can keep up with my pace and they seem to have a good eye for shooting, but some of them struggled. No doubt they will need some extra training, but I'd be happy to help them if I can."

"Glad to hear it," the replied to him. "However, that might have to wait for a while. I happen to have a mission for you."

"A mission?" Poe wondered from her, his hands dropping to his hips over the orange jumpsuit he wore. "What kind of mission?"

"One that we can discuss later on," Leia informed him, sensing that he was growing impatient and she didn't pretend not to know why. It was written all over his face. "I suspect there is someone who is waiting for your return first?"

Chuckling, the pilot nodded his head and looked to the ground, a smile forming on his lips at the mere thought of returning to see her. He had done his best to keep their brewing romance a secret, but the General was not blind. She had seen the way he looked at the young teacher from D'Qar. Ever since he had laid eyes on her he had been unable to forget her.

"Rosella has been to me a couple of times in the past week," Leia confided in him. "She asked me when you would return. No doubt she has almost finished teaching by now."

"Then I shall report to you this evening?" Poe checked and Leia chuckled, shaking her head back and forth as she watched Dameron with intrigue.

"No," she said. "Take the evening off, Dameron. You will be back on duty tomorrow morning and we shall discuss your mission then. A night shall make no difference to it."

"Thank you, General," he nodded, grateful for one night off as the woman moved away from him.

A whirling noise from the ground dragged him from his thoughts as he bent his head down again to look at the little unit.

"You recharge here for the night, BB-8," he declared, patting the spherical droid near his antenna before he dared to stand up again. "Besides, I doubt you want to be with us this evening."

BB-8 let out a low whirl and the pilot laughed at his sarcastic tone before whistling lowly to himself and moving off from the hanger, getting claps on the back and calls of thanks for his help as he went. He returned them all with the usual easy stare and smile, occasionally throwing in the odd wink as he wandered off from them.

He still wore his pilots uniform, but he didn't bother to go and change before he wandered through the Resistance base, knowing exactly where he was heading off to. He came to the hangers exit and looked over to the field of grass before the forest, noting the outhouse there which looked as though it was in the middle of having a new glass window fitted to it. Two mechanics stood there, holding the pane as a woman stood behind them, her hands holding her opposite arms as she watched the glass be lifted in.

Gaggles of children moved by Poe as he brushed past them, occasionally speaking an odd hello to those who dared to greet him. Some cockily said how they admired him, whilst others remained silent, gaping in awe at the sight of the Resistance's best pilot. He would have chuckled at them had they not look so awestruck. He finished walking through the crowd of children as they made their way back to the base, no doubt in search of their parents and families for the evening.

"And how did it break, Rosella?" one of the mechanics asked the woman stood on the grass as she rolled her eyes and drummed her fingers against her skin.

"You know what children are like," the woman responded, her voice light and carefree as she brushed off the incident. "They were seeing how far they could throw rocks and it seems Manden has a stronger throw than anyone else in the class."

The two men chuckled before quickly fitting the glass. They fitted Resistance jets, a small piece of glass was no problem for them. They were doing in a matter of seconds, brushing their hands together and stepping back to admire their handiwork.

"That better, Rose?" one of them asked and she nodded, patting his upper arm, all of them oblivious to the pilot behind them.

"Much better," Rosella nodded. "No doubt I will be calling you back out here when they break something else."

"We'll give it a day," the other man said jokingly, turning on his heel with the toolkit in his fingertips, only to freeze at the sight of the pilot behind them.

Placing a hand to his chest, he laughed lowly as the others turned around.

"You scared me to death, Dameron," the mechanic declared and the pilot gave him a lopsided grin.

"Clearly not," Dameron responded in a drawl, "because you're still breathing."

"Cocky git," the mechanic mumbled as Dameron slowly turned his eyes from them and finally met the gaze of Rosella.

She struggled to keep her smile slim on her face as a hand moved to her hair, anxiously tucking it behind her ear as she kept her gaze on the pilot before her. He continued to watch her too, his eyes narrowed slightly as he observed her, checking that she was still the same Rosella he had left last week.

The two mechanics coughed awkwardly before walking away.

"We'll leave you two to it," they mumbled before clapping Poe on the shoulder and moving over the grass field towards the base as the pilot and teacher remained still.

"When did you get back?" Rosella was the one to ask as Poe advanced towards her and she remained still, allowing the pilot to wrap his arms around her waist, his hands splaying in the small of her back as he pushed her front against his, her hands having no option but to find his shoulders.

"Less than half an hour ago," Poe informed her. "The General told me that a woman had constantly been in the control room asking after me. I had no idea I was so sorely missed or desirable."

Scoffing at hearing him, she rolled her eyes and hit his shoulder lightly, avoiding his gaze as she looked at any available space of skin that she could see, making sure that he was not injured from the training exercise.

"Don't flatter yourself, Dameron," she warned him and he chuckled, his hands moving up her back to tangle into her unruly shoulder length blonde hair.

"I was just speaking the truth," he replied and that earned him a roll of the eyes. "Besides, Rose, you're not the only one who was missing someone."

"No?" she teased him.

"No," he repeated. "Because there's this teacher, you see, and ever since the best pilot in the Resistance met her, he's struggled to get her out of his head. Even when he's supposed to be thinking of nothing but the Resistance."

"Well, he sounds positively infatuated," Rosella responded and he nodded his head in agreement.

"Certainly so," he agreed with her. "But she's just as infatuated as he is."

Another roll of her eyes earned her a sharp jab in the side as she laughed at the motion and Dameron moved a hand towards her chin, tilting her gaze up to meet his. It was then when the smile disappeared from her face and she sighed, her hand moving to cup his cheek tenderly as her fingers tangled into his thick black hair.

"I was worried," she finally admitted to him, any trace of joking leaving her tone. "Your training missions are becoming longer and longer, Poe. A week…"

"Hey," Poe spoke, trying to soothe her slightly. "A week has gone by quickly. Look, I'm back now."

"But for how long?" she wondered back.

Poe bit down on his tongue then, unsure of how to tell her that he was leaving again in the next week, no doubt it could be sooner than that once he received his mission. Keeping quiet, Poe struggled to look her in the eye as he rested his cheek on the top of her head and she pressed hers against his shoulder.

"The General told me she has a mission for me," Poe declared and Rosella took a deep breath, as Poe felt the motion against his shoulder. "I have to report to her in the morning, but for now I'm back and we have tonight. Let's not argue about it tonight."

Rosella struggled to ignore him when he pleaded with her and so, for once, she didn't push the subject.

….

"It's amazing that they give you your own quarters," Rosella informed Poe as she sat on his bed cross-legged. She watched as Poe finished pushing a hand through his damp hair that he had just watched. The pants on his hips hung low whilst the shirt he wore was unbuttoned to his chest.

"Well, the best pilot in the Resistance does have some perks," Poe shrugged at her. "Do you remember when I picked you out of the dorms?"

"Oh, is that what happened?" Rosella asked from him. "I was the girl lucky enough to be plucked from the dorms to share the bed of the best pilot in the Resistance?"

Poe chuckled then and dropped the towel he had been using on the floor beside him, letting it stay there as he moved to his bed and sat against the headboard, lifting on leg up to bend at the knee as he looped his arms around it.

"Trust me, many other girls would die to be in your position," Poe joked with her.

"Don't I know it," she said back to him.

"Luckily I only have eyes for one now," Poe replied.

"You know how to make me cringe, Poe," Rosella said, adjusting the long sleeping shirt she wore over her body as Poe laughed heartedly and moved a hand to his chest, faking injury.

"You wound me," Poe responded to her.

"Oh, I doubt it," Rosella promised him. "Anyway, how was the training mission? You haven't said anything about it since you got back."

Shrugging, Poe looked to the ceiling of the plain white room before noticing how Rosella was pushing the duvet to his single bed back that they were both struggling to sit on together. She crawled under the duvet, resting her damp head of hair in Poe's lap as he remained sat up.

"Good," Poe informed her. "A lot of the newbies have potential. They just need to be trained how to shoot and fly at the same time. Most of them seem to only be able to focus on one thing, not that I can blame them. A lot of them haven't flown their own jet in a battle before."

"And do you think it will come to that? A battle?" she asked from him, closing her eyes as she moved a hand to Poe's gripping it tightly inside of hers.

"I do not know," Poe admitted. "The First Order are stepping up their efforts so we have to step up ours."

"And then what? You both keep stepping up efforts…I…when will it just become a war? That is what they want, isn't it?"

"No, what they want is complete loyalty," Poe replied, his hand squeezing hers. "But no one will give it to them, let alone us."

"So by refusing there is bound to be a war?" Rosella checked with the pilot. "I may just be a teacher, Poe, but I know how the world works. I remember learning about the Republic…all of it."

"Hey," Poe tried to soothe her as he sensed her tone growing with anxiousness. "It hasn't come to that yet, Rose. If it does come to that then we will deal with it together, just as we have done everything else since you came here."

Taking a shaky breath, she closed her eyes and shook her head slowly, wondering exactly what would happen when that time came. It took her a moment to open her eyes, letting them roll back slightly so she could look to the pilot who sat above her.

"You're not helpless," Rosella informed him. "I'm just a teacher, Poe-"

"-A teacher who takes kid's minds from what is happening," Poe interrupted her. "You look after them and help them to forget the First Order…the Resistance…you help them just to be kids, Rosella. That's a pretty big order."

"Don't try to make me feel better," Rosella complained to him, moving to sit up as she placed her legs either side of Poe's waist, letting herself settle in his lap as she placed her hands on his shoulders and the pilot gave her a sincere smile that he only saved for her.

"I'm not, I'm telling you the truth," he assured her. "When you came here, Rosella…when you told us how you had got here…we were in awe of you-"

"-No," she shook her head, looking down and away from Poe's gaze as she went back to that memory and recalled everything that she had done. "I did nothing brave, Poe. If I was brave then I would have left months before…I would have escaped before…I would have saved those children…"

"You couldn't go against the entire First Order, Rose," Poe said, dragging her gaze back to his as he moved his head downwards, his forehead resting against hers as his hand gripped her waist. "You couldn't save every child from their grips."

"You don't understand," she balled her hand into a fist and allowed it to rest on Poe's chest as her head shook back and forth. "I taught their children…yes…they were children of First Order captains…lieutenants…generals…but they were still children and I let them be taken when they were old enough to train how to fight. I should have done more…their screams…I can hear them…they were still young…so young…"

Poe managed to draw her out of the incoherent sentences she was speaking, recalling how she would often wake up murmuring the same sentences. Moving his hands up her sides to cup her cheeks, he took hold of her in his hands, letting his gaze move to hers and whispering the only words he knew that could bring her out of the daze she was in.

"Come back to me, Rose," he whispered. "Come back to me."

He saw her eyes stop clouding over as she wrapped her arms around his neck, scrambling against his hold as he held her back and took a deep breath, wondering just how long the First Order would keep her in their clutches.

…..

A/N: So I already have a Kylo/OC story, but I could not resist a Poe/OC story. Do let me know your thoughts!


	2. Chapter 2

Poe was in that middle ground between dreaming and waking up. It was that moment where you could control how you dreamed, but you knew that you were on the verge of reality, regardless of how much you begged for it not to be true. His eyes were closed tightly, scrunched up as he longed for the dream to continue, but that was not going to happen, especially so once he heard the nightmares begin again.

Opening his eyes, Poe couldn't even roll over on the small bed, knowing that there was no room for movement as he pushed himself onto his elbows, reaching to tap the light on his bedside table and illuminate the room. The light shone in his eyes and he blinked profusely, looking to the blonde next to him as she rested on her side, muttering incoherently in her sleep.

Moving his hand to her shoulder, Poe shook her small body as the covers dropped from her shoulders and her sleeping shirt fell down her slender shoulder, revealing the scar that sat there. Moving his thumb over it, Poe felt how it was cooler than the rest of her body as he continued to shake her.

"Rosella," he whispered, wondering just how many times he had done this since she agreed to share his bed.

The first time she had shared his bed and had the nightmares had been worrying. She had told him that she would return to her dorm and sleep there, not wanting to bother him. But Poe had grabbed her wrist and stopped her from going anywhere. He had asked her to tell him what they were about, but she had refused. She had only opened up a month later, telling him the full extent of her time at the First Order. She had told him things that she had even kept hidden from Leia out of fear.

"Rose," Poe tried again. "Rose, come back to me, come back to my voice."

It took a few more attempts before she groggily opened her eyes, the light clearly blinding her as she reached upwards for Poe, her arms wrapping around his bare neck as his hands found her waist to cradle.

"Okay?" Poe asked her that simple word as she bent into his body.

"I am now," she assured him, wondering when the nightmares would end.

"Good," Poe said, his hand moving to take hold of her by the cheek. "Try to go back to sleep. It's still late. I'll be here, Rose."

Nodding in agreement, Rosella settled back down on the mattress, closing her eyes and allowing sleep to try to come and find her again. Poe watched her for a few moments before turning the light out and letting her sleep.

….

At first it had been shocking to see Poe Dameron enter the dining hall with a woman by his side. Everyone had whispered and gossiped about how the two of them had even grown close. And then there had been the inevitable talk of the two of them spending the night together.

But now everyone saw it as the norm when Poe and Rosella walked in together. They never had their hands holding or their arms entwined, clearly not wanting to draw attention to themselves. But she would often look up at something that Poe was saying, and the pilot would always carry their meals on the same tray. They would sit themselves in the corner of the room at the end of a metal bench, both of them next to each other and not across from each so that they could talk without yelling across the table.

"When do you go to meet with the General?" Rosella asked as she tore some of the bread from the ball of dough on the tray as Poe held his cup of water in his hand, leaning forwards and swirling the liquid in the cup.

"This morning," Poe responded to her. "I don't know when I'll be going on the mission, but I'll come and find you before I go."

"Do," Rosella declared and continued to eat as Poe did the same, the two of them engaging over trivial conversation as they ate their breakfast.

Poe took the tray away once they had finished before moving into the corridors of the base. He said goodbye to Rosella with a quick peck to the check, his hand on the small of her back as his lips quickly brushed her skin and he left her to go off to the classroom away from the base.

The doors to the control room entered before Poe and he stepped inside, looking around at the hive of activity as he went in. He noted the General stood by the wall of screens that showed the different planets neighbouring them. All was peaceful at that moment in time, but Poe knew how that could change in a matter of seconds.

"Dameron," Leia spoke once she turned around and saw him moving towards her. "I trust you had a good night?"

"Good enough," Poe remained elusive, not entirely wanting to discuss his personal business with the General. There were things that Rosella had told him in confidence and he didn't wish to betray that. He wanted to keep something that was his, not something that was the knowledge of the entire base.

"Well, I hate to have to do this to you, Poe," Leia spoke and nodded to him. "But, I am going to have to ask you to leave again on a mission that is personal to me."

Furrowing his brows, the pilot looked intrigued at hearing that from the General. Nodding his head, he followed her as she led him to a private corner of the control room and she looked around, making sure that no one was listening in to their conversation.

"It's a mission that I don't want broadcast in the ranks," Leia told him. "But you know I have a brother, Luke."

"I've heard stories," Poe admitted and Leia nodded.

"Well most of them are correct," she assured Poe. "But my brother has gone missing and I need you to find him. I fear that he is the only one powerful enough to help us stop the First Order."

"But he's gone missing?" Poe checked and she once again nodded to him.

"I need you to find Lor San Tekka," Leia said. "My brother was apparently seen by him and he is the last person to have noted his whereabouts. Apparently he is somewhere in the Hevurion Grace. I need you to assemble a team of pilots who you trust along with a translator to go with you. No doubt you will need someone who speaks the language of different species."

"How many pilots should I take?" Poe enquired from her.

"I'd say three or four," Leia replied. "Of course, finding a translator may be difficult. I need to keep Marna and Berra with me in the control room should we need to establish contact with anyone. I did hear that Rosella-"

"-Out of the question," Poe shook his head with haste, not even giving Leia the chance to speak anything else. He stood tall then, his chin jutted out as he refused to apologise for his outburst and interruption. There was absolutely no way he was going to drag Rosella on a mission with him.

"Does she or does she not speak fluently in other languages?" Leia asked, her brow arched on her forehead.

"Yes," Poe admitted, but he kept silent then. Leia only knew the basics. She had no idea how she woke up, screaming about the First Order. She had no idea what they had subjected her to. Leia only saw her as a First Order traitor.

"Poe," Leia took a deep breath, "I know how close you are to her, but she was a member of the First Order. How well do you trust her?"

"Well enough," Poe promised the General. "She is not a First Order spy and if she were why would you ask me to take her on a mission?"

"I do not for one second believe that she is a First Order spy," Leia blinked profusely and brushed off the pilot's accusation. "But I do believe that she could be a useful asset to us when the time comes for us to go against them. She knows their ways and how they work."

"Then it can come to that at a later date," Poe nodded sternly. "Rosella is not joining me on the mission. I will find another translator if I have to."

"Then you do that," Leia said, knowing full well that arguing with Poe was a waste of her time. He did as he pleased and consequences be damned, especially when it came to his feelings. "I want to see you flying out of here tomorrow morning. Understood?"

"Understood."

…

"If it is top secret then should you be telling me?"

Rosella asked the perfectly adequate question as she tided up the small classroom once the day had ended. Moving around the room, she picked the books up from the desk, balancing them in her arms as Poe sat on the edge of a desk, his leather jacket hanging from his frame as he folded his arms over his chest and shrugged nonchalantly.

"Probably not," Poe said, "but I told BB-8 and he's more of a gossip than you so I'll take my chances."

Laughing, Rosella's hair fell into her face as she took hold of another book. "That is true."

"So, the General wants me to go and find her brother, Luke Skywalker," Poe said and Rosella turned to look at him, her eyes widening as she struggled to believe that. "I know, apparently he went missing."

"He went into hiding once Kylo Ren killed all of the padawan he was training," Rosella answered, recalling that piece of information from the First Order. "I don't think he could live with the guilt…children he was supposed to protect being slaughtered…"

Trailing off, Rosella placed the books on her desk at the front as Poe stood up and moved to take hold of her waist, dragging her away from the dark thoughts she was no doubt entering. It worked as her eyes snapped back up to him, her hands limp on his chest as she gave him a steady smile.

"Anyway," he continued, "she asked me to assemble a team of four pilots to find a man called Lor San Tekka. Apparently he was the last person to see Luke."

"No doubt you picked Oddy?" Rosella guessed and Poe nodded. "Oh, and Temmin? And probably Jessika?"

"You are good," Poe mumbled, his forehead brushing against hers as his hair tickled her skin and she patted his chest, trying to guess the last person.

"Oh, and Kare?" she finished and Poe kissed her chastely.

"Got it in one," he informed her, his hot breath tickling against her lips before she closed the gap and kissed him again.

"It was hardly difficult," Rosella commented. "You only talk about the same four pilots who are worth your attention. Besides, Temmin would kill you if you didn't pick him."

Chuckling, Poe reluctantly allowed Rosella out of his grip as she moved to take hold of the books and file them in the shelf on the opposite wall, checking that they were going in the right slot as she placed them in. Poe folded his arms back over his chest and wandered around the room, looking to the floor as he considered telling her what Leia had also said.

"The General also wants me to take a translator," Poe declared.

"Oh, did you pick Marna from the control room? She is very good. I remember my Ithorese was rusty when I got here and she helped me brush up on it."

"Apparently Marna is needed in the control room, but she did suggest someone else."

"Yes?"

"Mmhm," Poe mumbled as Rosella stood up again and turned to look at him, waiting to hear who had been suggested. "You."

It took a moment for that to sink in, but Rosella didn't go into a state of denial straight away. Instead she seemed to frown and narrow her eyes, almost as though her brain was working overtime to try and process that information. Shrugging her shoulders, she didn't seem as worried as Poe would have thought.

"I guess that makes sense," Rosella said. "She knows that I am fluent and have spent years practicing."

"What?" Poe snapped out. "Rose, I told her no straight away."

"Pity," Rosella replied, shrugging again before moving to tuck chairs underneath desks. "I could have come with you instead of being left here."

"You're safer here," Poe told her. "You're safe here where the First Order cannot get you. Coming with me carries risk, Rosella."

"Risk which only you are allowed to take?" Rosella wondered. "Do you ever think about what I might do if you didn't return, Poe? Do you ever think about that? I…I've lost so much already and losing you…the one man I actually have ever cared for…I think that would break me. So excuse me if I was considering it."

Poe sighed, knowing full well how she felt. He would have felt the same way if he had been told that she was going of on a mission. He would have gone with her to keep her safe.

"I cannot bring you with me," Poe declared, moving to take hold of her shoulders as she seemed to do her best to avoid his gaze. "Rose, the First Order will be looking for San Tekka, just like we are. If they got you…took you back…hurt you anymore than they have done, then I would never forgive myself."

"And if they take you then I will never forgive myself," Rosella whispered to him, finally looking him in the eye. "I know what they do, Poe."

"I know you do," Poe promised her. "But you are safe here. Give me a week and I will be back before you know it."

"Until the next mission," Rosella grumbled and Poe struggled to console her on that point.

"Look, I have had the communication fixed in my X-Wing. I will leave you the number to its communications centre and you can just dial it whenever you need me. If you need to talk…or if I just need to hear your voice…"

"Promise?" Rosella checked with him and he nodded, tucking her hair behind her ear and kissing her softly on the forehead.

"Promise," he told her.

...

A/N: So we will soon discover more out about Rosella and Poe's past along with some action! Let me know what you think


	3. Chapter 3

It had always been difficult to escape Poe's gaze, especially when he was always watching her. It was the same whenever he went on a mission. The night before he would sit by her side on the small bed, keeping her wrapped in his grip, his hand continuously running up and down her cheek, almost as though he was trying to memorise her features. Rosella would always cling back onto him, wondering what he was going to see.

But this time would be different.

She would see to that.

Moving out of Poe's sleeping quarters as the pilot showered, Rosella headed towards the control room of the base. She was dressed in her black pantsuit, the top few buttons of it undone as she tucked her hair behind her ear and sought of the General.

She received a few stares once she entered the control room, only to ignore them and note the General sat in the corner of the room, looking confused and forlorn. Frowning, Rosella wondered what plagued the woman's thoughts. She looked troubled and lost.

"General," Rosella finally spoke her name once she was stood above her. She let her voice sound more confident than it really was as she met the General's gaze.

"Rosella," the General almost looked shocked at who had addressed, but her shock soon turned to a smile as she held a hand out to the chair near hers at the small table littered in papers. "Take a seat."

Nodding, Rosella settled down, sucking in a breath as she considered what she was about to ask. Rosella knew full well that Poe would kill her when he found out. He might get to her before the First Order anyway.

"How can I help you?" the General enquired from her and Rosella nodded, forcing herself to do this. She had to do this for Poe. She needed him to see that she could help and she was not useless.

"Poe told me of his mission." Rosella said and Leia frowned before arching her brows and leaning back in her seat, forgetting her posture as she moved a hand to her chin.

"Of course he did, even though I told him it was classified," Leia declared. "I should have known that he would not keep anything from you."

"Well, he told me that you needed a translator," Rosella declared. "And then he told me how you had mentioned my name."

"Did he tell you how he shot that idea down straight away" Leia asked her back. "He told me not to think of you, yet I do not think he has found anyone to go along with him and translate."

"That is why I am asking you to send me."

She realised there was no way back now. She had well and truly put herself forward and backtracking now would only make her look foolish and weak. The two things she refused to be. The First Order had made her that, but she wanted the feeling of standing on her own two feet. She wanted to defeat them more she cared to admit.

Leia clearly looked shocked as her mouth gaped. She didn't even try to hide it as she watched the young woman across from her. But she didn't shake her head in disagreement with what was being asked.

"And does Dameron know?"

"He has no idea," Rosella admitted. "I snuck away while he was busy. I…he's protective…"

"And he would not be best pleased to learn of you being here," Leia concluded.

"With all due respect, General, it is not his decision," Rosella suddenly felt braver than she felt as she clasped her hands on the table and leaned closer to Leia. "I am a good translator. I'm a little rusty, but I'm good. I have enough knowledge of all the Systems to see us through safely. Poe can fly a fighter jet better than anyone, but he doesn't know how to ask for what he wants. I can help him and the others. You know that I can."

"I do not deny that," Leia promised her. "And can you fly? That is another question, Rosella. X-Wings carry a pilot and a droid, nothing else."

"I…" Rosella trailed off, thinking back to her days in the First Order before she shrugged. "I learned how to fly when…back…"

She struggled to keep her eyes open as she thought back to her time as a teenager. Her father had taught her to fly before all of this mess had happened. He had been a skilled pilot for the Empire during his time there. He had helped to teach Rosella to fly when she had been old enough. She had always struggled, but she had a feeling she could remember the basics.

"You learned with the Order?" Leia asked from her and she shook her head.

"No, after the Empire fell," Rosella admitted and Leia blinked with wonder as to the girl's history. She was certainly full of surprises. "I learned before the First Order truly rose to power. I might be a bit rusty, but I can fly. I might just need half an hour to get to grips with the controls."

"This isn't a mission for rusty pilots," Leia responded. "Rosella, I have no doubt in your ability to interpret-"

"-I have to go," Rosella declared, interrupting Leia and forgetting her rank. "I have to go with him. I need to help. I…as much as this is about going and staying with him…I need to do this for myself. I need to help. I have done so much that I regret and I need to do this to do the right thing for once. Poe might have the best pilots, but they are useless if they can't find anything out. You have to know that."

Leia seemed thoughtful after the girl's outburst. All she could do was sit there, her fingers drumming on the table as she considered what she was being asked to do.

"I don't know what really happened to you during your time with the First Order," Leia spoke, "but I know that Poe has the upmost trust in you."

"I would never betray the Resistance," Rosella assured Leia. "I ran away from the First Order to the Resistance. I want to help."

"I can see," Leia said in a drawl, trailing off and leaving Rosella to sit there, pondering exactly what she was going to say. "If you go with them then you need to inform Poe. I have already suffered his wrath. The pilots leave at dawn before anyone awakens. Be in the hanger."

Nodding in agreement, Rosella said nothing else. She moved to her feet, shaking slightly and wandering back down the corridors until she came to Poe's quarters, her eyes closing before she opened the door and wondered exactly what she was going to say to him.

"Damn it, Rosella, I wondered where you had gotten to," Poe snapped at her once she had walked into the bedroom to see him sat there, placing his shirt onto his body, his hair dripping and leaving droplets of water on the material before he fastened it up and reached for the towel to drape over his shoulders.

"Sorry," Rosella said, closing the door behind her. "But I went to see General Organa."

"Why?" Poe dared to ask from her.

"I'm coming with you tomorrow."

She said the statement with the upmost amount of confidence she could muster before she moved to the bathroom door, having no intention of remaining stood there and watching Poe's gawping at her. She didn't make it too far as Poe's hand wrapped around her forearm and he stopped her from moving, turning her to face him.

"You're joking?" he checked with her. "This is some kind of joke, right?"

"No," Rosella replied, standing tall to look at him with as much seriousness as she had inside of her. "You need a translator and I can translate. I will get Morna to watch the classroom for a week until I get back. But I am coming with you, Poe."

"What were you thinking?" Poe demanded, letting her go as if he was too hurt to touch her. "Do you not understand how dangerous it is out there?"

"Drop it," Rosella hissed at him and Poe looked shocked at hearing her snap at him. "Do you think I am so weak and pathetic? I can handle myself, Dameron. I handled myself before I met you and I can handle myself now. I don't need you smothering me."

"Is that what you think I'm doing?" Poe demanded back from her. "You think I smother you when I wake you from your nightmares? Or beg for you not to go to that dark place in your mind?"

"I never said that," Rosella retorted, sensing that an argument was brewing as she shook her head. "But I know that you are smothering me now by telling me what I can and cannot do. I need to be the person I was before the First Order. I was better than this…not a snivelling wreck…"

"Rosella, you have been through enough at the hands of the First Order," Poe reminded her.

"And I don't want to let them break me," Rosella retorted. "I want to help you stop them and I want to do this. Don't stop me, Poe."

"Clearly nothing can stop you," Poe replied, his tone bitter as Rosella shook her head and grabbed her toiletry bag from the simple white dresser in Poe's room. "You have your own mind."

"I do," Rosella agreed, ignoring his smarmy tone as he watched her with his narrowed brown eyes. "And I am coming so is that the end of this conversation?"

"I'll let you decide," Poe held his hands up and Rosella knew that he was being defensive as he tossed his towel to the side, grabbing his leather jacket as she held her toiletry bag and stood by the bathroom, ready to lock herself in there for a few minutes. "Clearly you make all the shots round here without consulting me."

"I knew you would try to stop me," Rosella informed him.

"Is there any reason?" Poe responded. "I don't want to see you hurt, Rosella. The First Order will be looking for Luke and you might have just put yourself right in their path."

"We will deal with that if it comes to it," Rosella responded.

"Whatever," Poe declared, shrugging his jacket on his shoulders. "I'm going for a walk."

"Poe," Rosella called after him, dropping her bag to the floor and following him to the door, failing to grab his arm as he slammed the door behind him and left her alone in the silent room.

Poe wandered the base until he came to his X-Wing. He climbed the steps into the jet and sat in the cockpit. His hands moved to the controls and he took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He used to sit in his mother's jet when he was a little boy and he felt upset. Whether or not it was because he had argued with his parents or another kid had upset him; the jet had always been a place of safety for him.

It was the only place he felt in control. It was the only place where he was the one calling the shots. But he knew deep down that he could not control Rosella. She was not his jet. She was…well…he didn't know what she was to him, but she was not someone he could control, no matter how much he wanted to.

"Dameron?"

Poe startled as he heard the feminine voice call down from the ground. Looking down, Poe saw the familiar figure of Jessika Pava stood there, dressed in a simple green pantsuit as she rested against the steps leading up to his jet.

"Pava," Dameron greeted her back.

"What you doing in here so late?" she wondered from him and Poe shrugged.

"Thinking, what about you?" Dameron wondered and Pava nodded back to him.

"Same," she replied. "I find it difficult to sleep before a mission. I know the mechanics check the fighters, but I like to do my own check before I go too. Anyway, I hear we have a new addition to the squadron tomorrow."

Poe clenched his teeth together. "News travels fast, huh? You probably knew before I did."

Pava frowned, her hand raking through her black hair as she noted Dameron climb from the X-Wing, resting on the side of it as his feet remained planted on the top step of the staircase.

"The General was in the control room and she told me," Pava said. "You're not happy?"

"About her coming and risking her life with us?" Poe asked, wondering if Pava was joking with him. "I'm ecstatic."

"Sorry," Pava said, although her tone suggested that she was the opposite of sorry. "But we all know you're involved with her, Dameron. Look, apparently she's a good translator."

"With a history with the First Order," Poe said, looking to the ceiling of the hanger. "If they find her-"

"-If they find any of us then we're done for," Pava interrupted him. "Look, I know she has history with the Order. We all know. Granted, we don't know what that history is, but it looks to me as though she is trying to make amends for what she has done if she is offering to help us. Besides, it can't be easy on her…watching you fly away and not knowing if you will come back."

"That's different," Poe replied.

"Not really," Pava said.

"She's not me," Poe responded. "I'm not saying she's weak, but she's not strong, Pava. I wouldn't be strong if I had been through what she had been through."

"So what?" Pava asked him. "You want to keep her locked up in your sleeping quarters until you come back? Make sure no one can get her?"

"If I could then I would," Poe said and Pava laughed then as Poe furrowed his brow at her, wondering what she had found so funny all of a sudden.

"She's a person, Dameron," Pava declared. "If you keep on treating her like this then how will she ever become strong? Keeping her locked away won't help her. Besides, I think she's stronger than you think. The General informed me she was quite forceful."

Groaning, Poe hated it when he was wrong. He especially hated having to admit that he was wrong.

"Look, there's going to be four of us with her," Pava said. "We all look out for each other, right? She'll be fine. Just go and sort this argument out before we leave tomorrow. Tell her you're sorry. I know that's hard for you."

Pava didn't stick around to listen to his cocky response. Instead she just left him alone on the steps of the stairs and wandered off. Poe groaned, his hands moving down his cheeks before he wandered off, knowing that finding Rosella again would make sense.

Thankfully she was still in his room, sat on his bed and dressed in her sleeping shirt, her hair damp around her head as she looked to him. Poe shut the door and locked it before he folded his arms over his chest.

"I should have told you before I went to the General," Rosella declared. "I am sorry for that, but I am not sorry for going."

"You should have told me," Poe informed her and she shrugged.

"Well I didn't," she said. "So if you're still angry with me then I will go back to my dorm and find somewhere to sleep for the evening."

"No," Poe said, stopping her before she could move from the bed.

Poe went to sit on the edge of it, his arms draped over his thighs as he leaned forwards and Rosella wondered what was going through his mind before he spoke again.

"All I want is to keep you safe," Poe said. "I would have locked you away in here too if it meant it. I would have kept you where no one could get you or hurt you or scar you like they have done. But…I know…you have your own mind…your own thoughts…and all that I can do is be there to support you, no matter whether or not I agree with you. I just have to be there."

Rosella was relieved to hear him finally tell her that. He looked to her then and moved his hand to her cheek, letting her take his wrist and move his hand so that she could kiss him on the palm as he watched her.

"Thank you," Rosella whispered to him.

Nodding, Poe went silent and wrapped his arms around her. He didn't know how long had passed before Rosella spoke again, her voice slightly muffled as she rested her cheek against his chest.

"There was a girl," she suddenly spoke. "When I was teaching the children of the First Order there was a girl. She…after her I forgot their names. I forgot that I was teaching children. I tried to look at them as though they were simply stormtroopers in the maker. Some of them wanted that for their future because they didn't know anything else, but there were some who were scared. They saw the white soldiers and they didn't want to become them. The girls…some of them were being raised to be stormtroopers and others were raised to be sold off into a political marriage."

Keeping quiet for a moment, she went back on track. "But Selene was going to be trained to work in the control room when she was old enough. She was clever, you see. Only the clever ones made it to the control room, but the clever ones were also inquisitive. She asked me questions…about the Republic…about the people on the other side. What had they done to deserve their planets being destroyed? Why did they die?"

Poe remained still, almost worried that movement would interrupt her. "I tried to tell her that it was just the way it was, but I never believed that. I…finally I told her more of the Republic. I told her of the Jedi. I told her of Luke Skywalker. I told her the myths and she decided that she wanted to leave the Order. She was fifteen…so young…and she went to her father. She came to me the next day with a bruise on her face. Her father had told her there was nothing but the First Order. Later that day the stormtroopers came and dragged me back to _him."_

She spat out the last word and Poe knew exactly who she was talking about.

"He threatened me never to tell anyone of the Republic again. I asked him why and he…he had men who were particularly good at torture. But he didn't give me to him. I was his. He was going to do his own dirty work when it came to me. He just hit me that time. He slapped me and kept me locked away. By the time I went back to the classroom Selene was nowhere to be seen. She'd been sold of in marriage instead. Apparently the Order couldn't have an idealistic girl in their ranks. A husband was supposed to put her in her place."

Rosella could feel the tears in her eyes now as Poe cradled her tighter against him, his own eyes closing as he considered what she was telling him. She shook her head, looking up to Poe and refusing to let herself cry.

"I need to do this for Selene," Rosella declared. "I need to do this for all of the kids I abandoned…the ones who clung to me…I want to help you bring down the First Order by any means possible."

Poe could say nothing to her, only nod his head and push her head back against his shoulder as he held her tightly and she clung back to him, swearing that she would do anything possible to help Poe.

…..

A/N: Thank you to anyone reading and do let me know what you think!


	4. Chapter 4

"Very fetching."

Rosella would have scolded him for the comment if she wasn't tired. She had barely slept the night before, instead she had lain awake, her head resting on Poe's chest as the pilot slept calmly beneath her, his breathing a soothing melody and the rise and fall of a chest a constant.

"Bright orange," Rosella nodded, looking down at the uniform she was wearing. "Honestly, you want to blend in and you choose bright orange as a uniform?"

"Hey," Poe held his hands up in defence, his toothbrush dangling from the corner of his mouth as he stood against the doorframe and watched Rosella struggle to do something with her hair. "I didn't choose it."

The pilot went back to brushing his teeth as Rosella quit with her hair and left it dangling down her cheeks. It was too short for her to do anything with. She remained still as she sat on Poe's bed, tugging a brush through her locks as the pilot finished off in the bathroom.

"It's not too late," Poe suddenly informed her as he moved into the bedroom, dressed in his pilot's uniform as he noted the flak vest on the bed that Rosella had not yet put on. "You can still stay here."

"I don't think so," Rosella declared, grabbing the vest and staring at it, wondering the best way to put it on and fasten up. "I'm coming with you, Dameron. I'm not letting you go without me this time."

Shrugging, Poe learned to hold his tongue before he took hold of the vest from her and helped her into it, turning her to face him as his hands found the straps at the front and she allowed him to fasten her into it.

"Getting a bit handsy there, Dameron," Rosella joked with him and he laughed, his hand moving to the back of her neck before he bent down to kiss her and she laughed against his lips.

"You wish, Rose," Poe taunted her back.

He picked up the life support box too, helping her finish the outfit before she looked to herself in the mirror and nodded once, taking a deep breath and telling herself that she could do this. She had no other option. She had promised to go with Poe and his squadron. She couldn't back out now without looking like she was frightened.

"Here," Poe moved closer to her and she furrowed her brow at the sight of what he was handing her.

It was a long chain with a red pendant dangling at the end of the silver links. The red shone slightly and was like some form of stone.

"What is it?" she wondered from the pilot.

"Something just for you," Poe informed her. "I had it made…well…a few weeks after we started seeing each other. I always worried about leaving you here and the First Order finding you. I mean…after what you told me…I just wanted something to give to you, but it didn't work back then. I only managed to get the mechanic to finish it the other day."

"Still not answering the question, Poe," Rosella teased him and he chuckled before nodding in agreement with her and he took the two ends of the chain and stood behind her, letting her pull her hair out of the way.

"It's a necklace but it has a distress button," Poe informed her. "Just press it if you get into any danger and it sends a notice to my X-wing."

"How romantic," she replied sarcastically and Poe smirked.

Slowly turning around, she looked to the stone and managed to tuck it into her suit before resting her hands on Poe's shoulders, looking at him sincerely now as she nodded and pecked him on the cheek.

"But thank you," she said. "I mean, it is creepy and very stalker like, but I know that the sentiment is there."

Rolling his eyes, Poe took hold of Rosella by the waist as she laughed lightly, feeling his fingers digging into her sides as he attempted to tickle her. She pushed against his shoulders, but he was far too heavy for her to push away. Poe laughed along with her, forgetting about the mission they were about to head out on for some fleeting moments.

"You're the most important thing to me, Rosella," Poe said once their laughter had finished and all that remained were soft and fleeting smiles. She looked at him with earnest, her hands moving to stroke at his cheeks as he spoke sincerely. "The thought of them taking you away from me-"

"-I know," Rosella interrupted him before he could finish, her fingers holding him tightly before she moved to press her lips against his with haste. "I know."

Poe nodded then, realising that no more words needed to be said on the matter as she picked up his hand and nodded to him, indicating that she was ready. Poe kept hold of her hand as they made their way through the base. It was still eerily quiet in the morning with no one waking up to begin work for the day. But Rosella was glad. She could only imagine the stares that would come her way.

People spoke of the First Order defector and they looked at her with caution, but none of them bothered to speak against the General. She had vouched for the young woman and that was all there was to the matter.

"Dameron, there you are."

General Organa's voice range out as Poe made his way into the hanger. Rosella pulled her hand from his, not wishing to attract anymore stares on her way. She knew that Poe's team were loyal to him and he was just as loyal back. But it had taken them a while to warm to Rosella. They had been cautious, just like everyone else on the base, but Poe had urged them to see that there was not a bad bone in her body.

He had begged for her to come and drink with them in the cantina. She had been reluctant, claiming that she had books to mark for the children, but Poe had pleaded, telling her how important it had been for her to meet the people he trusted his life with. Of course, she had gone then and sat by Poe's side. She had tried to make conversation with them, often succeeding on numerous occasions. But it had taken a while and even now she suspected that they didn't all trust her.

"And Rosella," Leia said with a nod of her head.

Truth be told, she had half expected the girl to back out of this mission. But perhaps Rosella was stronger than Leia had anticipated.

"Where's Muva?" Poe enquired.

"He will not be joining you on the mission," Leia declared. "I need him here to assist with training. L'ulo shall be joining you instead."

Poe looked up to the Duros male as he made his way out from the shadows before a smile broke on his face. Moving towards the green creature, Poe's hand outstretched as L'ulo clasped onto Dameron's shoulder.

Smiling at the motion, Rosella remembered the story from Poe about L'ulo. The tall man had been something of an uncle figure to Poe when he was growing up. Once Poe had informed L'ulo that he wanted to join the Resistance, the man could do nothing to stop him. But then Poe had expressed a desire for L'ulo to join him and he could not say no to him. It had been L'ulo who had persuaded Poe's mother to settle down and make a home for herself on Yavin 4 with Poe's father. Apparently Shara Bey, Poe's mother, had been reluctant to leave behind the Alliance, but she had put her family first, despite dying shortly after the Battle of Endor.

"It's great to see you, L'ulo," Poe spoke.

"And you, Poe," the man responded. "When you wrote to ask me to join you I flew here as fast as possible. Your mother would have been so proud."

Nodding, Poe released the man's hand from his grip before feeling his eyes begin to prickle. But now was not the time for tears. Now he had to be strong.

"So here you all are," Leia motioned around to Kun, Wexley, Pava, Poe, L'ulo and Rosella. "Black Squadron."

Rosella would have winced at the sound of that had Poe not been there to place his hand on the small of her back. Smiling up to him, she dared to reach behind to take hold of his hand, hoping that no one could see the motion.

"You are to travel to the Crèche planet just beyond Bardotta. I believe it would be wise for you to travel and spend the night in Bardotta. The people there are kind, but do not speak to them of your mission. They dislike the Jedi Order and I doubt they would be thrilled to hear that you work for the Reistance. Supplies are in your X-Wings…tents for the cold…food…just lay low for an evening before continuing on to Crèche."

Murmurs of agreement went around the group before they all went to find their helmets. Poe guided Rosella, helping her to secure her helmet on top of her head before he dealt with his own. His squad turned to their own X-Wings and began to prepare to fly.

"Are you sure you know how to fly?" Poe asked from her and she rolled her eyes as Jessika passed by, slapping Poe on the back.

"She probably knows more than you, Dameron," Jessika declared, winking to Rosella as she moved to her own plane and climbed up.

"I doubt that," Rosella informed Poe as they came to the ship she would be flying, "but I know enough. The perks to being the wife of a General, I guess."

Wincing, Poe tried to forget she had just said that. He was about to offer her help up the ladders but she was already climbing upwards and settling herself into the pilot's seat, closing her eyes to try to keep her mind focused and her thoughts clear. Looking up, Poe nodded softly to her as she gave him a small smile.

She only hoped that she could fly this thing.

….

Poe knew that he was supposed to leading the Squadron as they sped along, but all he could do was check on his dashboard to make sure that Rosella was behind him. It had taken her a while to settle into flying and Poe had made sure that he had spoken to her over the communication system plenty of times. Each time she had promised him that she was fine and didn't want him to worry. Luckily no one else could hear them as Poe spoke only to her on those occasions.

"Black One, I see Bardotta."

Jessika's voice rang over Poe's headset and he peered down, noting the planet beneath him. Nodding, her took a deep breath before he began his descent.

"Black Squadron, this is Black One, prepare to land."

Keeping her breathing under control, Rosella followed Poe and the rest of the Squadron towards the planet, trying to keep calm as the planet slowly became bigger and bigger. She lowered the plane gently, doing her best with her shaking hands as they came downwards and finally the plane was on the ground in between rows and rows of trees. The noise of the engine turning off comforted her as she allowed the hatch to open, the feeling of cold air engulfing her and causing her to squirm.

Pulling her helmet from her head, she tossed into the small footwell before raking a hand through her hair. Looking down, she already saw Poe stood on the ground, waiting for her.

"Need a hand?" Poe asked.

Rosella pushed herself from the seat, hesitantly climbing over the side of the X-Wing before she felt Poe's hands on her waist, guiding her to the floor and dragging her body over his as she went.

"Got it," she mumbled, patting him on the chest as the rest of the Squadron turned to Poe.

"Right, here's the plan," Poe informed them. "We set up camp for the night and get some much needed rest. We'll take it in turns to look out too."

"Can't we just find a Cantina somewhere?" Temmin called out. "At least it will be warm in there."

Poe had to admit that there was a chilling atmosphere to the planet. There was no snow or ice, but that didn't stop the feeling of cold amongst them. Jessika and Kun nodded in agreement at that idea and Poe rolled his eyes.

"If you want to try to find a cantina then go, but change out of your pilot's uniforms first. No one is to know why we are here."

"Even we don't know why we're here," Temmin responded and Poe groaned.

"Just trust me when I say it's important," Poe replied, hating the fact that he had to keep things from his team.

As they set up tents, L'ulo helped Poe as Rosella helped Jessika, the two females laughing and joking about something as Poe looked over to Rose with a soft expression and quirk of his lips. It was something that L'ulo couldn't help but notice.

"You know, I saw that same look on your mother's face over two decades ago," he informed Poe and the pilot looked to him and chuckled.

"Yeah, well," Poe said sheepishly. "She's…she's pretty special to me, L'ulo."

"I can see," L'ulo declared. "How did you meet her? I would like to get to know her more once all of this is over."

"Aw, you're not going to embarrass me with tales of me as a kid, are you?" Poe checked and L'ulo did chuckle at that part before looking to Poe with an amused expression.

"I believe that is a priority for me," he said and Poe rolled his eyes.

"Well, perhaps when this is over you can do that. I told her about you. She knows everything about you…mother…father…"

"She really must be special."

Nodding, Poe finished pitching the tent before noticing Temmin stood there looking impatience. They had all shed the Resistance suits from their upper layers and stood there dithering slightly as Poe looked between all of them. Rosella was slowly pushing the orange jumpsuit from her skin, leaving her in a simple blue pantsuit with black boots on her feet. It was different attire than her teaching outfits.

"Right, you lot head off if you want to," Poe informed them. "I'll stay here and keep watch."

No one disagreed and everyone began to move off whilst Rosella rocked back and forth on her heels. No one bothered to ask her if she was joining them. They already knew the answer to that question. L'ulo smiled to the girl as he passed her and she looked on with wonder. Did he disapprove of her for Poe? Did he know about her?

"No need to look so worried."

Poe's voice was in her ear as his hands held her hips and he watched his team seek a drinking hole.

"He doesn't know anything about you," he spoke and Rosella tried to lean back against him, but the uniform he wore stopped her from completing the motion.

"And when he does?" Rosella wondered. "I know he is like an uncle to you. Do you think he will approve of me? I'm…I came from the First Order-"

"-And there you go," Poe spoke, his lips pressing against her neck once. "You came from them. You are not one of them. I think he will realise how brave you were to have left. It is only you who doesn't see it that way, Rose."

Rolling her eyes, she turned on her heel and moved to pat Poe's chest.

"You should change," she said, changing the conversation. "I'll wait for you in the tent."

Poe had no chance to disagree before Rosella slipped into one tent, unfolding the sleeping bag and unzipping it too. She sat on the floor of the tent, looking around the small space as she wrapped her arms over her legs, pulling them up so that she could rest her chin on her knees.

"It is freezing out there," Poe complained once he was inside the tent, dressed in a beige shirt with his leather jacket on his frame.

"Should we start a fire or something?" Rosella wondered, but Poe shook his head at her.

"Someone might spot us," he said. "I mean, I'm not averse to sharing a sleeping bag if you're not."

Rolling her eyes, Rosella smirked to the pilot. "Of course you're not."

Poe took that as an open invitation, moving into a sleeping bag and keeping it open, urging to Rosella to lay next to him. She did so after a moment, allowing Poe to wrap his arm around her shoulders and hold her to him. Her hands moved between them, resting on his stomach as Poe struggled to zip the sleeping bag.

"I thought you were keeping watch?" Rosella suddenly asked, her hot breath by his neck.

"Don't worry, I have a droid on lookout. Besides, I'd rather be in here."

"I don't doubt it," Rosella whispered.

"Besides, you did well today, Rosella. I was impressed with your flying."

"Really?" Rosella asked from him. "I know I was pretty rusty, but it has been a while since I was allowed to fly. I mean, my father taught me how to fly all different ships after the fall of the Empire, but that stopped when I married him. Apparently the wife of a General should not be seen flying."

Poe's grip around her tightened then and Rosella didn't pretend not to know why. He was always there in the back of her mind. Everything she did she can almost imagine his snapping tone telling her off. Whether it was not to slouch or to remember her manners. How could she forget him?

"Poe," Rosella whispered.

"Hmm?"

"I need you to promise me something," she spoke and Poe turned to look down to her.

"What is it?" he asked.

"I know this isn't fair on you and I know you will probably say no or tell me that it will never happen, but I need you to understand that all I want now is for you and me to be together."

"Hey," Poe said, perching on his elbows as she did the same. "What's brought this on?"

"We're out here on this mission," she told him. "And I know that there is still a chance…whether it is today or in two year's time…I know that the First Order might find me, but if they do…I'm not going back."

"Because they won't find you," Poe promised and she shook her head.

"No," she replied. "I'm not going back alive, Poe."

It was then when the weight of her words range heavy on him. Shaking his head, Poe slumped back onto the ground, refusing to have this conversation with her.

"I will not kill you," Poe snarled.

"I hope it never comes to that," she said honestly. "But I am not going back there. I am not going back to Armitage…to be his wife…have his children…I will never go back there again. Do you understand me? I faked my death before. I cannot do it again."

"Stop it," Poe demanded, cradling her cheeks as he sensed that he was losing her again. He looked into her eyes, his gaze strong and full of a need for recognition as he held her still in his grip. "That will not happen. He will not get to you. Do you understand?"

"You can't promise me that," she replied. "But you need to know that I will not go back to him alive. I will not let him…everything he did…all those children…I cannot go back."

"Sh," Poe urged her, trying to calm her down as she wrapped her arms around his neck and clung onto him. The pilot placed his hands on her back, keeping her to him. "I will never let anything happen to you…the First Order…Hux…no one will hurt you so long as I am here."

….

A/N: Thanks to everyone who is reading and do let me know what you think!


	5. Chapter 5

Poe didn't know how long they had been asleep for, but he knew that he didn't appreciate the empty space he felt when he woke the following morning. Sitting up, Poe looked around the tent to see Rosella sat in the corner, a book in her fingertips as she studied it. She was already dressed in her orange pilot's uniform as she waited for Poe to speak to wake.

"What's that you're reading?" Poe asked her, leaning on his elbows to watch her as she closed the book and showed him the book. Narrowing his eyes, Poe read the title slowly. "A history of Ovanis."

"You do realise that Ovanis is made up of nothing but caverns. It would be a miracle for us to land all of our ships there. I don't know if it would be possible."

"It isn't," Poe told her and she arched a brow, wondering how he knew. "I do my reading too. That is why the rest of Black Squadron are going to circle the planet. I might lost contact with you because of that, but none of you are coming in."

"Out of the question," Rosella declared.

"The Crèche speak our tongue. You don't need to translate. It is too dangerous for you to come down with me. Besides, I have BB-8 with me. He'll be able to keep an eye out for me."

"And if there are other species there?" Rosella challenged him. "Yes, Crèche speak our tongue, but their might be others there who do not who could help. I am coming down with you."

"No," Poe responded. "Rosella-"

"-Are you ordering me not to follow you as my leader or as my partner?" Rosella demanded. "Because as my leader you would order me to follow you."

"As your leader I have the power to keep you from doing something stupid."

"No, this is you controlling me," Rosella snapped at him. "This is you trying to protect me, despite the fact you might need me. You don't know what is down there."

"Nor do you," Poe snapped back, pointing at her as his anger took hold of him and he stood up in the tent, his hands dropping to his hips as he looked around, a look of disbelief on his face as he did so. "Rosella, you have no idea what you are doing. I don't think that you're skilled enough to fly a ship down there."

"You have no idea!" Rosella snarled at him. "I might not be the best pilot in the Resistance, but I am not useless. I used to fly all of the time. I'd wager I knew more than you back then."

"But you don't know," Poe hissed at her. "If I am not allowing any other members of Black Squadron down there then I am certainly not allowing you."

Rosella fumed at hearing him, her teeth gritting together as she huffed loudly and stood up, searching the tent for her helmet and anything else she could find. Pushing her book into her small bag, she took hold of the backpack and draped it on her shoulder.

"Rose," Poe sighed, knowing full well that he would receive the silent treatment from her now. There was no chance she was going to speak to him after that argument, especially when she thought she was right.

"Is that everything, Commander?" Rosella snapped at him, standing by the door of the tent, her glare narrow and full of nothing but anger as she watched Poe fold his arms over his chest and sigh lowly at the argument they had just had.

"Don't do that," Poe urged her.

"What?" Rosella dared to ask from him. "If you weren't sharing my bed then you would take me with you. You'd take any other translator."

"You think that's all I'm doing?" Poe hissed at her and she arched a brow as Poe looked vaguely hurt with what she had just said to him, his eyes wide and his mouth dangling open. "You think I'm just sharing your bed?"

It was Rosella's turn to be silent then as Poe chuckled sarcastically, turning to look to the sky as though it held the answer to their argument. But instead he turned to look back at Rosella, his gaze even and his face stern.

"I love you," Poe told her, those three words enough to make his stomach flip and his chest tighten. "I love you more than you could know and yes, I will do my damned hardest to make sure that nothing happens to you…because…because you have been through enough and the thought of putting you through anything else…more pain…suffering…I can't do that."

The silence engulfed the pair of them then as Rosella dared to look away from Poe, tears threatening to spill in her eyes as she placed her shaking hands together in front of her body. She looked around for a few moments before sniffing and nodding, dropping her helmet to the floor while watching Poe.

"And I love you," Rosella admitted to him. "And do you think that I don't feel the same way? I hate watching you go, but you need to understand that I am useful to you and this mission."

Poe nodded slowly before scratching the back of his neck, looking to her shyly.

"It's hard for me," Poe whispered to her. "Everything else in my life…my mother…father…everyone I love has gone…I don't think I could bear it if you went too."

Nodding, Rosella moved towards Poe and dared to take hold of his cheek and he allowed his hand to rest on top of hers as she remained silent and still in his company.

"I've never really known anyone love me," Rosella informed Poe. "My father never spoke of my mother. She died when I was young and I can hardly remember her….and then my father…he was focused on building the First Order back up and I never saw him until he told me that I had no other option but to marry General Hux."

Rosella slowly stroked Poe's cheek as the pilot dared to wrap his free arm around her waist.

"And then I fell for you," Rosella said, rolling her eyes. "The pilot who found me on D'Qar…the only member of the Resistance who truly believed that I wasn't a spy or a traitor was you."

"Rose," Poe could only whisper her name, unable to think of anything else to say to her before she dared to peck him on the cheek and wrap her arms around his neck, burrowing against his shoulder as Poe's arms wrapped around her loosely.

"We work better together," Rosella told him. "We work better when we're not arguing. You and me, Poe, we can handle this."

Sighing, Poe could do nothing but agree with her as he kissed the top of her head, realising that she perhaps had a point.

…

"Keep steady, Rose."

Poe spoke to her through his headset as he allowed his X-Wing to beam its lights fully. He flew the ship slowly through the cavern, keeping his concentration fully in front of him as he looked for a place to land his ship in the planet. Ovanis was a maze of caverns and it had been with reluctance that Poe had allowed Rosella to follow him down, but the others had also agreed that a translator might be needed if another species was discovered on Ovanis.

"Steady enough," Rose mumbled back through the headset and Poe chuckled as BB-8 whirled above Poe.

"We've lost signal with the rest of Black Squadron," Poe informed Rosella through the headset as BB-8 gave him that information. "BB-8 is working to get it back, but for the moment we're on our own."

"Got it," Rosella responded. "Poe, I think we have a clear space coming up near a small pool of water."

"Spotted it," Poe responded, noting the area on the ground she was talking about before letting his X-Wing slowly drop down before landing on the ground.

Taking a deep breath, Poe removed his helmet and climbed from the ship, his legs shaking slightly after being stressed from flying in such conditions. He looked to Rosella as she lowered the lid to the X-Wing and he moved over to help her get down from the ship.

"All good?" Poe asked from her.

"All good," Rosella smiled to him, looking over the small pool of water.

"Right, we should wander into some of these caverns and see if we can find anyone," Poe told her and she ambled along his side, making sure to avoid the dints and holes in the ground as she they went.

"Do you think there will be anyone around?"

"They've got to be somewhere," Poe told her. "I have BB-8 trying to establish contact with the rest of Black Squadron up above. We'll just have to keep walking until we find someone."

Nodding, Rosella walked alongside Poe's side as they entered one of the series of caverns, shocked at what they were seeing. The caverns were high and Rosella almost shrieked at the sight before them. A group of twenty Crèche stood there, completely silent and staring towards Poe and Rosella as they stood still and watched them back.

"Who talks first?" Rosella whispered to him.

"I think I'm going to let them talk," Poe whispered to her.

"Who are you?"

A woman stepped forwards, clad in a yellow and white robe with grey hair tumbling down her back. Her face was stern and she looked at them with wonder and annoyance, almost as though they were intruding on their territory, which they were, but they meant them no harm.

"My name is Poe Dameron and this is Rosella," Poe spoke, stepping forwards and holding his head high. "General Organa of the Resistance sent us. We are here to look for Lor San Tekka. We heard that he has been here?"

There was silence then and Poe looked around the people who were watching the woman who was obviously their leader.

"Elder-" one person began to say, but they were silenced as the woman known as the elder held her hand up to silence them.

"Lor San Tekka is not our concern," she declared. "He left, but we shall not tell you where."

"You have to tell us," Dameron continued. "He is important to us. We mean him no harm. He has answers about Luke Skywalker. We need to get to him. Please, you have to understand where we are coming from.

"No," the elder declared. "We cannot trust you. We do not know who you are, Poe Dameron. You have come to our home and demanded to know where a man, who we regard as our friend, has gone. We do not trust you."

"I understand," Rosella said with haste. "Honestly, I know how difficult it is to trust people."

"You are outsiders," the elder continued and Rosella shook her head.

"But we are honest," Rosella promised her. "If you do not help us then we fear that the First Order will get here first."

"The fight between the Resistance and the First Order does not concern us," the elder spoke.

"But it…" Poe trailed off as a whirling noise approached him.

Everyone turned around and looked as BB-8 came into view and Poe bent down to the height of the droid as BB-8 whirled around and Rosella tucked her hair behind her ears as the droid conveyed his message to Poe.

"How is that possible?" Poe whispered and Rosella shook her head.

"What is it?" the elder asked.

"The First Order somehow have tracked Poe's ship," Rosella said as Poe shook his head and stood up before taking hold of Rosella's hand, knowing full well that they had to get out of the cavern and away from the planet.

"Poe," Rosella protested, stopping him from dragging her off.

"If they have tracked me then they will be here soon," Poe told her. "Rosella, if they find you here-"

"-But we need to find him," Rosella snapped at Poe before turning to look to the elder, her face full of longing and desperation. "Please, you need to tell us before they get here."

The elder went silent as Poe and Rosella remained silent, waiting patiently for the answer they wanted.

…

A/N: Let me know what you think!


	6. Chapter 6

"We need to go," Poe was adamant on that as he realised that the elder was not going to tell them what they wanted to know and the First Order were on their way.

Rosella tugged at Poe's arm, pleading silently with him to stay and have faith in her as his gaze fell onto her and he saw the fear slowly begin to build inside of her.

"No," Rosella said. "We need to hide. If they are on the planet then it won't be long before they find us here. We need to hide the aircraft and stay low. We need BB-8 to hide and try to send a message back to the rest of the Squadron. We have no way of bringing them down here, but they can try to distract the Order."

Nodding his head in agreement, Poe didn't have chance to tell Rosella how that was a good idea. Instead he looked to BB-8 and the droid whirled in agreement, telling him that he understood what Rosella had asked of him.

"What do they want?" the elder demanded from Rosella and Poe. "Why are they here?"

"Because they want Tekka," Rosella declared. "They want him and they will do whatever they can to get the information from you. We can help you if you just let us know where he is."

The elder looked around to the other surrounding her, but they said nothing. Instead they kept quiet, clearly not sure what more they could say. It was then when Rosella moved forwards with haste, knowing that she had to say something. She had to do something to make them understand the danger of the First Order.

"I was married to their leader," Rosella spoke in a hushed tone, pleading laced in her voice. "I was married to him before I faked my death, but I know how they work…they do anything to get their own way…if that means torturing people then they will do it…they will do it until there is nothing left of that person…until they are a shell of themselves. You don't understand."

"And how can you save us?" the elder asked from Rosella as Poe rushed ahead and hid the jets, knowing that he had to be quick as Rosella did her best to persuade the woman before her, but she was failing miserably. "There are two of you."

"We will do what we can but you need to help us…help us stop the First Order," Rosella said, but it was too late for her to continue her pleas.

Instead she could only remain silent as she heard the noises approaching. Turning her head over her shoulder, she could see them moving towards her, their white suits the first thing to enter her vision as she felt a hand on her arm. She knew it was Poe, but she knew that the people moving towards her outnumbered her and Poe dramatically.

"My, my, my," a voice drawled out and Rosella knew exactly who it was as he came to stand across from them in the cavern, his gaze set on her as she realised exactly what he was thinking.

His gaze roamed over her body and without thinking she could feel herself grow warm under his scrutiny. It took her a moment before she held herself tall, knowing full well that she could not appear weak in front of the stormtroppers and the agent before her.

"Rosella," he said her name, hissing it through his teeth as she winced at the sound, almost feeling sick at the thought of conversing with him. "This is a surprise, I have to say. The General has been rather saddened with your absence. You see; he does believe that you are dead. Can you imagine his surprise when he finds out the opposite?"

"Over my dead body," Poe said, stepping forwards and pushing Rosella behind her, his arm outstretched to stop anyone from getting to her as he held his phaser in his fingertips, ready to fire at any moment. But he was outnumbered. Yet that didn't stop his determination.

"And who is this, Rosella?" the man demanded. "Don't tell me you have whored yourself out to the nearest pilot?"

"Don't you dare, Terex," Rosella snarled at him, this time letting her anger take hold of her. "You bastard."

"Now, now," Terex taunted. "You don't want to taunt me, do you, Rosella? Not when I have many more guns in here than you do."

"So what did you think would happen?" Poe was the one to ask. "When you came down here?"

Poe did his best to keep surveying the situation, knowing full well that the elder and her people were behind him and the stormtroopers were in front. For once in his life he felt as though he had nowhere to run to. There was no escape option presenting itself to him and so he had to keep the man in charge talking long enough for him to figure something else.

"Come now," Terex said with a dark chuckle while Rosella kept her gaze on him, her eyes narrow and her chin jutting out. She could see that they were outnumbered and she feared there was no way out. If that was the case then she needed Poe to do what she had urged him. If there was no way out and Terex was determined to take her back then she knew what she had to do. There was no chance of her going back coherent and breathing.

"We both know why I'm here," Terex continued, stepping closer to the couple as the elder made her people move further into the cavern, capturing the attention of the First Order agent.

"Where is she going?" Terex demanded and Poe shrugged before Rosella turned her head over the shoulder to see them stood before the large egg, falling to their knees and speaking in a different tongue.

"They worship the egg," Rosella spoke, recalling her reading from earlier. "But something isn't right…they're asking it for help…asking it to come out…"

Terex laughed then and Rosella looked back to him, seeing how his face contorted as though this was nothing but a game to him. Frowning and glowering, she did her best not to let her anger take hold of her and remain composed, thinking rationally about how to get out.

"Well, how about we just prove to them that this egg they worship is nothing but rubbish?" Terex smirked, his hand motioning for the stormtroopers to move forwards.

They did so and Rosella watched as the weapons they held suddenly spurted fire. Widening her eyes, she tried to push past Poe to get to Terex, demanding for him to call of the attack.

"You can't!" Rosella yelled at him. "To them that egg is their saviour…it keeps them safe. Do you not understand that? Destroy that and they will never help you."

Terex continued to grin as Poe did his best to keep Rosella under control, wondering where this fire had come from. They had no chance to say anything further as the yells of the Crèche people echoed in their ears and the stormtroopers held them back as the flames from their flame throwers destroyed the large egg that sat in the middle of the cavern.

"We need to go," Poe said to Rosella, but before they could make any movement the ground shook.

Rosella grabbed onto Poe's arms as he took her waist, making sure she was steady as she looked towards the egg, fear taking hold of her as she shook her head.

"It's hatching," she whispered to Poe.

Even the stormtroopers went silent, watching as the thing they had just been destroying began to crack open, revealing itself before them. Rosella tugged on Poe's arm, knowing full well that this was the distraction they had been waiting for. Poe moved with her too as the screams and blasts of phasers began to attack whatever had hatched from the egg, yet Rosella did not dare turn round.

Poe moved first, but he didn't run away. Instead he balled his hand into a fist and launched it at Terex, hitting the man squarely in the jaw and causing him to groan and stumble backwards before his fist made contact with his stomach and the man doubled over. Rosella could only watch on as a swift kick from Poe to Terex's stomach caused him to fall onto the ground as Poe leaned over him.

"Never call her a whore again," Poe snarled, a swift kick rendering Terex useless.

Rosella took Poe by the arm before pulling him along as the screams continued to echo in the background. She couldn't resist turning around, the sight she saw enough to make her stomach churn. There they were; the Crèche people running away for a large winged creature as it flew around the cavern, sweeping and hitting anything it could. Rosella couldn't help but think that it resembled some form of bat as she did her best to keep her footing as she and Poe ran through the cavern.

"Keep going," Poe demanded from her, knowing that she had looked behind.

"Something's wrong," Rosella spoke over the noise of the screams. "Poe, there is something wrong!"

"I know, Rose, that's why we're running."

"No," she replied. "The creature in the egg should not be harming them…it's their saviour…it shouldn't be hurting them."

"We don't really have time to think about that, Rose," Poe told her, the noise of a whirling BB-8 entering his ears as they came to where Poe had hidden their ships.

"Don't move!"

Rosella was about to obey the sudden order as the sight of a wall of stormtroopers entered her vision. Coming to a halt, Poe pushed his arm in front of Rosella, stopping her from going any further into the stormtrooper's path as she bent slightly over his limb.

"Did you think that you could run?" the sneering, condescending voice of Terex entered their ears again and Rosella looked behind again to see him stood there. "Now, you see, I pride myself on being a reasonable man, truly, I do, so I'm prepared to make a deal."

The BB unit at Poe's feet whirled around his owner, his high pitched squeaks pleading with Poe not to make any deal.

"I imagine I won't accept," Poe said, peering into the distance to where the winged creature was engaged in another fight with a similar looking creature, the stormtroopers all abandoning the cavern while the Crèche people knelt on the floor, their arms raised above them as they praised the creature.

"I think you will if you value your own life," Terex said. "I want to know where Tekka is, but I also want your little whore there. The General will be most grateful for his wife to be safely returned to him."

"No," Rosella was the one to speak. "I won't go back."

"And what choice do you think you have?" Terex asked. "I have stormtroopers here against one of you."

"Perhaps," Poe agreed, "but I don't know where Tekka is and you're not taking her with you."

Rosella almost tried to stop Poe as he rushed off again, his fist making contact with Terex once more. Rosella yelled at him to stop, her voice pleading as she knew that fighting would achieve nothing. There was nothing Poe could do except for injure himself. As Poe continued to fight the Agent, Rosella barely noticed the feeling of arms wrapping around her arms, dragging her backwards. Losing her footing, she felt the stormtroopers continue to pull on her as she fought them with every ounce of strength she had left.

"Poe!" she yelled his name loudly, pleading for him to hear as Terex grabbed the pilot by his arm, twisting it behind his back and threatening to break it as he turned him around, his voice hissing in his ear.

"Watch," Terex demanded from Poe.

Poe tried to push Terex from him, but he only hurt himself as BB-8 went after Rosella but was pushed back by a stormtrooper. Poe's teeth ground together and sweat dripped down his brow as he saw her continue to fight and scream against the pull of the people in white suits.

"She's property of the First Order, boy," Terex snarled. "And you'll do well to remember that if you ever encounter General Hux."

Terex kicked Poe in the back of the leg then, listening with a smirk as the pilot yelled out in pain and fell to the floor. Another swift kick to his stomach rendered him useless as Poe bent over, trying to catch his breath so that he could chase after Rosella.

"Don't get up," Terex urged. "Don't worry, you can tell your Resistance buddies that she's safe with us…and any secrets you told her…well…her husband has ways of getting them out of her."

"No," Poe said with haste, shaking his head with haste as fear took over his body. "You can't."

"We can and we will," Terex said, moving to kick Poe once more and completely wind him. "And a foolish pilot like you should know better."

Poe tried to move. He tried to stand up, but he couldn't move. He couldn't do anything but remain on the floor. He couldn't push himself to his feet despite how hard he tried. He was barely able to keep his eyes open as he saw Rosella in the distance, knowing full well that he had to do something to get her back before it was too late.

….

A/N: Let me know what you think!


	7. Chapter 7

Rosella had never felt as scared as she did once Agent Terex had dragged her onto the Starkiller Base. She had tried to protest. She had spent the entire journey kicking and screaming until Terex had deemed her unstable and injected her with some form of drug that made her sleep the entire way. She could still feel the prick in her arm every now and then. She was drowsy, but that didn't stop her from having a heightened sense of fear as the ships docked and the doors opened.

"The General has been informed of your arrival," Terex was the one to say, his hand on her arm as he dragged her along, noticing how she was struggling to keep up.

Stormtroopers rushed about, their white suits covering their true identities and Rosella felt her stomach churn at the thought of the facts that lingered underneath the heavy helmets. Were some of them those she had taught? Would some of them look at her and see nothing but the face of a monster? Or would they consider her a traitor? Would their innocent minds be poisoned?

"No doubt he will be more than pleased to see you," Terex continued to goad Rosella, but she fully ignored him, more intent on getting away from his grip and this entire situation.

She had never wanted to return to Starkiller Base again. She had never wanted to see _him_ again…share his bed…be near him. Everything about him repulsed her and he knew it, but he didn't care. To him she was his property. She was his to do with as he pleased. A political marriage to a girl from a wealthy family did not come with the guarantee of love.

"Do you ever shut the fuck up?" Rosella demanded from Terex and he merely chuckled, obviously less than worried by her idle comment.

"I do not imagine he married you for your manners," Terex said and Rosella rolled her eyes as they turned down a familiar corridor.

She felt her feet stop then and the realisation that he was there dawned on her. These were his rooms. It was his corridor. And he was stood at the end of it waiting for her.

Terex grinned, holding one hand up and allowing the stormtroopers who had accompanied them to leave before pushing Rosella towards the General, noticing how she couldn't even look him in the eye.

Rosella stood still, her gaze on the floor as she caught sight of his boots. It was then when he moved his leather clad hand towards her, his fingers curling as he placed it underneath her chin and turned her gaze up towards his. Her eyes slowly found his and she noticed that he was still the same. He was still pale, dark eyes due to a lack of sleep, she suspected, alongside his thin face.

"It is her," he spoke and she did her best not to wince at his cold voice.

"Told you," Terex said.

"Yes," he drawled out. "Well, your mission was a failure, was it not? You do not have Tekka's location, do you?"

"No," Terex said. "But this one was there. I thought you-"

"-I will deal with Rosella in my own time," he said and she knew that was a threat as she turned to look at the wall, her palms sweating as she registered the coldness to his tone. "However, you shall do all you can to find the pilot she was with."

"You mean the pilot she was shagging?" Terex wondered and Rosella turned around to glare at Terex, refusing to be spoken to in such a manner.

"Shut up," she demanded from him. "You will never find him. He is far too good to be caught by the likes of you."

Terex chuckled. "I don't know," he said, his eyes glistening with malice. "I beat him rather badly. I doubt he'll be flying anywhere anytime soon."

Rosella paled then, wondering if what he had said was true as she shook her head, knowing full well that the General was watching her. Yet she doubted he cared about Poe and her. She knew full well that he would kill Poe without an ounce of remorse if he got his hands on him.

"Enough now, Terex," the General spoke. "Go back to the control room. You will debrief me on your mission after I speak with my wife."

Rosella was about to snap how she was not his wife, but she kept her mouth closed as Terex gave her one final look of smugness before he turned on his heel and left the corridor, the door shutting behind him as Rosella remained with the General.

"Come in." His voice was low and deep and Rosella almost felt herself grow with fear, but she kept insisting that she remain strong. How could she crumble under pressure? Poe was relying on her to get through this, just as she wanted to get through it herself.

Walking into the quarters that she had shared with him, Rosella almost expected him to begin his torture on her, but then she recalled how he didn't issue the torture. It was his men who did that. She said nothing as she slowly walked further into the room, doing her best to keep herself strong. The door hissed shut and she was aware of him behind her, looking her up and down.

"Hm," he mused. "So the rebels wear orange, do they?"

Looking down, Rosella soon realised that she was still wearing the pilot uniform, even though it was filthy and covered in dried dirt from their trip. She said nothing, choosing to run a hand through her hair instead.

"Sit down, Rosella," he urged her. "You make the place look untidy."

She did as he had said, perching on the leather sofa in the bedroom. She clasped her hands together before looking over to Armitage, watching him with intent as he began to pour himself some form of alcoholic drink. Armitage never drank unless the situation was dire.

He looked the same as usual, dressed in all black with a large belt clinching his already skinny waist. Nothing about him had changed since she had escaped.

"So, I take it you somehow managed to fake your death," Armitage spoke, holding the glass in his fingertips before swirling the liquid in it. "We will come to that later on. For now, I have more pressing matters to discuss."

"Tekka?" Rosella guessed from him. "You're wasting your time, Armitage. They didn't tell us anything."

Armitage snarled then, his upper lip curling as he went to sit on the sofa next to Rosella, his thigh dangerously close to brushing against hers as she kept herself looking anywhere but at him. But he didn't like that. His hand moved to grab hold of her chin and he forced her gaze onto him.

"And do you think I believe anything you say?" Armitage demanded from her. "You're nothing but rebel scum now, Rosella. Your word means nothing to me. But don't worry, you remember Ren, don't you?"

Hux would have smirked at the sight of the fear rising up inside of her, but he remained stoic, doing his best to keep his gaze even and harsh at his dear wife. He only suspected that it would be a little while before she began pleading for her life.

"He will find nothing," Rosella assured Hux.

"No, but he might find out other secrets, correct?" Armitage asked her. "Like where the secret rebel base is? Or perhaps all of the plans of the rebellion?"

"Stop it," Rosella demanded.

"No," Armitage snapped back at her and tightened his grip on her chin as he leaned closer until his warm breath hit her cheek and she struggled to remain coherent at the feeling of him getting closer to her. "You are my wife, Rosella, and you played me for a fool. People whisper and I hear them. They speak of how I could not control my wife. They speak of how she is nothing but a piece of rebel trash."

"I don't care what people say," Rosella hissed at him. "I'd rather be rebel trash than your wife."

He pushed her away then, watching her fall back on the sofa as he stood up and began to pace, anger clearly taking hold of him.

"A whore," Hux snapped at her. "You were a harlot for the best pilot in the Resistance, is that correct? Terex tells me he was terribly worried for you when you were dragged off."

"Well you wouldn't understand that, would you, Armitage?" Rosella snapped back, standing up and watching him as he walked to look out the window, his gaze focused on the snow covered landscape of the base before him. But Rosella kept pushing, the fear inside of her now gone after Armitage had spoken of Poe.

"No," she continued, moving towards him. "You wouldn't understand, Armitage. I doubt you even shed a tear when I died. But Poe…Poe is ten times the man you are, and I was never his whore…harlot…I love him and he loves me."

Armitage chuckled then and Rosella was shocked, but she had no time to express it as her husband switched places with her, trapping her against the glass as his arms stretched in front of him, resting on it besides her arms.

"Love does not interest me," Hux told her, his voice low and dangerous as he whispered into her ear, causing her to shiver as his body lightly brushed hers. "Love will not save Poe Dameron when I catch him and have my men torture him to within an inch of his life, but don't worry, Rose, I'll make sure you can see it end."

Rosella moved her wrist, about to let her palm make contact with his cheek, but he caught it before she could and frowned, his brow arching.

"Don't be foolish," Armitage warned her in a whisper.

"You won't touch him."

"And what will you do to stop me, Rosella? Besides, if he loves you like he claims then he will eventually come for you," Armitage said, moving a hand to her cheek, his fingers brushing over her cheek. "And when he does I will make sure he suffers for his actions…touching what is mine…"

"I'm not yours," Rosella said, pushing his hand from her.

"You are my wife," Hux reminded her. "Therefore you are mine."

Rosella didn't bother to answer, knowing full well that there was no use in arguing with him. Instead she remained silent as Armitage eyed her with caution and then moved away, walking towards the door.

"I will return with Ren," Hux told her. "The corridor will be guarded so don't even bother trying to leave the room."

Rosella said nothing further as she watched Armitage leave and then she sunk to the floor, closing her eyes and wondering what happened to Poe.

…

"Poe."

Dameron had been adamant about leaving the hospital wing, but so far the nurses had refused to let him go. He told them how he had to leave and find her. He had to bring her back. He didn't know where she had gone, but he had to bring her home. He had to bring her back to him.

"General," Poe said at the sight of Leia and she watched him begin to shrug into his brow leather jacket, the motion seeming to hurt him as he winced in pain. "I need a ship and I need to go. They took Rosella back and I don't know what will happen to her."

"Poe," the General spoke, knowing that he had been telling her a story she already knew. "The rest of your Squadron filled me in on what happened. I am sorry…about Rosella…she was a lovely girl…incredibly brave."

Poe furrowed a brow then. "You're talking as though she's gone."

Leia looked away from Poe, knowing how difficult he was going to find this conversation, but she had to have this with him. She had to talk to him about it before he became too determined to leave and go after her.

"I cannot risk sending men to bring her back, Poe. They will have taken her to Starkiller Base. You know as well as I do that she will be under heavy guard."

"With all due respect, ma'am, I am not asking to take anymore men," Poe said. "I just want to go on my own."

"You would never make it," Leia said. "They would capture you and kill you. You know that, Poe."

He knew it, but that didn't mean that he wanted to accept it. He didn't want to discuss it or consider it an option. Rosella…his Rosella…she needed him and he had to do everything possible to get her back.

"I can't abandon her," Poe whispered, sitting on the edge of the bed as Leia dared to sit down next to him.

"I know," Leia said. "But going there will do nothing but end in heartache, Poe. She is…I know how important she is to you and I cannot pretend that she has not been well received around here…children adore her and their parents are grateful for her."

"But she's…" Poe trailed off, not entirely sure what he was going to say as he considered his words, weighing them up. "She's not safe there. She needs to get away. You don't know what her husband did to her."

"I can imagine," Leia said.

"No," Poe said. "You can't. The nightmares and scars…she was damaged, but she was strong. She was getting through everything and now she went back. Do you know what she told me? What she told me to do if she was ever caught?"

"No," Leia spoke.

"She asked me to make sure they didn't take her back alive," Poe said. "She asked me to make sure they didn't take anything back but a corpse."

Leia remained horrified, but she kept herself quiet, her eyes wide and her mouth agape as Poe stood up and began nervously pacing.

"I can't…she needs me," Poe said with determination. "So I need to think up a plan to bring her home."

"Poe-"

"-I know," Poe interrupted her. "I know you want me to go and continue my search for Tekka, but I can't, General. I can't go off knowing that she is stuck there. My mind is not in the right place for this anymore."

"But you have to," Leia told him. "Poe, finding Tekka might be the answer to bringing Rosella home. If we find him, then we find Luke and then we can defeat the First Order. If we defeat them we can bring her home-"

"-And if it is too late?" Poe demanded. "If she…"

"It is the safer option, Poe," Leia whispered to him, standing up and moving to rest a hand on his arm. "Going after her now will end in your certain death and she will remain in the clutches of the First Order. You know that."

Leia swore that she saw a tear begin to drop down Poe's cheek, but he wiped it away before she could be certain. He couldn't do anything but turn around and look away and out the window of the room he was in. He closed his eyes and remained stuck, his mind knowing that Leia was speaking sense, yet his gut…his gut and his heart told him to go for Rosella.

…..

A/N: Let me know what you think!


	8. Chapter 8

The necklace around Rosella's neck hung heavy as she did her best to keep it hidden from her husband's gaze. She had held it in her fingertips, wondering if she should press it. Would Poe come to her? But she couldn't press it. She knew that he had given it to her in order to keep her safe, but she didn't want him coming to the base. It was too dangerous.

Armitage had taken his seat at the dining table in his living quarters that sat by the window, picking up the soup on his spoon as he ate slowly. Rosella sat across from him, having changed from her orange suit into more appropriate attire. The black jumper she wore came up to her neck, tucked into the black pencil skirt on her legs. She had her hair neatly brushed down her back after she had washed it.

"Ren will be here early this evening," Hux informed her and she remained mute, her hand holding her spoon tightly as she struggled to eat anything or look at her husband. "I have told him to be gentle with you. I have no reason why. You are nothing but a traitor."

"Then kill me," Rosella demanded, dropping her spoon into her foot and pushing the bowl away before she folded her arms over her chest and leaned forwards, glowering at Armitage as he arched a brow and watched her, also pushing his food away. "I would rather die than be here."

"What use are you to me dead, Rose?" Armitage asked of his wife and she gritted her teeth together before moving to stand up.

But Armitage was just as quick as she was. He moved with haste, his hands coming to grab hold of her arms as he spun her around in his grip, one arm wrapping around her waist as his other pale hand went to her cheek and he let his fingers caress her cheekbone.

"You are my wife, Rosella," Hux whispered to her. "And you are a part of the First Order whether you want to be or not. You will do as I say…besides…as my wife you have not given me what you should have all those years ago."

A child. He was talking about a child. She did her best not to consider sharing his bed again, the thought making her feel sicker than she already did as Armitage allowed his breathing to shallow as he watched his wife, his eyes narrowing as his hand slipped down her cheek towards the top of her jumper, playing with the roll neck.

"I may be the General of the First Order, but I am still a man, Rosella," Armitage informed her.

"Even after where I have been?" Rosella wondered, trying to deter him from looking at her as he was doing. "Even though I have been sharing the bed of another man?"

Armitage pursed his lips together then before releasing her and she let out a sigh of relief. At least she had pushed him away. Saying nothing further, she moved around the room as Armitage took a drink from the table in the corner.

"I will have a doctor come and examine you tomorrow," Armitage informed her. "I hardly want to touch you if you are…diseased."

Rosella scoffed then, but said nothing as she went to stare out the window. "I am hardly diseased. I am not a whore, like you think."

The truth was she had only laid beside Poe, never with him. She had been too nervous for that. She had shown him her scars. She had told him everything, but there had been something about the thought of laying with him that scared Rosella. She loved Poe, but he had understood that she needed time. He had never pressured her. He had always been content.

"I hardly believe you," Armitage said. "But I can have Ren look into your mind for everything."

"I hardly know anything," Rosella lied to her husband, the words falling easily from her tongue as she turned her head over her shoulder to watch him as he continued to drink. "I was a teacher, if you must know."

Hux chuckled at that. "Some things do not change then," he spoke.

"But I taught children the right thing," Rosella contradicted. "I never taught them to turn against their beliefs or do things that scared them. I never did that. But yes, I was a teacher."

"Yet you turned up on the Crèche planet," Hux spoke and Rosella kept silent s he made his way towards her, downing his drink and then slamming his glass on the coffee table by the sofa as he kept on walking towards her. "A teacher on a top secret mission."

"I was helping to translate," Rosella declared. "I was never privy to the top secret information."

Hux chuckled then, reaching a hand out to brush it down her curls. "You have a tell tale sign when you are lying," he informed her. "Your ears tinge red, Rose, and you look around nervously. Do you forget? I am your husband. I know you."

"You know nothing about me," Rosella denied, standing back as the intercom rang into the room and Hux smirked.

"Perhaps I'm about to find out a bit more then," he spoke in a harsh tone, making his way towards the door and pulling it open as Rosella stood nervously, fear taking hold of her body as she saw Kylo Ren come into view.

Everything about him unnerved Rosella. She detested everything about him; from the intimidating mask he wore to the way he held himself as though he was better than anyone else. She had no idea what he was thinking as his face was concealed, yet Rosella knew his true identity. She knew who he was, but she feared that the man he had been had died years ago.

"What is it you want to know?" Kylo asked, his voice low and demanding as Rosella did her best not to let the sound run through her and cause her to shiver.

"Everything," Hux spoke. "I want to know where the rebel scum are hiding. I want to know everything she knows…especially everything about a certain pilot in her life."

Rosella gulped then, knowing that if Ren got in her mind then she wasn't strong enough to keep him out. Ren continued to watch the young woman as Armitage held his hand towards her, waiting expectantly for her to take hold of it. She did as she had been told, but she did not move when Hux began to step towards the sofa.

"I have told you the truth," Rosella said with haste, her eyes seeming to beg Armitage. "I have told you everything I know. I do not know-"

"-Your pleading does nothing to deter me," Armitage said, his gaze cold as he pulled his wife to the sofa, his hand going to her shoulder as he forced her to sit down. He took a seat next to her, his hands moving to rest over his stomach as he folded one leg over the other and then nodded to Kylo.

The Knight of Ren held his hand out and Rosella leaned fully back, the feeling of him inside of her mind enough to make her want to scream. He was there. She could see him in her memories. He was stood behind Poe's shoulder as she let him give her the necklace he had crafted.

"Poe Dameron," Kylo spoke and Hux looked to his wife as she closed her eyes and a bead of sweat began to drip down her forehead. "She is trying to keep me out. She is hiding something."

"Then find out and make it quick," Armitage hissed. "I have other things to be doing."

Ren moved his hand further towards her then and Rosella did whimper this time.

"She told the pilot everything about the First Order when she arrived at their base on…" Ren trailed off as she kept trying to fight him, but he was too strong and he did not care for her screams as she fought him. "D'Qar."

"No!" Rosella yelled loudly, unable to believe that she had given that to him.

"She told the General everything she knew about the First Order," Kylo said. "When she first got there they did not trust her…they thought she was a spy…kept her locked away until she had given them all the information."

"And the pilot?" Armitage sneered and Ren continued to probe.

"She met him on the base," Ren spoke clearly. "He was the only one to talk to her…he saw her sat in their kitchens…alone…she was so frightened…so frightened of being cast out by them…or found by us…"

Hux shifted uncomfortably as Rosella closed her eyes, her hands balling into fists as she struggled to sit up and push Ren away from her thoughts.

"And then he sat with her," Ren said. "He talked to her and she didn't know what to do. She didn't know what to say…but he…he broke her down and she told him everything…the things she had left out to the General."

"Such as?" Armitage asked, noticing how a tear fell down his wife's cheek.

"The scar and the punishment," Ren said, seeing it in her mind as the pilot kissed his way down the puckered tissue on her body as she clung to him tightly as she told him everything about her role in the Order. "How she was punished for teaching the stromtroopers about the Resistance. She told him about her marriage to you."

"Oh, I can imagine," Hux snarled.

"She loves him." Ren declared. "She would do anything for him and that is why she went with him on the mission. She wanted to protect him. She wanted to keep him safe."

Rosella screamed then as she saw Ren interrupt another moment with Poe. This time it was them in the hanger, Poe showing her around his ship with excitement as she smiled at his glee. She couldn't let Ren ruin every moment she had with Poe. She had to be stronger than he was.

"She went with the Squadron because they are looking for Tekka, just as we are."

"And what did she find out?"

Ren continued to probe, but this time he found nothing. He could see nothing worthwhile in her mind. She had been captured and the Crèche people had told her nothing. She did not know where Tekka was.

"She didn't find anything out," Ren answered honestly.

"You are sure?" Hux demanded, looking to his wife and staring into her eyes as she in turn glowered at Ren.

"Yes," Ren said and finally released her mind as she gasped for breath and fell forwards, bending at the waist as her head dropped to her lap and her head pounded. Saying nothing for those few moments, she could hear her husband shift next to her as she gathered herself together.

"But we have the location of their base," Hux said.

"Yes," Ren spoke. "No doubt that will come in handy when the time is right."

"No doubt," Hux confirmed and Ren began to walk towards the door, only stopping when it slid open in front of him.

"And General," Ren said. "You might want to think about taking the necklace she is hiding from you. It has a distress signal."

Hux moved then as Ren left him alone. Armitage pulled his wife to sit up, his hands going to her neck in search of it, but Rosella fought him, doing her best to push his hands from her as he grabbed hold of it from where it had been hidden under her clothing and he held it in his fingertips.

"Did you use this?" he demanded from her, seeing how she was still sweating and struggling to breath normally.

"Of course not," Rosella hissed. "Do you thin that I would endanger Poe by asking him here?"

Hux said nothing, scrunching up the item and placing it into his pocket.

"Perhaps I will summon him," Hux said, venom lacing his voice as he picked up his coat from where it hung on the wall, shrugging it over his shoulders. "Kill the man who had the nerve to touch my wife in front of you."

Rosella did nothing but glare after him as he made his way to the door and she watched him go, leaving her locked in and alone once more.

….

Poe Dameron had not been himself for days. He had slowly recovered from his injuries and the General was about to brief him on his next mission. Apparently he was still trying to hunt for Tekka, but his mind was definitely not on that mission as he sat in the control room and General Organa briefed him and the rest of the Squadron.

Poe had been listening, but his mind had been elsewhere, and it didn't take a genius to work out where. It was Rosella. Everything about her consumed him. The fear was too much for him to cope with. He could only imagine what they were doing to her, but he had feared the worst. He knew about Kylo Ren. He knew what he was capable of.

Once Leia had finished telling them about the prison they were to break into, Poe hung back, looking to Leia as the rest of Black Squadron left the room, each one of them looking at Poe with some kind of pity in their gaze.

"General," Poe spoke as he stood across from her.

"Poe," she nodded to him. "How are you holding up?"

"I don't know if I am," Poe admitted to her. "I just know that I need to keep pushing on. Rosella…well…she's my main priority. I know that is wrong-"

"-No," the General interrupted him with a shake of her head, moving her hand to his shoulder. "You love her and you know what she has been through. Thinking about her is not wrong, Poe, but I just need you to see that by defeating the First Order…well…that is the only way to bring her back safely."

"Yeah," Poe said, agreeing with her in a half-hearted fashion. "But I was thinking…Rosella…she would never tell Hux anything willingly. You know that, don't you? We can trust her."

"I've had the same thought," Leia admitted to the pilot and she moved to sink down into the seat in the room while Poe went to sit beside her, leaning forwards, his leather jacket squelching around his body as he made the movement.

"I know that…well…they have the ways to get information from her." Leia admitted and Poe nodded in agreement with her. "And that means finding out where the base is."

"Do you not think it best if we evacuate?" Poe asked from her. "Go somewhere else?"

"Perhaps," Leia admitted. "I just fear that nowhere is safe, Poe. We could keep running and we might never outrun them."

Nodding, Poe seemed to agree with her as she let her hand fall to his shoulder, her gaze softening as she looked into his eyes and he felt a sigh leave his lips.

"Go with the rest of the Squadron," Leia said in a small voice. "Go with them and find Tekka. Help defeat the First Order and think of her while you do it. You know that Rosella would want you to do this and not run right into the clutches of the First Order."

"It's just the not knowing," Poe admitted to Leia, knowing full well that the General probably didn't want to hear his concerns. "It's the not knowing of what they are doing to her. I mean, she is the wife of one of the most powerful men in the Order. I doubt they appreciate her running off and betraying them."

"Whatever they are doing…have done…" Leia said, struggling to comprehend as Poe let his hands clasp together. "She is strong. Have faith that she is stronger than you think."

"But you know what she was like when she came here," Poe said to Leia. "You saw her then. She was broken…I'd never seen anyone so outcast as she had been. She barely spoke."

"She was wracked with guilt," Leia reminded him. "She was consumed with it because of what she had been a part of, but you brought her out, Poe. I won't tell you what people whispered when they saw you with her."

Poe smirked then as Leia squeezed his shoulder once more.

"But she came here," Leia reminded him. "She was brave enough to run away and face her fears. She will be brave enough to hold on until we bring her back here…back home."

Nodding, Poe could only do that as he pushed himself to his feet and walked away, his mind wandering back to that day he had met her.

 _Fourteen months earlier_

 _Walking into the canteen, Poe held his tray in one hand as he went to fill it up with food, wondering what delights they would be serving that morning. After a late night, Poe had wanted nothing more than to sleep in, but he had failed miserably in that task. Instead he found himself awake earlier than normal. He knew that he should get breakfast while it was quiet._

 _There were only a few people milling about as he grabbed hold of some bread and broth, a cup of water dangling on his tray too as he looked around for a table. That was when he first saw her sat in the corner on the metal bench, peering down at her food as she toyed with it on her spoon._

 _Poe had heard them whisper about the First Order defector. He had heard that she had been kept under quarantine until they decided that she could be trusted. Poe had not really seen her around the base, but he had heard the whispers._

 _Looking at her, he saw how she kept on pushing her hair behind her ears, her curls falling limply down her back. She looked gaunt and pale, her eyes rimmed with dark circles as though she hadn't gotten any sleep. The clothes she wore, a simple black dress, hung loosely on her frame, clearly showing her lack of figure._

 _But as he stared at her, he kept on moving towards her, unable to stop himself until he had set his tray down on the table and settled across from her. Her eyes lifted up and he saw her lips purse as she observed him._

" _I saw you looking pretty lonely," he told her in a confident voice as he picked at his food and she placed her spoon to the side, clearly having no interest in eating anything. "Anyway, I'm Poe Dameron, pilot."_

 _He held his hand out to her, but she only looked at it and Poe chuckled._

" _I don't bite," Poe told her._

" _Rosella," she responded, her voice small and broken as she kept her hand by her side and Poe lowered his._

" _Rosella," he nodded. "Pretty name."_

 _She didn't blush like other women tended to. Instead she looked around as people began to fill into the room and Poe saw her instantly look uncomfortable._

" _Anyway, Rosella," Poe said, trying to distract her back to him. "I'm sorry I haven't introduced myself before. The General told me about you. You were incredibly brave-"_

" _-No I wasn't," Rosella interrupted him. "I did nothing brave."_

" _You defected from the First Order," Poe told her. "I think that's pretty brave."_

" _You don't know," Rosella said, shaking her head back and forth. "You don't know what I was…what I did…nothing about me is brave. You shouldn't sit with me. People are staring."_

 _Poe looked around, nodding his head as he agreed with her. "So they are," he said._

" _I should go," Rosella said. "I don't want people whispering…or talking…"_

" _You're as much a part of the Resistance now as anyone else."_

" _But I wasn't," Rosella said. "I was a traitor and I don't belong here. I don't know why I came. I thought that I was doing the right thing, but I don't know…I should go."_

 _She made a move to stand up, but Poe took hold of her wrist, stopping her from going anywhere as she let her gaze flicker over to him, her mouth gaping slightly as she watched him with intrigue and he gave her a slim smile._

" _You don't need to hide," Poe told her. "You've proved yourself. Just sit down and eat."_

" _I'm not hungry," she replied and Poe scoffed._

" _I can see," he told her. "You haven't been eating in weeks, really, have you? You're gaunt."_

" _Why are you here?" Rosella asked him, ignoring his comments as she allowed her brow to furrow with intrigue, her eyes widening at the sight of him while Poe shrugged his shoulders._

" _Because I know," Poe told her. "I know how it feels to be alone…to feel as though you have no one to talk to. You can pretend all you like, Rosella, but I can see it in your eyes. And I think that everyone needs someone to talk to, so here I am."_

 _He motioned to himself and Rosella shook her head. "People will talk."_

" _Let 'em," he told her with a nonchalant shrug. "I don't care. If they have an issue then they can bring it up with me. Come on, Rosella, just eat something. I promise the food isn't as bad as it looks."_

 _She did smile weakly then and Poe couldn't help but grin at the motion as he nodded his head slowly and watched her pick up her spoon. Perhaps it would just take time for her to open up to him._

…

A/N: Let me know what you think! No idea if people are reading so any comment would be awesome!


	9. Chapter 9

Rosella could not quite believe what she was hearing from Armitage as she sat across from him at the dinner table the following night. He had barely spoken to her all night, preferring to keep her guessing what he was thinking. If only he knew that all she could feel was guilt. She had run off to the Resistance and now she had betrayed them. She had given away their location. Perhaps she should never have left in the first place. Perhaps she would have kept Poe and the rest of them safer if she had stayed with the First Order.

All she could feel was a sickening feeling at the thought of the Resistance being destroyed by the First Order. If that happened then there really was no way out. That thought made her feel even worse than before.

"The Supreme Leader Snoke seems to have had a change of heart, Rose," Armitage said, picking at his salad as he watched his wife stare over to him. He could not deny that she was beautiful. His attraction to her most certainly had not gone since she had left him and, even now, he still found himself wanting her more than he cared to admit.

"Why?" Rosella asked him.

"He wants you to begin teaching again."

"No," Rosella said without missing a beat.

"I do not think that this is up for discussion, Rose," Hux told her, his voice dangerously low as he placed his knife and fork together and then stood up, moving to the centre of the large table to pick up the jug of water.

"I won't do it," Rosella told him, her voice low and harsh. "I don't want to."

"It is not a case of what you want," Hux sniped at her. "It is a case of what you shall do. You shall return to teaching them everything they need to know about the First Order until they are old enough to become stormtroopers."

"I can't!" Rosella yelled then, slamming her knife and fork down onto the table as she stood up, bending at the waist slightly as she made the motion, watching as her husband poured himself another glass of water once he had sat in his seat.

Rosella moved around to him, standing by where he sat as she bent down, her hands resting on the table, her palms flat on the surface.

"I can't," she snarled at him. "I can't go back to teaching them. They are innocent, Armitage. They have done nothing to deserve this treatment. They are just children and I won't poison their minds…I can't…"

"Again," Armitage drawled after sipping on his water, "it is not entirely a case of what you want, Rosella. It never has been a case of what you want. Your duty is to be a teacher. It is what you trained to be, therefore you will do that."

"Shut up," Rosella demanded and began to move around the room. "If you take me into that room then I will teach them what they should learn…not what you want me to teach them."

"Do that and we shall have no problems in torturing you again, Rosella," he told her. "Do you remember that room? That room-"

"-Of course I do, you bastard," Rosella snapped out and she saw his cheeks tinge red as the anger grew inside of him. "I had nightmares about that room for weeks when I left. And you let me…you let them torture me…hurt me…my own husband. It was then when I realised that there was no goodness in you. You never loved me."

"Loved you?" Armitage demanded from her. "My duty is not to love you. My duty is to respect you. I do that, Rosella. I have always done that for you, but I cannot respect you when you act like you do."

"When I act like a normal person?" Rosella asked him. "All I wanted was to marry someone who loved me and thought like me, but no, I was sold to you. I was given to you and I realised that you loved nothing but the First Order."

"Have you quite finished?" Armitage asked from her, looking bored as he sipped on his water and she rolled her eyes and moved towards the bedroom off of the living quarters.

She slammed the door shut and went to pace up and down the length of the bed. She hadn't expected him to follow her, but he had done. He moved towards her, losing all sense of his usual calmness and control as he grabbed hold of her by her hands. She struggled to push him from her as he grabbed her by the wrists and pushed her against the wall.

"You are being nothing but insolent," he told her, his face close to hers as she tried to buck him off of her, but she failed miserably. "You are the wife of the General of the First Order and you are to behave in such a manner. Now, you are to do everything I say. You are to go and teach. You are to be obedient."

"Or what?" Rosella demanded from him. "I told you; take me back to that room and torture me. I won't do it."

"Do you think that I don't have the upper hand?" Hux asked from her. "Do you not know how easy it would be for me to go and send my men to bring your sweet pilot here? I don't know why I haven't done it yet because I would love nothing more than to bring him here and kill him in front of you."

"You would never find him," Rosella said and Hux chuckled.

"I suspect I would find him on D'Qar," he told her.

Gulping, Rosella looked away, knowing that Armitage knew where they were. She looked away as she saw him smirk, but she did her best to keep her anger under control as she felt his hands move to her cheeks, forcing her to look at him as he saw her eyes begin to water.

"You see, Rosella," Armitage said. "I do have leverage over you, so you will do exactly as I say…but for now…I think it would be for the best if you start with your wifely duties. You have been rather remiss, recently."

She began to shake as she felt him pull her jumper out of the waistband of her skirt as his nose inhaled sharply, pressing at her neck as she did her best not to think of the feeling of his hands on her. It was only when he kissed her softly on the neck did she close her eyes and let her mind wander back to Poe.

 _Thirteen months earlier_

 _Poe had been getting to know Rosella better over the first few weeks, but he still struggled to get any information out of her. She had been at breakfast and she had dined with him. She had even walked with him through the corridors of the base, even though she had kept her gaze on the floor, refusing to look at him as he watched her. She didn't like the idea of people staring at her. It was bad enough that she heard them whispering._

 _She had been wandering around the outside of the base one morning when Poe came across her. She was stood on the field at the back of the base, her arms folded over her chest as she watched the building in the distance. It was a simple steel building that had been used as a school before the teacher had returned home. There were still books and furniture inside of it._

" _Morning," Poe called, his voice chirpy as he came to stand next to her, dressed in jeans and his usual brown leather jacket. He noticed that she was wearing her usual black dress, her legs bare and the boots on her feet too big for her._

" _Was this a school?" Rosella asked from him and he nodded._

" _Yeah," he said. "It's been abandoned for…like…three months or so. The previous teacher had to go back home."_

 _Before he even had a chance to ask her why she had asked, she was walking towards it. Poe frowned, wondering what she was doing before he followed her, keeping a few paces back. She pushed open the door and moved inside, the lights instantly coming on as she looked around. The dust had settled thickly on the furniture and some of the desks were still covered with notes and books._

" _So…" Poe drawled, standing in the doorway as she wandered around. "Is there a reason why you're here?"_

" _I used to be a teacher," Rosella said, looking around and not at Poe as she spoke without thinking for the first time in a long time. "When I was with the First Order I was a teacher. I…well…I taught them about the First Order…about what it stood for and what their role was to play in it."_

 _Poe said nothing, watching as her hands touched the spines of the books on the shelves. He did move further into the room and perch on one of the desks, folding his arms as she continued to talk. This was the most she had opened up to him and he wondered whether or not he was slowly breaking her down._

" _They were training to become stormtroopers," Rosella continued. "They were…so young though. They were little and they didn't understand any of it, not really. They wanted to play and read stories. They wanted to be children, not think of their future…not learn about order and control…"_

 _She kept quiet for a moment and then moved her hands to rest on the sides of the shelf._

" _And I did it," Rosella whispered. "I did everything they asked of me. I brainwashed those children…I didn't help them…I should have done more…I should have helped them, but I left it too late. I left it far too late and when I did what I should have done years ago…he hurt me…he hurt me so much. I mean, I knew he never loved me, but I never thought that he would let them touch me…hurt me…"_

 _Poe moved then as he heard her voice begin to break. He wasn't entirely too sure who she was talking about, but he suspected it might be someone she was either courting or married to. He moved his hands out to her and dared to try and take her into his arms, but she moved away._

" _Don't," she demanded, tears falling down her cheeks as she backed away from Poe. "I don't deserve your sympathy."_

" _I'm not giving you sympathy," Poe assured her. "What I am trying to give you is comfort."_

" _I don't even deserve that," she mumbled and he shrugged._

" _I think you do," he told her. "I think that you're not a bad person, Rosella. You're not like them. You're different."_

" _I'm still not good," Rosella said. "And I should never have come here."_

 _Poe grabbed hold of her wrist then, but as she moved he saw something else inside of her. It was something different to shyness, but it was true fear. He saw true fear inside of her over what she had just relived and Poe couldn't help but force her into his arms, trying to show her that she wasn't alone. She was stiff in his grip, but he was unrelenting. Finally, he felt her tears begin to stain his shirt and he realised that she was no longer trying to fight him._

" _You're not alone now," Poe whispered down to her. "You'll never be alone."_

….

A/N: Another flashback. We catch up with Poe in the next chapter!


	10. Chapter 10

Rosella's life seemed to go by and she didn't know what she should, or could, do. Her husband had told her that she was expected to go and teach the following day, but she had continued to refuse. She had sat on the sofa and refused to go. The morning soon came around and she was still in the same position as Armitage left the bedroom, dressed in his usual pristine outfit.

He adjusted the belt on his trousers as Rosella kept her eyes away from him. She was wearing a simple black blouse that had been tucked into her skirt. The flat shoes on her feet dangled off of them as she kept her legs crossed and her gaze on the window, looking to the snow covered surface before her.

"You are dressed, I see," Armitage spoke, moving into his small kitchen. "I shall escort you to the classroom on my way to the control room."

"Do you not listen to anything that I tell you?" Rosella demanded from her husband. "I am not teaching."

"Then you know that the Supreme Leader will demand for me to punish you for your insolence," Armitage said, yet there was a lack of emotion in his voice as he spoke.

But Rosella stood up and straightened out her skirt, remaining tall as she did her best not to look worried in front of her husband. Saying nothing, she watched him as he poured himself a cup of water and drained it. She suspected he was going to skip breakfast, as he usually did. Remaining mute, Rosella did her best not to look scared, but she struggled, knowing full well what horrors rested in front of her.

"Rose," he spoke her name softly, shaking his head as he placed his cup down and moved towards her. "You know as well as I that you will do as I say. You have no intention of returning to _that_ room."

"No," Rosella declared, folding her arms and moving closer to her husband. "You should know that I have no intention of going to teach, so take me to the room, Armitage. Torture me…hurt me…but I will not do it."

Sighing, Armitage took hold of his wife by her elbow, drawing her tightly to him. "You leave me with no choice, Rose," he hissed at her. "No choice at all."

 _Eleven months earlier_

" _You hardly smile."_

 _His comment caught her off guard as she let the smile move from her lips. He had said something she had found particularly funny, but as soon as he commented she had stopped her smirk. They were sat in the lawn out by the base, watching as jets took off and landed in front of them. Poe had snuck out two sandwiches and a bottle of some kind of alcohol._

 _Rosella had been reluctant to join him, but she had finally agreed and found herself sat on top of the hill out of the way of everyone. It had been a few months since she had landed on D'Qar and Poe Dameron was still her only friend. He was kind, considerate, plus he didn't look at her as if she was an enemy._

" _I don't have much to smile about," Rosella told him and Poe moved so that he had stretched one leg out on the grass, his other bent as his arm dangled over the kneecap. Rosella was sat to his side, her legs curled underneath her body and her hands in her lap, holding onto a glass of wine that Poe had brought her._

" _You do," Poe urged her. "You're here…with me…most women would be beaming about that."_

 _She did smirk again then, but she tucked her hair behind her ear as she went back to looking at Poe, her brow arching as she saw a lazy smile on the pilot's face. He had taken to spending as much time with her as he possibly could, but she didn't know if it was for her sake or his sake. Most of the time she wasn't good company."_

" _You are too cocky for your own good," Rosella informed him. "Perhaps those girls might be better company than me?"_

" _Nah," Poe shrugged his shoulders, "they tend to hang off every word I say. I like having someone who challenges me."_

" _Really?" Rosella asked of him, her voice sarcastic, but Poe nodded in agreement with her, his eyes serious, just like his face._

" _Really," Poe told her. "You're not like the other girls, Rosella, and that's a good thing. You're…I mean…I don't know…."_

" _Don't," Rosella urged him as he let his hand move towards her arm. There had been times when she had caught Poe watching her, almost as if he was lost in thought. She had sometimes wondered what he had been thinking, but everyone in the base seemed to whisper it. They seemed to whisper how the best pilot in the Resistance was falling for the First Order traitor._

" _Rose," Poe whispered her name, wondering if she knew how he was beginning to feel._

" _Please don't say anything," Rosella urged him once more. "Poe, I don't think…I don't know if I could cope. Do you understand me? I like you…but…"_

" _Hey," Poe spoke to her in a soft voice as he did take hold of her arm then. "I get it, Rose. I get it. If you like me as a friend then that's fine. You know I would do nothing to put our friendship at risk, even if it means…well…doesn't matter."_

" _That's the problem," Rosella said to him, struggling to look him in the eye. "I like you more than a friend."_

" _I don't see how that's a problem." Poe admitted with a frown._

" _Because I am no good for you," she told him. "I'm damaged, Poe, don't you see? I'm damaged goods…every time I think of you…of getting close to you…all I can think of is how people will whisper…how they will say things…how even they know you deserve better than some pathetic school teacher who was too weak to leave the First Order…or I think about…about what Armitage would say…do…his voice is in my head all the time."_

 _Poe saw her move her hands to her temple then, holding her head inside of her fingers as she began to rock back and forth, almost as though she could hear her husband speak to her. Poe had not heard much about this husband of hers, but he knew that he was a powerful man who hardly cared for his wife. It made Poe ill to think that a husband could harm his wife._

" _And he's there…telling me what he could do to you…if he knew…like what he did to me," Rosella croaked. "And I can't stop thinking about it because I hate him. I hate him but I am so scared of him. I tried not to be. I tried to be brave, but I failed. And if he ever found out about you then I don't want to know what he would do."_

 _Poe tried to prise her hands away from her head, moving his fingers down her wrist until his fingers came to hers. Moving slowly, Poe interlaced her limbs with his, watching the motion as she peered over to him from the side of her eye. She watched him with intrigue as he moved slightly, his forehead brushing hers as she closed her eyes._

" _He won't get me," Poe promised her. "And he won't get you. Whatever he has done to you, Rose…however he hurt you…because you are strong enough to forget him. You are strong enough to move on and let yourself be happy…let yourself forget what he did."_

" _Am I?" Rosella whispered to him. "Because I don't feel it."_

" _You are," Poe promised her. "And if that means you keep things bottled up until you are ready to talk then so be it. But when you need to talk then you know where I am, Rose. You know I am always here for you."_

" _I know," Rose whispered, nodding her head once against his forehead as he dared to lift his head up and kiss her softly on the forehead, the motion taking her by surprise as she sat up slightly and he began to pull back from her, removing his hand from hers, yet she kept hold of his fingers, her eyes searching his face to try and determine what he was thinking._

" _Can we…" Rosella began, not sure what to ask him. "Can we just stay like this? For a while?"_

 _Smiling, Poe nodded and kept his hand in hers as they continued to peer onto the base before them._

 _ **Now**_

"Jakku," Poe spoke the name of the planet with a soft sight as he sat across from the General. The previous mission had gone to plan and now they were slowly coming to learn where Tekka might be.

"Jakku," the General nodded her head. "And do you intend to fly out there soon?"

"Preferably before the end of the day," Poe said. "I ran into Terex on the mission and he's looking for the Luke too. I'm…well…I think he didn't gain any useful information, but I know that he has been tracking our movements."

"What was he doing there?" Leia whispered. "How could he know to go there? No one knew to go there except for you and the elder when she told you."

"Well," Poe shrugged. "He was there."

Poe looked away then and Leia knew that Terex had said something to him. Shaking her head slowly, she stood up and put her hand on his shoulder.

"Whatever he said to you; forget it," she urged him.

"He was doing his best to get a reaction from me," Poe said. "He kept saying things…about her…I tried to stay calm, but it was difficult. I struggled, General. I don't know how much longer I can keep doing this for. It feels as if Tekka is never within our grasp. Every time we come one step closer we seem to take another back."

"I know," Leia admitted to Poe. "But he is our only hope to finding Luke. Prepare for the mission to Jakku, Poe. This time I am sending you and only you. I can only hope that we finally find the answers we need."

Scoffing, Poe nodded in agreement. "You and me bother, General. You and me both."

…

She didn't know what to do. Then again, there was not much that she could do. She had disobeyed orders and that went against everything the First Order believed in. She suspected that was why she found herself back in a cell; tied to a chair, blood trickling down her forehead as her husband entered. He rarely did his own dirty work.

"Have you learned your lesson, Rose?" he asked her, looking as she gasped for breath and remained silent. The blood on her forehead was slowly drying and Armitage moved to wipe it off with his handkerchief, waiting for his wife to give him an answer to his question. Yet she kept silent. She said hardly anything.

"Rose," Armitage spoke her name once more.

"No," Rosella said, closing her eyes instead of looking at her husband.

"What was that?" Armitage asked from her.

"I said; no," Rosella said through clenched teeth and he sighed, but nodded his head, looking around the room as he placed his hands behind his back.

"Another day should suffice," Armitage said to the trooper keeping guard. "Untie her from that and take her to a holding cell for the evening. I shall return first thing in the morning. Hopefully she will have changed her mind by then."

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	11. Chapter 11

Poe Dameron sat across from Lor San Tekka, unable to believe that he had found the man who had caused him so much trouble. They sat in the hut, uninterrupted as the people outside went about their business. The night was dark and chilly and Poe had arrived in his normal clothes, deciding that his Resistance uniform might not be for the best. He wanted to blend in as much as possible.

"The General has been searching everywhere for you," Poe informed the old man sat across from him. "Well…she sent me, but she's been trying her best to find you."

The man smiled then, his brows arching as he heard Poe speak. The pilot remained silent, whispering in hushed tones to Tekka before the man pulled something from his robes, holding it tightly in his fingertips before sighing and giving the object to Poe.

"She was a Princess to me before a General," Tekka informed Poe. "Take this and find him. Bring him home and see if you can solve this."

The small device that held the map did not look much to Poe, but he knew that it was one of the most important objects for him to hold. He carefully squeezed it in his fingers before placing it into his jacket and looking to Tekka with a grateful smile.

"Thank you," he said, his voice genuine as he stood up. "You don't know how helpful this is."

"I can imagine," Tekka said, also standing with him. "Now go before anyone learns you're here."

Poe agreed with that, but he didn't have a chance to leave the hut. Before he knew it BB-8 had whirled into the room, speaking in his tone to Poe as the pilot looked to Tekka.

"We have company," Poe said, storming from the tent and looking into the distance, a rumbling noise growing louder in his ears as he pulled his binoculars to his eyes and let his gaze peer into the distance.

"You need to leave," Tekka demanded from Poe. "You need to go before they realise you are here."

"And you need to hide," Poe said, giving the man a brief nod before he ran as fast as possible to where he had parked his ship, BB-8 rolling behind him as he heard the ships begin to land, the familiar sound of stormtrooper lasers entering his ear as he moved with haste.

"Come on, BB!" Poe yelled to his droid as they came to the ship.

Pulling on his helmet as BB boarded, Poe began the engines with haste, knowing that he didn't have time to mess around. As the ship started, a sudden jolt stopped him from going anywhere. He winced in pain at the motion, grunting loudly as he realised that someone had hit his blasters. Snapping out loud, Poe climbed from the ship before helping BB-8 out from the vehicle, letting the droid roll on the ground before Poe looked around, knowing that there was a chance he might not get out of this situation.

But that might not be a bad thing. If the First Order captured him then he would be closer to her. He might have a chance of finding her…saving her…

But he couldn't think about that as he bent down and handed the device with the map to BB-8.

"Take this," Poe demanded, "and get as far away from here as possible. Do you understand me, BB-8? I need you to go and keep it safe."

BB-8 let out a defeated whirl as Poe rubbed his top sphere. The droid did as he was asked, whirling away as Poe heard the noise from the village. There were screams of horror and fear. Moving back towards it, Poe kept his hand on his phaser as he walked back, prepared to fire at any moment.

It was only when he saw the hooded figure raise his weapon, the red lightsaber burning brightly did Poe react. But he was too late. He fired his phaser as soon as Tekka had hit the floor. Groaning in anger, Poe was too slow to react as his blast was frozen in mid air. Fear coursing through his body, Poe tried to move, to turn and run, but he found that he too was frozen. He couldn't move.

Two stormtroopers advanced towards him, kicking him in the legs to knock him down. They caught him under the arms as he gasped, pain running through his body as they dragged him towards the hooded figure who Poe suspected was Kylo Ren. Rosella had told him all about Ren, plus he knew from the General who the man behind the mask was.

Kneeling on the floor before Ren, Poe watched as the Knight also lowered himself down, his mask inches from Poe's face as he watched him with intrigue. The pilot did his best to remain calm and collected. He couldn't show fear. How could he?

"So who talks first?" Poe wondered after a moment of silence.

But Ren smirked behind his mask, a chuckle eliciting his lips as he probed into the pilot's mind and Poe felt him there. He did his best to push him out, but it was impossible. He was seeing everything. He looked into Poe's training and his time on missions, but then he began to search for something more. He began to search deeper and Poe did his best not to let him see _her._

But it was too late. Her image flashed up in his mind of her when he had seen her after returning from a mission; stood smiling over to him as a window in her classroom was being fixed. He had seen her run over to him, throwing her arms around him as he held her tightly.

"So you are him," Ren spoke, leaving Poe's mind as the pilot leant forwards, gasping for breath. "I know someone who would love to get his hands on you."

Poe said nothing as Kylo stood up. "Bring him on board," he demanded. "General Hux can deal with him."

…

Rosella didn't know how long had passed since her husband had left her in a holding cell. The lights had been turned out and she could see nothing. She couldn't even see her own hands in front of her face. All she could hear was the sound of her breathing, but she couldn't sleep, the fear of the dark too much for her. But she didn't say anything. She didn't beg to be released. She didn't plead for her husband. She refused to do that. She would rather stay in the darkness than do that.

The door opened eventually and she winced at the bright light. Her hand went to her eyes, covering them as she heard his voice.

"Get up, Rose," he demanded from her. "I have something I think you might want to see."

She struggled to her feet and stumbled forwards, her eyes still adjusting to the light as she moved to the doorway. His hand wrapped around her arm then as he looked at her. The blouse she was had come away from being tucked into her skirt and her face was dirty, her hair a mess, plus her lip had been cut. She looked nothing like the wife of a General.

"Perhaps after today I can change your mind about disobeying me and the First Order," he told her and she wondered what he was talking about as he led her through the cells towards the interview rooms, that were generally known as the torture rooms.

Groaning as he dragged her along, she did her best not to complain. But it was when he opened the door to another room did she feel her heart in her chest and the blood rushing into her ears. Shaking her head, she moved forwards, forgetting her bruises and cuts as Hux remained in the doorway, ordering for the stormtroopers to leave them be.

"Poe," Rosella gasped his name, moving to stand by where he was strapped to the table. Her hands took hold of his cheeks, holding them softly in his grip as she shook her head and felt a swell of emotions. He was barely conscious. One eye was bigger than the other, a bruise covering it, while his lip had been split. Blood trickled down his forehead, drying on his skin as he managed to peel one eye open.

"Rose," he managed to whisper her name.

"I'm here," she promised him, her own tears falling down her cheek. "I've got you."

"He put up a fight," Hux informed her. "I have to say, he is strong. I had Ren probe his mind for information. It seems he knows where Skywalker might be."

"How could you?" Rosella demanded from him. "He never…"

"He took my wife," Hux said. "He deserves his punishment and more."

"He didn't take me," Rosella defended him, keeping a hand on Poe's as she turned to face her husband. "I left you. I left all of this. Poe had nothing to do with that. Poe never took me because I went willingly."

Hux let his jaw tighten at hearing her. He knew that she had gone, but Poe Dameron had been the one to take her in. He was the one who now held her affections…another man…not her husband.

"We caught him on Jakku," Hux informed his wife, moving closer to the pilot to inspect him once more, his beady eyes fixed on him as Rosella turned back to face him cradling his face in her hands as she urged for him to stay awake. "He had found Tekka, but he gave the map to a droid…a BB unit that it still on Jakku. I have sent my men to find it. No doubt they will find it easy."

"And what did you do to him?" Rosella demanded from her husband. "What did you do to hurt him?"

"Nothing he could not handle," Hux informed his wife, moving around the table that the pilot was restrained to, sneering as he completed the motions. Rosella did her best not to let her stomach churn, but she was struggling more than she cared to admit as she felt Armitage behind her, his hand on her back.

"He is very idealistic," Armitage whispered into her ear. "He believes, according to Ren, that there is a different life for him…a life involving you…apparently he was ever so sweet with you when you arrived at their base. The base…of rebel scum…"

"Shut up," Rosella demanded from her husband, unable to listen to him speak. She shook her head, slowly moving to turn and face Armitage.

"Let him go," she demanded from him.

"Let him go?" Armitage repeated, chuckling as he heard her speak. "Do you truly think I am going to release him? Oh, no, Rosella…I'm going to kill him…slowly…watch him die…"

"No," Rosella snapped, hitting him on the chest as she pushed him back slightly, her face wild with anger. "You can't! I will do anything, Armitage! Please…don't kill him…"

Armitage remained stoic, his hands moving to grab hold of her wrists and holding them tightly to stop her random movements. He pushed her away from him, watching as she went back to Poe, unable to stop comforting him.

"Do you think that I would spare the lover of my whore wife?" Armitage demanded from her. "If you think that then you truly are foolish, Rosella. No. I will kill him before the end of the day and you will see. Stay here if you wish. Enjoy your final hours with him."

Rosella watched as Armitage left the room, the lights dimming as she turned her full attention back to Poe, wondering how she could get him out. The stormtroopers returned into the room to guard it, but Rosella ignored their presence as she let her forehead brush down against Poe's, kissing him tenderly on the cheek.

"You're husband's a bit of a dick, huh?" Poe mumbled to her, clearly trying to make light of the situation, but Rosella didn't smile, she could only keep her gaze on him as he struggled to open his eyes and look back to her.

"I will do anything I can to help you," Rosella promised Poe. "I have to."

"Sh, sh," Poe whispered to her. "Don't you dare put yourself in danger, besides, I think there's no way out of this, Rose."

"There has to be," Rosella whispered, not bothering to turn to look at the troopers. "There just has to be."

"Just…stay here," Poe urged her. "Just stay with me until he comes back."

Her hand moved down to take hold of his as she saw him close his eyes. "Come back to me, Poe," she spoke, muttering the phrase he always said to her whenever he saw her mind wander to something else. "Come back."

Poe managed to peel his eyes open again, gulping as he did before a weak smile formed on his face. "Always."

…..

A/N: Let me know what you think!


	12. Chapter 12

Rosella remained stood by Poe's side, her hand moving slowly across his forehead continuously as she moved his hair from his face. Poe's eyes were closed, clearly because he was drained from everything the interrogators had done to him. Rosella kept her other hand on his arm, slowly stroking along his leather jacket as she ignored the presence of the troopers in the room with them.

"They know," Poe finally whispered, his voice weak and low as Rosella bent down to hear him better. "They know about the Resistance…Ren…he was in my head."

"Don't worry," Rosella assured him in a soft voice. "He saw into my head too. He knows where they are based…everything I knew…I couldn't keep him out."

"He was in your head?" Poe checked and Rosella nodded at him.

"I wouldn't tell Armitage anything," she said. "But he wanted the information."

"What did he do to you?" Poe demanded from her, his eyes soft and his lips parted as Rosella closed her eyes and shook her head slowly, unsure if she could tell him what had happened or not. She had her bottom lip between her teeth as she remembered everything, the memories causing her nothing but pain.

"He is my husband," Rosella weakly spoke. "I…I can't talk about it, Poe."

"Did he touch you?" Poe demanded and she shook her head.

"Don't," she urged him, a tear spilling from her eyes.

But her lack of willingness to discuss it spoke volumes to Poe. Shaking his head as much as possible, his cut hands balled into fists.

"I'll kill him," Poe muttered and Rosella tightened her grip on his arm.

"Don't talk like that here," she demanded from him. "Just focus on getting away from here alive. Do you understand me?"

"With you," Poe told her. "Rosella, I will not leave here without you. Do you understand me?"

She shook her head slowly and bent down to kiss him on the forehead before looking to the troopers guarding the room. There was no chance she could persuade them to leave her alone with Poe. She knew that talking about escape seemed futile. How could she escape? There was no way out and that made her even more anxious than she cared to admit.

"I will think of something," Rosella promised Poe, knowing that the one man she could appeal to was the one man she couldn't stand being near. But if it saved Poe's life then it was worth it.

She slowly moved to press her lips against Poe's and then pulled back, her touch fleeting on his hand as she moved towards the door and prepared to do whatever to save Poe.

"I want to talk to my husband," she demanded, looking between the two troopers in the room. They both looked to each other.

"Take her back to her cell and have someone guard him," one trooper demanded from the other. "I will fetch the General and tell him that his wife is willing to speak."

Rosella didn't complain as one of the troopers took hold of her arm and dragged her from the room. She said nothing as his grip loosened on her, almost as though he didn't want to hurt her. She could hear Poe yelling her name behind her, telling her not to do anything foolish. The tears began to build back up into her eyes as she let out a sob once they turned the corner back to the cell she had been held in.

"You cry for him," the man in the white suit commented. "The Resistance pilot."

"I love him," Rosella whispered. "I…"

"But you are the General's wife," the man continued, pressing the buttons to her cell until the doors whizzed open and he walked inside with her, turning the lights on low.

"I escaped before and met him," Rosella said. "I thought that it was common knowledge."

"I heard a rumour," the trooper mumbled. "But you escaped? How?"

Rosella frowned and stood up tall, folding her arms over her chest as she eyed the man in the suit before her with intrigue. It was only then when he began to remove his helmet from his head to reveal his face. He was still quite young, sweat dripping down his glistening forehead. His eyes were wide, but there was something inside of him. There was still emotion there.

He was just a boy who had been taken from his home. He was like all of the others Rosella had taught. But he hadn't been changed. She could see that.

"Because it was the right thing to do," Rosella whispered. "Life outside of the First Order…it's…it's much more than you can imagine now. But why are you so interested?"

"Because I don't want to be here," he replied honestly. "I never wanted to be here."

"Then find a way to get out," Rosella urged him, stepping closer to him in fear of being heard by someone who might be eavesdropping into the cell. "Please, find a way to get out."

"I don't know how," he admitted to her, running a hand up and down his neck. "They're always watching and I don't know to escape their gaze without dying."

"I don't know what to suggest," Rosella said. "I can only tell you what I did, but I don't know if it would work. Faking my death…it wasn't easy…I…I don't know how I truly did it. I just know that one day I couldn't go on and I had to get out."

"Then try again," the man urged her. "We can help each other."

"No," Rosella said. "If I escape then I escape with Poe and they come looking for me. I need to think of Poe…I need to help him escape…"

"What if I help him?" he wondered from her. "What if I can think of a way to help him escape?"

"Then I would be forever in your debt," Rosella answered honestly. "But if you go back to him then tell him…just tell him that I am trying to keep him safe and if he gets out of here, but some miracle, then I need you to tell him that he can't come back for me. It's too dangerous and my husband would never let him leave here alive."

"Do you think he will listen? I saw how he was with you." He said.

"He just needs to listen," Rosella whispered. "It will keep him safe."

"I'll do what I can," he promised and Rosella moved forwards to take hold of his hand.

"Thank you," she whispered, her voice genuine and small. "What's your name?"

"I don't know," the man whispered. "I only know the name they gave me."

"Then think of a new one," Rosella urged him. "Don't let them take anything more away from you. You're good. You're not one of them and you never have to be. I promise you."

He smiled over to her and she stepped back at the sound of the door whirling open. She said nothing as she watched her husband walk in, his hands behind his back as the trooper put his helmet back on with haste and Rosella went to lean against the wall, preparing to bargain for Poe's life.

"Leave us," Armitage demanded from the man who nodded and left as Rosella watched him go.

"I have a proposal," Rosella informed her husband and he arched a brow, chuckling lightly as he looked to the floor and shook his head.

"What makes you think I intend to listen to you?" he enquired from her, his voice low and dangerous. "You are my wife, Rosella. You will do as I command."

"No," Rosella said. "I think we have established that is not how our relationship has gone, Armitage, but I am willing to change. I am willing to do as you ask…let you see that I am willing, but I want you to spare Poe…let him go…"

Armitage did laugh then, the sound enough to make Rosella feel nauseous as she moved closer to her husband and he moved to take hold of her cheeks in his fingers, soothingly stroking her face.

"I have the upper hand here, Rosella," he informed her.

"I will do anything," Rosella said, her voice soft and trying to be sultry as she ran her hands over his shoulders. "I will give you a son…a child…I will be a good wife…I will do anything…"

Armitage sneered then, pushing her hands from him as she looked at him with wide eyes.

"You would whore yourself to me to save him?" Armitage demanded from her. "You truly are nothing but a cheap little bitch."

The words stung her as she recoiled from Armitage, her face pale as he then moved back to her, grabbing hold of her by the shoulders and shaking her as she tried to push him from her.

"Get off of me," she demanded.

"Why?" Armitage asked from her. "A moment ago you were begging me to touch you."

"Just let him go!" Rosella snapped, unable to stop herself. She knew that all of the bargaining had gone now and she was simply pleading. "Please, Armitage, just let him go. Killing him won't do anything…it won't help you…make you feel better…"

"Pray, tell me why not?"

"Because it won't change how I feel for you," Rosella blurted out to him. "Killing Poe won't make me love you, Armitage…it will only make me hate you more than I do right now…don't you understand that?"

Armitage looked shocked at what he was hearing from her as she spoke, her voice low and honest as he shook his head. He didn't need to hear this from her.

"Your emotions do not interest me," Armitage informed her and she shrugged her shoulders.

"Then you really are nothing but a heartless bastard."

Armitage was about to advanced towards her, but he had no chance as the door suddenly opened. She looked over to the door as Armitage turned around, his face turning to thunder as he saw who stood in the doorway. But he had no chance to say anything as Poe stormed into the room, his fist making contact with Armitage's face and knocking him back.

"That's for hurting her, you bastard," Poe snarled and Rosella moved her hand to her mouth as Armitage remained on the floor, knocked out. She stepped over him as Poe took hold of her hand and she noticed the familiar looking stormtrooper behind him.

"I told you not to come for me," Rosella said.

Poe scoffed and began to drag her from the room. "As if that was going to happen."

"Poe," Rosella whispered, her voice low and scared. "I can't…"

"You can and you will," Poe demanded from her.

"We have knocked out a trooper," the stormtrooper helping them declared. "You need to change quickly and we're going to steal a ship and get out of here."

"You're crazy," Rosella said as Poe pushed her behind a corridor, his body pressed tightly against hers as she was handed the stormtrooper outfit.

"Only crazy for you, Rose," Poe told her and she rolled her eyes, wondering how he could be so charming while they were in danger. He helped her into the outfit, kissing her swiftly before placing the helmet on top of her head.

"Grab hold of his arm," she was demanded and she did as she was told before they began to walk. Rosella did her best to control her breathing as the stormtrooper lead them down the corridors, trying not to lead attention to them.

"TIE fighters only fit two," Rosella informed Poe in a whisper, her voice distorted as they moved with haste towards the hanger.

"That's why you're sitting with me," Poe whispered. "But you need to get out that uniform before we climb in or you will never fit."

"This is mad," Rosella complained and Poe shook his head.

"No," he said. "Finn here told me we could do it."

"Finn?" Rosella commented.

"Yeah," Poe said. "I didn't like his stormtrooper name so I changed it."

"He was very persistent," Finn muttered and they moved towards a TIE fighter once the coast was clear.

They climbed the steps up to the jets and Rosella began to peel the uniform from her body with Poe's help. He removed the helmet as Finn climbed into a jet and Poe took hold of Rosella by the shoulders, looking her in the eye for a moment as he kissed her softly.

"You okay?" he checked with her.

"I don't know," she admitted to him. "Let's just get out of here and go."

"Got it," Poe agreed and climbed into the pilot's side as Rosella soon followed, slipping down onto Poe's lap as he reached around her to take hold of the controls. She looked ahead as Poe peered over her shoulder and began to try to move the TIE fighter.

"It's not moving," Finn called out when they were suddenly jolted backwards.

"It's been tethered," Poe complained. "But I've got this…I can do it…"

"We need full throttle before we move," Rosella said and Poe nodded in agreement.

"I got this," he assured her, doing as she had suggested and breaking free of the restraint.

The TIE fighter began to move with haste out of the hanger as they were fired at, but Poe was fast. He was a quick pilot. He moved the jet outside of the hanger and Rosella wondered if they could relax, but she suspected that they wouldn't be able to as more fighters took off after them.

"Finn, you see the controls back there?" Poe enquired. "Well, I need you to hit them and shoot anything that comes towards us."

"Got it, Finn agreed.

The jet continued to shake and Rosella did her best to remain calm as Poe let continued to fly.

"We'll be fine," Poe assured her and Rosella scoffed before turning to look at him.

"I'll share your enthusiasm when we're out of here."

Poe kept his eyes fixed firmly on the sights in front of him as he felt Rosella shift slightly on his lap. It was only when she checked behind her did she see the bright light moving towards them. Lunging with haste, she grabbed hold of the controls, lifting the ship upwards to avoid the blast that had come from another TIE as the light hit another ship that had been coming towards them.

"Thanks," Poe muttered to her, wondering how he could have missed it.

She said nothing, instead keeping her gaze behind them before she was jolted forwards, unable to escape being hit. Her head made contact with the control panel above them, her forehead smacking straight against it, not even Poe's arms enough to stop her from flying forwards. She sagged back then and Poe looked down to her, noting that she had blacked out.

"Rose!" he called out to her, doing his best to focus on her and the job at hand. He moved a hand down to check her pulse and remained assured that she had just been knocked out.

"Finn, I need you to prepare to eject if this thing goes down," Poe warned him. "Jakku isn't far away."

"Jakku!" Finn snapped. "Why are we going back there?"

"I need my droid," Poe said.

"They'll find us and kill us," Finn complained and Poe shook his head.

"I need BB-8," he declared. "Now, get-"

Poe had no chance to finish his sentence as the final shot hit their ship and he lost control, knowing that there was nothing more that he could do as they hurtled towards Jakku.

….

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	13. Chapter 13

_Eleven months earlier_

" _What do you know about Rosella?"_

 _Poe was about to be briefed by General Organa on the new recruits. He was sat in the control room around the large table where their faces were being shown to him. He looked at them, swiping his hand in mid air to flick to another one, reading their credentials as the General watched him. He tried to act nonchalant, shrugging his shoulders as he kept his gaze on the invisible screen before him._

" _Not much," Poe admitted to the General. "She keeps herself to herself."_

" _So she has not told you anything?" the General pushed and Poe pursed his lips, not entirely comfortable discussing Rosella with the General._

" _I never said that," Poe mumbled. "She's just quiet…sometimes she says things and I can piece together what happened. I know how she was married to someone in the First Order and I know that she used to be a teacher."_

" _And that is all?" she continued to push and Poe huffed loudly and turned around, his hands dropping to his hips and crumpling his leather jacket as he cocked a brow and the General kept her stern appearance before settling down in a chair._

" _What is it you want, General?" Poe wondered._

" _Nothing," she admitted and then shook her head, changing her mind as she looked earnestly to Poe. "Well, there is something. When she arrived here we kept her locked away for a while…until she spoke…but she never said much. She only said sentences and left us to fill in the blanks. The girl was traumatised. I can see that."_

" _She still is," Poe said. "She's…well…"_

" _And you've grown close to her, haven't you?"_

 _Poe could say nothing then, he could only sink into the chair, vanishing the pilots' faces from the screen. It was almost as if they were judging him. He let them go as he went to rest his hands on the table, his forehead coming down to rest on his arm as the General let a smirk pass her face. She had seen that look before. It was the look of a man who was in love, but hopelessly so._

 _Picking his head back up, Poe laced his fingers together and turned to look to Leia. "I like her," Poe admitted. "But I like her more than I should. I know she likes me, but she's scared. She's scared of how she feels. I guess that's understandable considering what she's been through."_

" _And she's married," the General pushed._

" _He sounds like a bastard," Poe snarled. "She hasn't told me much about him. She doesn't like to, but she-"_

" _-He's a powerful man, Poe," she interrupted him and Poe looked at her with an inquisitive stare as she continued to speak. She knew she shouldn't do this, but she felt she had to. She had to protect Poe. Poe had a right to know what he might be involved with. "He's the General of the First Order."_

 _Poe's mouth gaped then, his face paling as Leia stood up and moved to lean over the table, bringing up a photo of the man in question. Poe turned to look, almost feeling the need to sneer at the sight of the man before him. He had a very pale face with beady features, red hair slicked back on his head and held underneath a hat. He looked cold. He looked callous. Poe's blood boiled as he stood up._

" _General Hux," Leia spoke. "Rosella told us all about him. She told us his methods and his use of torture to extract information. She told us about the stormtrooper programme."_

" _What did he do to her?" Poe demanded, his hands balling into fists as he managed to tear his glare from the image of the General and back to Leia. "She's terrified of him. He has done something to her."_

 _Leia took her turn to inhale a sharp and shaky breath then. "She refused to teach for them anymore," she declared. "He saw to it that she was punished before she escaped. The girl isn't just physically scared, Poe-"_

" _-Wait," Poe interrupted, his stomach churning as he took in her words and he let his hands fall limp by his side. "He…he marked her…he…"_

" _Poe," the General whispered, a tone of sympathy in her voice. "I have no doubt she will tell you all of this in her own time, but you need to know who she is and what you are getting involved with. You know that your work carries a certain element of danger and if the First Order caught you and knew…if General Hux knew about you and his wife…well…I assume he would not be happy about it."_

" _I'd kill him," Poe said, his voice flat and lacking emotion. Instead he spoke in a matter of fact tone, his eyes wide and emotionless, yet brimming with water. "I would kill for what he has done to her."_

 _Nodding, Leia didn't doubt his words. She just doubted whether or not he would have that chance he wanted. She could only move her hand to his shoulder and give it a light squeeze._

" _Be careful," she urged him. "I know love, Poe…but I also know fear and danger."_

 _Poe didn't know what she meant. All he knew was that he had to leave. He had to get out and go to find her. Picking up his papers, he tucked them underneath his arm and gave the General a nod._

" _If I may be excused, General, I have matters to attend to."_

 _A small smile passed her lips. "Of course."_

 _Poe stalked off from the control room, his intent obvious as he wandered around the base, wondering where she would have gotten to. He suspected the dining hall, but that was completely empty. She spent as little time as possible in the room she shared with three other women so he doubted there too. But then he thought about it. Rosella loved nothing more than peace and quiet. She would be on the hill overlooking the base._

 _He didn't doubt himself as he deposited his papers in his work station on the runway and then moved towards the said location. Sure enough, he could see the back of her head, her long hair flowing slightly in the breeze as she sat with her arms wrapped around her legs and her cheek on her kneecaps._

 _Poe did his best not to startled her, knowing how she got lost in her own thoughts more often than not. He settled down beside her, watching how she turned her gaze up to him. She managed a small smile, but Poe couldn't even manage that. All he felt when he saw her was sympathy, but he knew she despised that. She hated him when he showed her sympathy._

" _What's wrong?" she asked of him, picking her head up to look to him._

" _I want to promise you something," Poe told her and she looked puzzled as the pilot dared to move and rest his hand on her back, the motion enough to make her stiffen under his touch. She soon relaxed, controlling her breathing as Poe bent down to look her in the eye._

" _I promise that I will do everything in my power to make sure you never go back there-"_

" _-Poe," she tried to interrupt._

" _-No," he counteracted. "I need you to listen, Rosella, because I need you to know. I want you to stop living in fear…stop being scared…even if it is just for a little while because you know that I'm here. And I know you don't want…well…we're just friends, but friends look after each other and I will look after you."_

 _She said nothing then, unsure of what she could say to him. Instead she only nodded, unable to speak as she moved slowly, her motion hesitant as she let her lips linger on his cheek, the feeling of them soft and enough to make Poe's cheeks heat up slightly as she pulled back almost a second after, looking back over the base as Poe did the same, a small smile moving to his face._

" _You're a good man, Poe Dameron," Rosella whispered into the air. "Too good for someone like me."_

" _I'm too good for most people," Poe said, a cocky tone to his voice as she chuckled and rolled her eyes. "The problem is I think you're just too good for me. You just don't realise it."_

 _She scoffed then, shaking her head back and forth. "I'm no good for you…I just worry you'll see that one day."_

 _She went back to staring then, but Poe shook his head, muttering under his breath. "Never."_

 _Now_

Rosella's head was pounding as she opened her eyes, fully expecting to see darkness. Instead she was shocked. The sun was glaring down onto her face, warming her and causing her to flutter her eyes, adjusting her sight as she struggled to open her eyes fully.

"Rose…you're alright…it's okay…"

She managed to look up, the sight of Poe's face coming into her vision. He was knelt up, cradling her head in his lap as she moved a palm to her forehead, rubbing it slowly as she struggled to think coherently.

"I ejected us and we landed on Jakku," Poe informed her. "I don't know where Finn is. I told him to eject but I don't know where he landed."

"We should find him," Rosella muttered, finally coming round as she sat up and Poe helped her with his hands, noticing how she struggled against the grainy sand. She knelt then, her hands moving to cup hold of his cheeks as she looked at him, making sure he was in tact.

"I'm fine," he promised her underneath her scrutinising gaze. "Rose, I promise you."

"Okay," Rosella nodded in agreement. "We should move before the First Order come for us."

"Agreed," Poe said, standing up and Rosella noticed that he didn't have his jacket on him anymore. She said nothing, taking hold of Poe's hand as he hauled her to her feet, his arm around her waist steadying her.

They looked around them, their eyes narrowing as Poe took a shaky breath.

"Which way?" Rosella whispered, unsure of where they even were. "There's nothing but sand."

Poe nodded. "If in doubt, follow the sun."

Rosella let her eyes scrunch together. "Is that even true?"

"It is now," Poe said and they began walking in that direction. "If we find people then we might find BB-8 after I abandoned him here."

Rosella didn't know how long they had been walking for as the sun continued to beat down on them, but she could hardly see straight. Her mouth was dry, the shoes on her feet ruined and the dark clothes she wore ripped. Poe's brown shirt was also ripped slightly and he still had dried blood on his face.

"Can you hear that?" Rosella wondered, a faint noise of echoing screams in her ears as she stood still and Poe listened intensely too.

"Yeah," Poe nodded.

"It sounds like screams," Poe said.

Rosella moved with haste then, slipping up the sand as she ran to the top of the hill. She stood on top, peering down as she moved to place her hands over her mouth, the sight beneath enough to make her feel fear. Poe was soon behind her, his hand on her back and his other arm moving in front of her waist and pushing her back down the hill to hide them.

"There's nothing we can do," Poe told her, keeping them out of sight as only their heads peered over the dip. "I have no weapon…nothing…"

"They're destroying everything," Rosella spoke in a small voice.

All she could see from the small village were destroyed huts and homes. Smoke rose into the air as thick as fog. The smell was atrocious and the screams enough to haunt Rosella for the rest of her days as Poe kept her firmly pressed to his side.

"They're in the air too," Poe said, noticing the sight of impending TIE fighters. "We need to keep low and hidden. If they're looking for us-"

"-They will be looking for BB-8 too," Rosella interrupted. "And a part of me suspects that Armitage is more interested in the droid than me."

"I doubt that," Poe muttered. "I should have killed the bastard…if I had a weapon then I would have. I'd have killed him for what he had done to you."

"He's not worth it," Rosella promised him. "I don't want you to kill anyone for me. Do you understand that?"

"Let's argue about this another time," Poe urged her. "For now we need to find somewhere to hide until they've gone."

The fighters seemed to pass over them without any interruption, but Rosella agreed with Poe. They moved with haste until they were far enough away from the destruction. Poe had no idea what he saw ahead, but it looked like an abandoned ship of some kind. He said nothing, dragging Rosella towards it.

"Looks derelict to me," Poe said to her.

"Guess so," she agreed and Poe did his best to open the hatch into it, struggling for a few moments. He pulled it off and smoke left the joints as Poe peered into it.

"Looks safe," Poe said, stepping into the large ship and Rosella followed him, letting him take her hand and haul her into it. She followed him through the steel corridors as Poe looked around, taking note of things as he passed them by.

They soon came to an open space next to the cockpit and Poe climbed into the cockpit that was looking onto the landscape. Rosella watched as he tried to get the radio to work, but with no luck. He threw the speaker down and ran a hand through his hair.

"There will be a way to fix it," Rosella said, taking his shoulder into her hands and squeezing lightly. "I can think of something…"

"Yeah," Poe said half-heartedly and climbed from the seat. "I'll see if I can get this thing to fly. We don't want to be staying on Jakku for long…if they've already sent troops then it won't be long before they send another batch when Hux realises they didn't find you."

"You…I did tell you not to come after me," Rosella informed Poe, her voice low. "But I'm glad you did. Even if he finds me again-"

"-That won't happen," Poe promised her, his hands running up and down her arms. "And I would never leave you, Rose. You knew that."

She nodded and moved to kiss him chastely. "And I…I'm so grateful…"

"Hey," Poe smirked. "I don't risk my life for any girl, you know. You're pretty special, Rose."

She nudged him in the chest then and moved towards the cockpit, taking the pilot's seat while Poe watched her.

"I'll try to get the radio to work," Rosella informed him. "You work on getting this thing flying."

Poe smirked as he watched her focus on the radio. He nodded and dropped his hands to his hips. "On it."

…

A/N: Let me know what you think!


	14. Chapter 14

_Ten months earlier_

" _She is an absolute nightmare to share a room with. All she does is wake up and either scream or cry and then flee. I wouldn't mind, but she isn't exactly quiet. I tried to talk to her once but she didn't listen and just left the room. I have no idea where she goes."_

 _Poe was doing his best not to eavesdrop, but it was very difficult when Nita Klavos was sat there and talking loud enough for everyone in the dining hall to hear her. Poe had waited for Rosella before he ate, but he had yet to see her. He had wondered where she could have been, but then he remembered that she had mentioned something about having to speak to the General that morning after Leia had requested to see her._

" _Do you think she sneaks off to spy?" one of Nita's friends asked her and the human woman shrugged, tossing her long dark hair behind her shoulder._

" _No idea," Nita admitted. "She came from the First Order though so she could be. But if the General trusts her then who are we to question that decision?"_

 _Poe didn't know if she was being genuine or sarcastic, but he didn't want to stay around to listen to her. Instead he stood up and moved over to her table, catching her eye as she coughed once to stop the others around her from laughing. Removing her hand from her first, she peered up to Poe with some kind of flirtatious, yet smarmy, glance. It was almost as if she knew exactly what Poe was thinking._

" _I don't know where she went," Nita said and Poe let his teeth grind together. "She's flighty and pretty irritable."_

" _Just stop gossiping about her," Poe urged, looking around the table as he tried to keep his gaze even and authoritative instead of angry and demanding. "She's gone through enough."_

" _Well maybe you can tell her to take something when she sleeps?" Nita replied, almost sounding cranky at the idea of Poe telling her what to do. "She's disrupting me and the people next to us."_

" _Just stop," Poe said, holding his hand up as he backed away from their table and left the dinner room. He knew, of course, that by telling them not to talk that they would do the opposite. Not only would they talk about Rosella, but they would talk about how he was close to her._

 _The problem wasn't the fact that Poe cared. He had no interest in what they said, but he knew that Rosella had a problem with it. She didn't like the idea of people talking about her, nor did she like the idea of them gossiping. She just worried what might happen if the rumours ever reached the First Order._

 _Poe moved around the base, greeting people with smiles and slaps on the back as he tried to find her. He didn't know where she might be considering she was the only one on the base who didn't have a role as of yet. Leia didn't know what to do with her, nor did she trust her enough to give her too much of a role. But Poe could see that Rosella was bored. She had read every book there was to read and she had done nothing but brood._

 _She needed something to do before she became lost in her thoughts._

 _The last place he had expected to find her should have been the first place he should really have thought of. She was standing outside the small shack of a school, her arms folded over her chest as she peered at the building. But the look on her face was one of pain. Her brow was sweating and her face flushed red. It was almost as if she was trapped in her own thoughts._

" _Rosella," Poe called as he wandered up to her, looking as casual as always with his hands stuffed in his pockets. But she didn't stir, nor did she look in his direction._

 _Poe remained concerned as he moved towards her, going to stand in front of her as he took hold of her by the shoulders, but she still didn't move._

" _Rosella!" Poe snapped. "Come on, Rose…come back to me…"_

 _He shook her forcefully, almost as if he was shaking her awake. Eventually she blinked profusely, her hands flailing in front of her as Poe kept on holding her. She moved with haste then, pushing her body tightly up against Poe's as her hands clutched onto the brown shirt he wore, her head resting on his chest. Poe moved his hands down to her back, his chin on top of her head._

" _What in the name of the Force was that?" Poe whispered, panting for breath after a moment of fear had taken hold of him. Shaking her head slowly, Rosella gulped once and took a deep breath._

" _I get lost sometimes," she admitted to him. "I think about things and I…I go to this place…this dark place…"_

" _I take it that you have nightmares about it too?"_

 _Poe watched as Rosella peered up to him then, her brow arched and her gaze questioning._

" _How do you know about the nightmares?"_

" _Your roommates were complaining this morning," Poe admitted to her and Rosella shook her head, moving out of Poe's embrace and pushing her hands through her hair as she inhaled a sharp breath and Poe shrugged. "You could have told me, Rosella."_

" _I thought that they would go after a while," she lamely admitted._

" _I could see about getting you transferred-"_

" _-I already asked," Rosella said. "All the rooms are full and there's nowhere for me to go. As soon as I wake up I come out here and just sit and think…or read…so I don't disturb them anymore. I know they don't like me."_

" _They don't know you," Poe defended. "If they did then they would understand."_

" _They can't know me," Rosella said with haste. "No one can know anything about what happened."_

" _Hey," Poe said, holding his hands up and going on the defensive. "No one knows much about you, Rosella. Hell, I only know certain bits."_

" _It's safer that way," Rosella said, shaking her head as she began to pace. "It's safer…not knowing…"_

 _Poe sighed then. If only she knew that he did know. He knew because Leia had told him about her husband and the scars on her. He knew most of the things she wanted hidden, but he played ignorant. He played ignorant because he wanted her to trust him. Out of all the girls on the base, he had to pick the one who was damaged. But Poe didn't see as irreparable. Slowly, he knew that she had the strength to piece herself together. It would take time, but Poe was willing to help her. He was willing to do what he could._

" _Anyway, if you need somewhere to sleep then I have a room to myself," Poe informed her. "It's not much, but it has enough space for two."_

 _Rosella did shake her head then, almost looking horrified. "What would people say?" she demanded._

" _Rose, don't take this the wrong way, okay? But people are already talking about us. I don't think they would be shocked if you spent the night in my room," Poe informed her and he saw her bite her lip, almost as if she was scared of the thought of doing such a thing._

" _I'm not him," Poe urged her, trying to soothe her as he moved forwards to take hold of her hand, the motion bold, but he hoped it was not unwelcome as he let her hand lay limply inside of his. "I would never hurt you."_

" _I know," she said without skipping a beat. "I just don't want to burden you."_

 _Poe chuckled then. "Well, Rose," he said, his voice low and light, "in case you haven't noticed, I'm kind of not going anywhere so I'm just going to have to deal with the burdens you bring."_

 _Rosella didn't know whether to smile or cry with happiness at what he had just told her. She felt slightly pathetic and so she made do with a small nod and a slim smile as she kept Poe's hand inside of hers, squeezing it tightly as she allowed herself to take a step closer to him and peck him on the cheek. She let her forehead rest against his shoulder._

" _Look, I have training all day," Poe said. "Why don't I just show you to my room and you can rest if you want?"_

 _Shaking her head, Rosella straightened herself out once more after straightening out the simple dress she wore on her body. "I have to meet the General," she said. "I don't know why."_

" _Then go after," Poe urged her. "Go and sleep, Rosella. You look like you need it."_

 _Rosella did smile then, nudging Poe in the stomach. "Charming."_

" _Only to you," Poe said, his words teasing yet full of honesty as he saw her begin to blush._

 _She coughed and tried to conceal her face as she murmured her excuse for leaving and told Poe she would think of his offer. Poe let her wander off, standing still with his hands on his hips as he went and he did his best not to think of how much the woman from the First Order had affected him. Perhaps he was going soft after all?_

 _Now_

Poe cursed for what seemed like the thousandth time the following morning. After spending the night hiding in the ship, Poe was struggling to remain coherent as his need for food took hold of him. His stomach rumbled at any given moment and he was struggling to think of anything but how hungry he was.

"It's not as if we even have any money," Poe complained. "All I can think about is getting home and eating."

"We will," Rosella called out to him as she remained sat in the pilot's chair, her legs crossed as she tried to fix the radio while Poe remained in the hold, working out which wire went where and how to get the ship up and running.

"I haven't ate anything since I was taken," Poe complained once more. "And do you know what they fed me?"

"A small slice of sweet bread and a glass of water," Rosella answered and Poe went silent. Rosella looked up, peering out of the cockpit to the landscape before her. She knew Poe wondered how she knew that. "I was a prisoner there too, remember?"

Poe squirmed in the hold and closed his eyes harshly, wrinkles forming on his face as he dared to pull himself from the hatch, his hands holding the ladder as he peered into the cockpit, his body remaining against the ladder.

"Sorry," Poe said and she shook her head slowly.

"Forget about it," she urged him. "Anyway, how are you getting on down there?"

"Barely managed anything," Poe said. "I know ships like the back of my hand…flying them isn't a problem, but fixing them…well…it's a bit more technical. I don't know if I'm doing it right or what. I can fix X-Wings, but I work in them all the time…this hunk of junk is impossible."

Rosella would have laughed had she not been so tired and cranky. Moving from her seat, she placed the radio down and went to the hold.

"I'll have a look," she said. "See if you can get the radio to work or something."

"What if we are better off just going into one of Jakku's town or something?"

"No," Rosella answered without hesitation. "You and I both know that if any stormtroopers are still lurking then we have no chance. There are only two of us…we're best off staying hidden."

Poe climbed out from the hatch and allowed Rosella to climb down. He didn't bother to challenge her as he saw her set to work, clearly engrossed on finding a way to get them out of the mess as soon as possible. She was quick, pushing on wires and buttons. Poe stopped watching and moved into the cockpit, flopping into the seat as his stomach grumbled.

"Oh shut it," Poe muttered to his gut as he picked up the radio.

He began tweaking things slightly, but nothing major before he heard a loud noise come from the device. It was high pitched and enough to make him slam it down and curse loudly.

Popping her head up from the hatch, Rosella moved out again and rushed into the cockpit, perching on the arm of the pilot's chair as Poe watched her pick the device up.

"What did you do?" she demanded from Poe. "I've been working on this for hours."

"Nothing," Poe said to her and she looked to him with a lack of belief. "Honestly, Rose, I didn't do anything."

"Well you must have done something," Rosella informed him. "All I need is to find the right frequency for the Resistance…make sure they pick up the call…"

"How hard is that?" Poe asked and Rosella shrugged before looking down to him again.

"If…if the First Order are still out there then there is a chance that they might pick it up and if they do then they will get to us quicker than the Resistance can get to us." Rosella explained. "But it's the only chance we have and I don't know what to do unless we can get the ship up and flying."

"I doubt it," Poe snorted. "But we can try again. If both of us are working on it then we might be able to do something."

"And if we can't?" Rosella worried and Poe took her hand inside of his.

"If we can't fix it by nightfall then we use the radio," Poe said. "It's our only chance of getting out of here, Rosella."

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	15. Chapter 15

Poe was struggling to focus as his stomach continued to churn with worry. The pair of them were down the hatch of the ship, trying to fix it and get themselves away from Jakku. Rosella was knelt on the floor, doing her best to try and find how to get the ship to fly. Poe was knelt by her side, handing her any tools she asked for. He had to admit that she looked a mess, but he suspected he looked just as bad as she did. The skirt she wore had a large slit up its side and her shirt was un-tucked from its waistband.

Her face was covered in dirt and her hair matted. Poe was still bruised and the clothes he wore were also covered in muck and ruined.

"I think I might have found something," Rosella whispered, peering into the electrical system they had just removed a grate from. Rosella chewed down on the screwdriver in between her teeth as she fiddled around, doing her best to find the cable she suspected had been frazzled.

"Do you want me to take a look?" Poe wondered.

"Yeah," Rosella said. "You're better at this than me."

She moved back, scooting away from the gap as Poe took her place. He peered into the gap and let out a loud laugh. Rosella let her brow arch as she titled her head to the side. Poe laughed once more then as he pulled back and rested on his heels, moving to take hold of Rosella by the waist as he moved to kiss her firmly on the forehead.

"We're outta here," he informed her. "We're going, Rose."

…

The relief that flowed through Rosella's veins when they were in the air and moving away from Jakku was enough to make her smile and laugh as she leaned over the pilot's chair, wrapping her arms around Poe's neck as she kissed him tenderly on the cheek, her chin resting on his forehead as the pilot kept one hand on the controls and his other hand cradled Rosella's hands that rested on his chest.

"Back to D'Qar," Poe said in a confident and excited voice as Rosella smiled softly, kissing him again on the neck. "We're not travelling as fast as I would like. It might be another day or so before we get away from here to safety."

"That's fine," Rosella said. "Anyway, we'll be gone and that is all that matters. Hopefully the First Order won't be looking for us."

Poe turned to look at Rosella and gave her a sad smile, almost as if he knew something different. He sighed once and moved to put the pilot on auto, allowing him to stand up. He kept his hand inside of Rosella's hand, leading her out of the cockpit and into the space behind it. He let his hands move to her waist, holding her softly as he looked her in the eye. He had been thinking about this ever since he had fixed the ship.

"The First Order will be looking for you," Poe told her, his hands moving up and down her arms slowly. "I am sure of it. There is no chance of your husband letting you leave here."

"I…you overestimate how much he cares for me."

"And, as I continuously tell you, I do not," Poe responded. "If anything, you underestimate how much you mean to him. Your husband is a controlling man, Rose. You know that as well as I do. I don't think he will quit trying to find you until you are back home with him. He knows you're alive now. You can't fake your death again."

"So what are you saying?" Rosella demanded.

"I'm saying…I'm saying that I think it might be safer if I take you to Yavin 4. My father is still there and I have no doubt that he will-"

"-Stop talking," Rosella demanded, holding her hand up to silence him. "I appreciate the concern, Poe, but I am not some fragile ornament that you need to hide. I can handle myself."

"And if they are waiting on D'Qar for you?" Poe demanded from her. "I'm sorry, Rosella. I don't know if it is worth the risk. If they are already there and waiting then we would be fools to go back. You need to see that, Rosella. I think we just need to be safe for the time being."

"I don't want to go without you," Rosella complained to Poe, shaking her head slowly. "I want to help the Resistance. I want to come back and help."

"And if you come back and they are there, then what?" Poe demanded from her. "You end up going back with them or we have a fight…people's lives might be in danger. Just…if you stay on Yavin 4 for a little while then it would make me happy. I will send for you as soon as I am back on D'Qar and everything is safe."

"No," Rosella said. "I understand, Poe, but I don't want this. I don't want to be defined by him or live in fear of him. You and I both know that he has other things to worry about. He serves the Supreme Leader Snoke. Snoke would never let Armitage put his personal problems before the First Order."

Poe had to admit that made sense, but he still didn't like the sound of it. Instead he remained silent for a minute as Poe moved to take hold of her by her waist, hugging her loosely.

"If I go to Yavin 4 then I want you to stay," Rosella said, refusing to back down on the matter as her hands went to his cheeks, her thumbs running along his cheekbones and tracing the cuts and bruises that marred his appearance. "I want you to stay and find out if D'Qar is safe or if it has been compromised. If it has then we think of what to do then, but if not then we both go back."

"I don't want to risk you, Rose," Poe whispered, a sound of desperation in his voice as he moved with haste, his palm cupping the back of her head as he pressed her against his shoulder. She managed a small smile as she let her cheek press against his chest.

"I thought we both agreed that we work better together?" she reminded him and Poe took a deep breath, but he did manage to agree with her on that front.

…

"It's beautiful."

Rosella couldn't help but gasp as she stepped out of the ship that had just landed. Poe held her hand inside of his, looking around his home planet for a few brief moments. Yavin 4 was completely covered in jungles and rain forest. The height was sometimes too much, but then Poe remembered all the times he had swam in the lake by his house to cool down.

They had been escorted into a control room after Poe had informed them of their situation. People had bustled around them and asked what had happened, but Poe had kept his cards close to his chest. He didn't want news of his, or Rosella's, arrival getting out. He wanted to keep things under wraps. He didn't particularly want anyone to know who Rosella was either.

As Poe entered the main control room with Rosella in tow, he looked around and noticed the busyness of the place. There were people everywhere, dressed in various uniform and Poe smiled. He felt a small swell of pride at the thought of everyone from his home planet being there to support the Resistance.

"Poe!"

Poe would have recognised that voice anywhere. There had been a part of him, when his mother died and he joined the Resistance, when he thought that he might not see his father again. He loved his father dearly, but his life was different to the one Poe wanted to pursue. He suspected he was too much like his mother. There was a time when the only comfort of a relationship he had was with Rosella.

"Father," Poe said as the man rushed forwards and embraced his son in a large hug, his arms wrapping tightly around him as he held him without mercy.

Poe closed his eyes for a moment, a feeling of relief passing through him as his father's humid scent entered his nostrils. His hands went to clasp the older man's back as a smile broke out on his face.

Rosella peered to the man, looking at him and drinking in his features. He had the same dark hair as Poe, yet his was receding from his hairline. His face was wrinkled and his cheeks hollow, his cheekbones protruding proudly. His brown eyes had shut in contentment as he kept his arms around Poe, refusing to let go of him.

Eventually Poe broke off the embrace and looked back to Rosella, ushering her forwards as she moved tentatively, her sweating palm wrapped around her arm. She wondered how much of a mess she looked. She had never expected meeting Poe's father under such circumstance. Of course, there had been times when she had not even anticipated meeting his father at all. Poe had told her he wondered if it would ever be possible for him to return home.

"Father, this is Rosella."

"Pleasure to meet you," Kes Dameron declared, offering Rosella his hand.

She shook it lightly and offered him a weak smile. "And you."

"Rosella is a good friend of mine," Poe said and Rosella watched as his cheeks tinged red.

She would have chuckled if it had been funny. Instead, she went silent and allowed Kes to arch a brow, seemingly amused by his son's declaration as he could see differently.

"I see," Kes simply declared. "You have no idea how relieved I am to see you, Poe. General Organa sent word that you had been capture. I've been working at the base ever since…doing what I can to find you and get you back safely."

"It's a long story," Poe sighed. "But I'm safe and well."

"Are you?" Kes demanded. "Poe, you look a mess. You're covered in bruises and cuts."

"Well, except for them," Poe offered a nonchalant shrug. "But I need to know if there has been any word from D'Qar? I need to know if it is safe to go back there?"

Kes looked forlorn then, his expression faltering as he shook his head. "Poe, you cannot-"

"-Can we discuss this another time?" Poe interrupted, his tone stern as he held his hand out flat to signal that was the end of the conversation. Kes pursed his lips, but he didn't argue. He remained silent and Rosella sensed the animosity between the pair at that moment. "I just need to know."

Kes sighed. "As far as I know nothing has happened on D'Qar. We received the secret message last night that everything was fine and well. Why would you think otherwise?"

"Because the First Order…Kylo Ren…he searched my mind when they took me. They found out about the Resistance's base on D'Qar. I wanted to make sure that it wasn't compromised before I went back."

"Not as far as I know," Kes said. "Look, why don't you and your friend go back to our house and clean up and rest? I will be there later on and you can tell me everything about what has happened."

…

Rosella looked around Poe Dameron's bedroom, her lips quirking at the sight of it. It was charming, she could not deny that. There were toy ships on his dresser, which were no doubt from his childhood days. His bed sat by a window and there was a wardrobe in the corner by his door. Rosella had showered for a while, letting the water flow over her body and clean the dirt. Poe had gone in the shower after her, leaving her to change into one of his clean shirts before he changed in the bathroom.

"I found some trousers," Poe informed her once he had finished looking in the spare room where his father had stored some of his mother's possessions over the past.

"Thank you," Rosella said, pulling them onto her legs and letting them sit on her hips before she went to sit on the edge of Poe's bed. "Your house is really nice, Poe."

He chuckled then, running his hand down the back of his neck as he nodded. "My mother and father had a lot of arguments about this place," Poe informed her, sitting down on the bed next to her. "Mother wanted to keep travelling, but father persuaded her to settle down on Yavin 4. I don't know if it was what she really wanted, but I think a part of her was ready to start a family."

Rosella nodded and smiled. "I see you get your sense of adventure from your mother," she informed him.

"Yeah, I guess," Poe admitted, his hand holding his chin. "But a part of me is my father…I mean…I left Yavin 4 to help and be like my parents…but eventually…well…one day, I want to maybe settle down, you know? Live a peaceful existence."

Rosella smiled then, wrapping her arm into Poe's and letting her head come to rest on his shoulder. "I know what you mean."

Poe moved slowly to kiss the top of her head before closing his eyes, letting a spell of tiredness sweep over him as he did so. He knew that he would have to explain all of this to his father when he returned. But he also knew that he would have to go back to the Resistance and even though he wanted to go back; he also enjoyed the peace of being at home at that moment.

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	16. Chapter 16

Rosella found herself sitting in the back garden of Poe's house that evening as the sun slowly set over Yavin 4. Poe was sat inside with his father, informing him of everything that had happened. Kes Dameron had been nothing but polite to Rosella ever since she had returned home with his son. Kes had watched the girl with intrigue, noting how she would tug on the ends of her shoulder length hair whenever he directed a question at her. He knew exactly who she was, of course.

The news of Rosella Hux escaping had spread throughout the galaxy. The First Order had demanded from her immediate return should she be found. The photo that Kes had seen of her in the control room when the notice had come up was the same as the girl he had just let go back to his house with his son.

"You're in dangerous waters, Poe," Kes informed his son, handing him a cup of some form of alcohol as he sat down at the kitchen table with him and Poe chuckled, his lips turning upwards as he kept his gaze on the table, his fingers wrapped around the cup.

"When am I not?" Poe wondered and Kes frowned.

"I'm not amused, Poe," Kes said, his voice a small hiss as he was well aware that the window to the house was wide open and Rosella was just outside. "You know, as well as I do, that she is dangerous. If someone discovers she is here-"

"-Do you think I don't know that?" Poe demanded from his father. "But if D'Qar has not been compromised then we will return there as soon as possible. I know it is dangerous for Rosella to be here, but I thought that you would understand, father. I thought that you would help."

"Of course I will," Kes replied, sounding almost insulted that his son would suggest that he would not offer his aid. "I will always help you, Poe. You know that. And you know how I worry about you. The thought of you being captured by the First Order…when I found out…I felt sick."

Poe sighed, peering up to his father as he did his best not to look too emotional as he nodded his head. His father slowly moved his fingers towards his son, wrapping them around his wrist softly.

"I only have you, Poe," Kes reminded him. "You know that I am proud of you. I am always proud of you, but that does not mean that I do not worry."

Poe took a sharp breath. "I know," he promised his father and the man nodded softly in agreement. "But I have to keep her safe. You don't understand…the things her husband did to her…Rosella…"

Kes nodded. "I suspect she is not just a friend?"

Poe chuckled again. "Am I that obvious?"

"I would be shocked if you weren't," Kes said. "I'm you father; it is my duty to know exactly what you're thinking. So, tell me, when did you meet her?"

Poe set about telling his father the entire story, leaving out certain bits that he knew Rosella would not appreciate his father knowing. It had taken months of trust before she had told her some of the things she had kept hidden. Poe respected that. He respected the fact that she had certain things she had to keep hidden for her own protection.

"I should go and check on her," Poe said once he had concluded his tale. "But I need you to promise me that no one will know about her."

Kes held his hands up as Poe stood, scraping his chair back underneath the table as he stuffed his hands into the pockets of his trousers.

"Of course not," Kes promised his son. "Just promise me to be careful."

"Always," Poe smirked to his father.

He moved out of the door to the yard, treading over the long grass as he peered around. He smiled softly at the sight of Rosella sat towards the back of the garden, her body laid and almost obscured by the grass as she basked in the setting sun. She opened her eyes and sat up as she heard Poe approaching, blades of grass sticking to her as she completed the motion.

Poe sunk to the floor too, smiling gently as he draped his arm over Rosella, holding her to him and allowing her to burrow against his side. She inhaled his familiar scent, feeling his chin come to rest on the top of her head as she made the movement.

"My father knows," Poe informed her in a small voice, whispering into her hair. "He's promised to keep quiet."

"I believe you, and him," Rosella promised Poe. "Your father has been kind to allow me to stay, no doubt he knows that it could be dangerous. I never thought that Armitage would want me back…not truly…I always thought that he would find someone else…someone who would actually share the same ideals as him."

Poe shook his head softly as he moved to brush her hair from her face, tucking strands behind her ear as he looked at her, taking in every detail of her as he considered what it would have been like to leave her with the First Order. The mere thought made him feel queasy. It had been too much to contemplate.

"Your husband is simply a possessive man, Rose," Poe reminded her. "I met him and I could see that. He is a man who gets his own way…if anyone defies him then he will do anything possible to get them to do things his way."

"That's Armitage," Rosella mumbled.

"But it doesn't matter now," Poe promised her, "because you're here. You're here and I have no intention of letting you go now."

Rosella did smile at hearing that. "And letting you go now has no appeal to me."

"Glad to hear it," Poe spoke, kissing her on the forehead. "However, we do have to return to D'Qar tomorrow. I promised you could come back with me if it was safe and it seems that it is pretty safe."

"You don't tell me what to do, Dameron," Rosella joked, nudging him on the shoulder with the palm of her hand. "Besides, I need to come back with you. No doubt…"

Rosella trailed off as something caught her gaze in the distance. Frowning, Rosella brushed the grass from her trousers as she stood up, her hand moving to her forehead as she glanced into the distance above her. The light was blinding as everything was bathed in red, the entire garden turning the colour. Poe stood too, his arms going around her waist, holding her softly as he looked up too.

"What the hell is that?" Rosella whispered, her voice shaky and full of worry as Poe shook his head slowly.

"I don't know," he admitted to her.

They watched as the light continued to pass above them, their gaze transfixed.

"It's him," Rosella whispered. "He's doing something…on the Base…I know it."

"Poe!"

Kes yelled Poe's name from the door at the back of the house. Poe looked to his father who was beckoning for him to come to him. Poe grabbed hold of Rosella by the hand and dragged her towards the door.

"What is that?" Poe pointed to the sky.

"I don't know," Kes said, "but I need to get to the base and see. It can't be anything good. I need you to stay indoors and stay hidden. Keep Rosella safe."

"I should come with you," Poe challenged and Kes shook his head slowly.

"No," he said. "It isn't safe for Rosella to come with us in case anyone notices her. I need you to stay here and keep her hidden. I will be back as soon as possible."

Poe didn't bother to complain, keeping hold of Rosella tightly. They both watched as Kes raced from the house and they knew that something bad was happening. They could sense it.

…

The red beam had finally vanished from sight as Rosella and Poe sat at the kitchen table, waiting with patience for Kes to return. Poe had been pacing to begin with, wandering up and down the kitchen, drumming his fingertips on the work surfaces. Rosella had remained seated, looking to the window as the red light slowly faded.

Rosella had been quiet, her mind whirling as she tried to work out what could have happened. She suspected that it was something to do with the First Order. It was always to do with the First Order. Rosella knew that, somehow, her husband was involved.

"The First Order fired on four planets…the Senate…it has been wiped out."

Kes stormed into the house and Poe looked to his father and Rosella moved to her feet, looking to Kes as he glanced between them. He said nothing for a few moments as the news sunk in and Rosella moved to press a hand to her mouth, thinking about all of those who would have died. So many lives would have been destroyed. So many people…people that did nothing wrong.

"How could he?" Rosella whispered. "He will have done it…I know him…"

"He did," Kes confirmed. "General Hux gave the orders. As soon as it happened he sent a warning to everyone else. We either bow down or suffer the same fate."

"No," Poe said with a firm shake of his head. "He cannot get away with this. The Resistance will never bow to the First Order."

"I know," Kes said. "But if the First Order are not stopped soon then they will either win or destroy everything that stands in their way."

Poe nodded once more. "Then I know that I have to return to D'Qar. There will be some form of retaliation for what the Order has done."

"Tomorrow," Kes said, trying to buy time with his son.

He knew that he could not stop Poe from wandering off, but he knew that there would be a way to delay him. Kes understood why his son went. He understood entirely why his son continued to leave home. He knew that his son had to do what he wanted; he was a grown man, of course he could do what he wanted. But, still, Kes wanted to delay him.

"Tomorrow," Poe agreed, knowing entirely what his father was doing.

…

Rosella had left the father and son to bond before going into the guest bedroom. She had sat on the bed, her legs crossed as her eyes remained on her lap, her hands laced together and sweating. She was doing her best to understand exactly what had happened, but it sill made no sense. The thought of four planets being wiped out in minutes was incomprehensible to her. It was madness. The worst part was that she thought she should have done something. She knew there was nothing that she could do. She could never persuade Armitage to do something he didn't want to do. He was a man who made his own path.

Poe entered her room when his father had declared that he had to go and get some rest before the following day dawned. Poe had knocked on the door, but had received no answer. He remained stood outside for a few moments, but after no answer he peered into the room and saw her sat there. She was clearly transfixed on something. Moving towards her, Poe perched on the bed, his hand moving to her arm and holding it gently.

"I keep thinking of all those people," Rosella told him and Poe kept his hand on her, running it down to her fingers to hold them inside of his. "All those people who he has murdered…and I'm married to him…his wife…"

"You could never have stopped him," Poe promised her. "Even if you were still on the Base, you would never stop a man like him. He's hungry for power."

"I know that," Rosella mumbled. "It just doesn't make it any easier, Poe. Stopping him…I tried once and he hurt me for it."

"That is why we are part of the Resistance," Poe said, managing a soft smile for her. "So that we can stop him for good."

"And if we can't?" Rosella worried and Poe shook his head, moving to draw her closer to him. "If he destroys us like he did the others…I can't…"

"It won't get to that," Poe promised. "We will make sure of it."

Poe laid down beside Rosella after a few moments and she fell asleep in his grip. He said nothing for the rest of the evening, content with just being with her. He knew that her mind was still on Armitage, but that didn't stop her from worrying. She would always worry so long as he was alive.

…

A/N: Let me know what you think!


	17. Chapter 17

D'Qar had scarcely changed once they returned. Poe had gone back into the control room alongside Rosella, explaining what had happened to both of them to General Organa. The General had listened with intensity, telling them how happy she was to see them both safe and returned. Of course, Poe had told her how Kylo Ren had searched his mind and found out where their base was.

But then the General had told him that Kylo already knew where the base was. He had been raised on D'Qar, after all. But that did not explain why he had not attacked D'Qar. Leia wanted to believe it was because her son was still her son after all; that he did not have the heart to murder all of the people he had classed as his friends once before.

Rosella had been discharged from flying out with Black Squadron again, Leia informing her that there was no need for a translator as their diplomatic missions had come to an end after Tekka had been found. Instead she had been told to return to her teaching job, with the children needing a distraction now more than ever before.

Rosella had been slightly annoyed, knowing that she could fly alongside Poe and fight if it came to it, but she was also relieved. She was relieved that she didn't need to go out again and risk being caught. The idea of being dragged before the First Order did not bode well with her.

The time she was teaching was time when she could forget about everything. She could focus on the children in front of her and she knew that she was doing something right by teaching them the opposite of what she taught when on board Starkiller Base.

On the second day back at the school, Rosella let the pupils leave earlier than usual as the majority of their parents had returned from a training mission. She had watched them run across the field and towards the base while she stood in the doorway of the school, watching the lone figure that was moving against the wave of children and towards the school.

"You're feeling generous today," Poe informed her as she leant against the doorframe, folding her arms as Poe came to stand before her, his hand going to her waist as he bent down to kiss her.

"Most of their parents have been away training for the past few days," Rosella informed Poe, moving to wrap her arm around his waist which was easy considering he was wearing his normal clothes instead of his pilot's uniform. "They weren't concentrating. They were more excited to see them."

"Can't blame them," Poe told her and she nodded.

"Especially when you love your parents," she said, kissing him on the cheek and then moving back into the small hut, picking up pieces of paper and tidying them up from the desks.

Poe followed her inside and went about helping her tidy up, grabbing hold of books and placing them back in the bookshelf as he scratched the back of his neck and considered the next sentence that was about to leave his mouth.

"You don't talk about your father," Poe said and Rosella blinked profusely as she flattened out the papers on one desk and tucked a chair in, looking to Poe who had turned his head over his shoulder to look back to her. "What? You don't mention him."

"No," Rosella said dryly. "Why would I mention the man who sold me to Armitage?"

Her voice was sarcastic and Poe knew he should have kept quiet. "Sorry," he told her. "It's just that…I mean…is he still alive?"

"Wouldn't know," Rosella said, her voice high and full of nonchalance. "He left me when I married Armitage and I never heard from him again. Armitage used to give me updates, but I don't care. I told him not to tell me and he was happy to oblige. Armitage never cared for family."

"Sorry," Poe said again and Rosella took a deep breath. "I mean, I knew you didn't like him…I was just curious."

"You're always curious, Poe," Rosella said, managing a small smile in his direction as she put the papers into a drawer and Poe went back to collecting another stack of textbooks. "It's going to get you into trouble one day."

"I think it already did," Poe told her. "It brought me to you."

"Very funny," Rosella mumbled. "Anyway, why are you here? I take it you didn't come all this way to talk about my father?"

"You would be correct," Poe informed her with a small nod before he finished putting the books away and perched on the edge of a desk as Rosella perched on the edge of hers, her hands clutching the edges as she looked over to him, her brow arching as she waited for him to speak to her.

"There's been a sighting of BB-8," Poe said. "Apparently Han Solo is with him along with some kids. He managed to send a message to the General and she wants us to go and retrieve him and BB-8. She said that he is going to transmit his location as soon as possible."

"If she knows where it is then what are the chances of the First Order knowing?" Rosella questioned from him. "You know that they will be listening in to most transmissions. I told the General that they do that."

"She knows," Poe said. "But it is a risk we have to take. We just need to make sure we beat the First Order."

"We?" Rosella arched a brow and Poe nodded.

"I'm leading the mission," he told her. "Don't worry, it should be fairly straightforward….well…I'd have thought it would be. It's a simple retrieving mission."

Rosella rolled her eyes. "No mission is ever simple, especially where you are concerned, Poe Dameron. Just promise me that you will be as careful as you usually are."

"Hey," Poe shot her a rueful smile. "When am I ever anything but careful?"

 _Two years ago_

 _Sitting in the dining area to the chamber, Rosella picked up the glass of water in front of her, sipping on it gently as she looked over its rim to the man across from her. He was silent and brooding, as he always was. He had been in charge of finishing the designs for the new base, but they were not going to plan. Rosella had done her best to be there for him, but he was never interested in her company. He was always interested in work and not her._

 _She preferred it that way, however. She hated any attention that Armitage gave her. It made her feel queasy and she longed for him to get away from her. She hated the feeling of him near her, but he told her that it was necessary if he were to get her with an heir. Little did he know he had already done that._

" _I need to go back to work after dinner," his voice was curt as he tucked into the soup in front of him and Rosella nodded, picking up her spoon and eating slowly._

" _I understand," she told him. "I trust everything is well?"_

" _If I am working out of hours then no, Rosella, everything is not well," he sneered back to her._

" _You are always working out of hours," she responded to him and felt his glare on her face, silently telling her not to test him, despite the fact that she longed to. She enjoyed nothing more than pressing his buttons because she knew then that he had some emotion. He was not this man with nothing inside of him. Perhaps if he had emotions then he could grow to love her one day._

" _Don't," he said, that one word enough to make her keep silent. She may enjoy winding him up, but she did not push him too far._

 _The rest of the meal was spent in silence and Armitage then left her without another word. Sighing, Rosella stood up and tidied up herself before the intercom sounded. Moving over to it, Rosella opened the door to see the doctor stood there, a stern look on her face._

 _Doctor Muska was a middle aged woman, always impeccably dressed in her uniform and always on time. She was not like the others on the base. She was kind and often too caring, especially towards Rosella after she had grown close to the girl and listened to her fear. Maria Muska had been trained as a doctor and recruited to the First Order through no choice of her own. She hated everything they stood for, but when her husband had been threatened, she had joined._

 _She was en expert in most things and renowned for her willingness to carry out complex surgeries._

 _Rosella invited her in, closing the door and then moving to the sofa, sitting on it as Maria sat next to her, sighing as she dropped her head downwards, knowing how this conversation was going to go._

" _I trust you still have not told him?" Maria said and Rosella shook her head, her hand moving to her stomach._

" _I cannot," Rosella whispered. "The thought of telling him makes me feel sick, Maria. You know what he is like. If he has a child…a son, especially…he will turn it into his own mould. I cannot let that happen."_

" _Then what do you intend to do?" Maria asked. "You know I cannot lie to him, Rosella. He expects to see the reports of your cycle soon. If he sees that you are pregnant for them then he will demand for me to tell him why I did not say something sooner. I am expected to report everything to him."_

" _No," Rosella pleaded, her voice on the very of hysteria. "You cannot tell him yet. I just need time…time to decide what to do."_

" _Decide what to do?" Maria echoed. "Rosella, you are married to the General of the First Order. You are carrying his child inside of you. I suspect your options are quite limited."_

" _They cannot be," Rosella repeated. "I cannot get rid of my child, nor can I let him anywhere near it."_

" _Then what?" Maria demanded from Rosella, her voice harsh as she saw Rosella bite down on her bottom lip and a look of wonder passed her face. It was then when Maria shook her head back and forth, knowing what Rosella was thinking. "No, you cannot be serious."_

" _What other choice do I have?" Rosella demanded from her. "I need to escape, Maria. Staying here…I want him to change. I want him to be different, but I know that he never will be. I tried when we first married. I tried to get him to change…to love me…but he is too cold. He is too far gone and power hungry."_

" _And can you imagine what he would do if he found out you were even thinking this?" Maria demanded from Rosella. "If he discovered you were planning to escape then he would…I do not dare think what he would do…"_

" _Nor do I," Rosella promised her. "But escaping has to be better than sitting here and waiting for him to ruin our child."_

 _Maria shook her head slowly, looking to the woman she had hid secrets for. "I have a bad feeling about this, Rosella…but…I suspect I would have an even worse feeling if I let you do this alone."_

 _Rosella moved to embrace Maria tightly then, holding her closely to her as the woman sighed and closed her eyes. Rosella let her go then and looked down to her stomach, wondering how much time she had before Armitage would notice her pregnancy._

Now

Waking up in the middle of the night, Rosella's hand instantly went down to her stomach as she panted for breath, the nightmare coming back to her as she swung her legs over the side of the bed and stood up tall, stretching as Poe stirred besides her.

He opened his eyes, his voice groggy as he managed to spot Rosella stood up and moving towards the bathroom. He sat up too and moved from the bed, following her to make sure she was alright. He came to the bathroom door and saw her stood looking into the mirror, her hands clutching her stomach as he moved closer to her.

"Stomach ache?" he asked of her and she dropped her hands from her stomach and looked at him in the mirror as he came to wrap his arms around her waist.

"Something like that," she whispered, closing her eyes as Poe kissed her on the neck once. Looking back to her reflection, she remained composed as she whispered again. "Something just like that."

…

A/N: Let me know what you think!


	18. Chapter 18

Rosella stood outside of the hanger, not daring to go inside. She knew that once she went in then she would be bidding goodbye to Poe once again. She would be saying goodbye and he would go to retrieve BB-8. She knew that the chances of him meeting the First Order were high. As far as she could gather, they too wanted the location of the final piece of the map that Poe had given to the droid.

She watched as people passed her by, no doubt looking at her as they went. Every time she left the safety of the classroom she could feel people stare at her. She knew how they whispered about her. They wondered if she really could be trusted, especially after her recent brief stint back with the First Order.

No doubt Armitage would do his best to get her back to him. She just didn't want to go back. She couldn't go back to him. She felt sick at the thought of returning to him. If he knew all of the secrets she had hid from him then he would probably kill her for himself. She had been shocked that Ren had not probed her mind deep enough to find out the secret she was doing her best to hide from him. Then again, he had only been searching for what he wanted.

"Rose, what are you doing loitering out here?" Poe's voice took Rosella by surprise as she saw him stood in the doorway, holding the metal door open as he watched her. "Jessica said she saw you on her way in."

"Sorry," Rosella responded, shaking her head to snap her from her daze as she moved forwards and fell into step besides Poe, entering the hanger where all the X-Wings were, final checks being prepared on them. "I just didn't want to come in and see…well…you know…"

Poe tilted his head to the side and watched as she observed the scene, folding her arms over herself as she saw some of the ships being pushed back from the hanger to the runway. Poe sighed softly, one arm moving to wrap around her shoulders as he held her softly by his side, bending down to kiss her on the top of her head.

"Everything will be fine," Poe said. "Besides, I'm the best pilot in the Resistance, how could they not be fine?"

"Don't joke," Rosella urged of him, shaking her head back and forth as he let the smirk fall from his face, seeing the worry eat up on her face. "Poe, you don't know what is going to happen out there. If something goes wrong-"

"-Hey," Poe interrupted before she could continue working herself up. Bending down slightly, he placed a finger under her chin, forcing her gaze gently back to him instead of at the ships she had been staring at. "Everything will be fine, Rose. I promise you. Besides, when have I ever not been honest with you?"

Rosella blinked profusely, looking up to Poe as he spoke those words and she shook her head. She couldn't tell him. She had vowed never to tell anyone what had happened, but Poe was not just anyone. Poe was the man she was madly in love with. Poe deserved the truth. He deserved to know. She had been the one to tell him all of her secrets anyway. She had told him most things except for the thing that still pained her to this day.

"You've always been honest with me, but-"

"-There you go then," Poe interrupted her before she had the chance to speak any further to him. She bit down on her bottom lip, shaking her head back and forth as he went silent and she did her best to think of something to say to him. "I have to go, Rosella, but I should be back by the end of the day."

"Of course," Rosella said, knowing that this was not the moment for her to tell him. Instead she plastered a smile onto her face and moved to kiss him, struggling to care who was watching as he moved his lips against hers for a few brief moments, smirking underneath her mouth.

Pulling back, Poe took a deep breath before kissing her chastely once more, his hand running down her neck. "The Force be good…Rosella…I love you so much."

"Just as I love you," Rosella responded. "Now go before I end up finding a way to keep you here."

Poe smiled at that, kissing her once more and then moving off, his feet pushing against the ground as he jogged to his ship. Rosella went to stand by the doors she had earlier come through, watching as he climbed on board and went to focus on flying. She knew that he would come back. Thinking anything else would drive her to the point of insanity.

 _Two Years Ago_

 _Maria was pacing up and down in front of Rosella. The wife of the General was sat on the leather couch, her head buried in her hands as she kept her eyes closed, her breathing uneven as Maria continued to push her hands through her hair, clearly too stressed at everything that had happened that day. Rosella had tried to talk to the doctor, but the woman was on the verge of hysteria. Rosella knew it was pointless to try and keep calming her down, but she had to try._

" _If he finds out I lied to him…what was I thinking?" Maria snapped and Rosella looked up._

" _You were protecting me," Rosella reminded her and the woman scoffed. "Maria, I know this is difficult-"_

" _-Difficult?" she echoed, interrupting her. "Rosella, this is beyond difficult. This is impossible. He is the General of the First Order. Do you know how sick I felt when he was asking me…asking me how your hormone levels were…if he looked at the results-"_

" _-He didn't," Rosella responded, her voice low and short as she stood up, the black pencil skirt she wore clutching to her thighs. "He didn't find out and he won't because I'm leaving. I'm leaving as soon as he has left the Base."_

" _And do you think he ever will?" Maria wondered._

" _I think he has to," Rosella replied. "I heard him speaking with Ren last night about finishing off the Finalizer. I don't think it will be long before he goes there to check on progress."_

" _And how exactly do you plan on sneaking off?" Maria enquired, folding her arms over her chest. "Rosella, you know as well as I do that this is utter madness. The chances of you escaping his gaze is one thing, but the chance of you escaping this Base is another thing."_

" _There has to be a way," Rosella whispered and Maria shook her head._

" _Well when you find it then let me know," she shrugged. "You're my friend, Rosella. You will always be my friend…"_

" _But?" Rosella asked, sensing there was something more to this conversation that she did not know. Huffing lowly, Maria took hold of Rosella by the arms, her fingers tight around her as she looked her in the eye, desperation oozing from her look._

" _But I have a husband," Maria said. "I have a husband who they could hurt if they knew what I was doing."_

" _They will not know," Rosella told her, moving to take her hands inside of hers. "I will not let him find out. Please, Maria, give me another week. Give me another week and I will find my way out of here."_

 _Maria opened her mouth, preparing to speak, but she said nothing as she heard the door hiss open. Turning her head over her shoulder, Maria dropped Rosella's hands as the other woman moved through the living area and towards the small kitchen._

" _I had not expected you back so soon," Rosella informed her husband and he looked between the two women, eyeing them with caution as they refused to acknowledge each other._

" _I had not thought to be back soon, but I have completed my work for the day," Armitage spoke. "And why are you here, Doctor Muska?"_

" _I had a terrible headache and sent for her," Rosella informed her husband. "I trust that is allowed?"_

 _Armitage hardly appreciated his wife's sharp tongue, but he said nothing. Instead he glowered over to her while Maria nodded her head and grabbed the bag from the sofa, slinging it onto her shoulder while Rosella filled up a glass of water from the tap, listening as Maria left the chamber._

" _Do you forget your manners?" Armitage enquired from his wife. "And why were you not teaching today?"_

" _Do you forget things I just tell you?" Rosella said. "I have had a headache all day. I tried to sleep it off but failed, so I sent for Maria. I do not see why you must question everything I do."_

" _I am your husband," he answered automatically as Rosella sipped her water and watched him from over the rim of the glass. "Your petulant attitude is becoming very childish, Rosella."_

 _She said nothing then, choosing to place the glass down on the side and then move past him, trying to brush by. She failed miserably as she felt his hand on her arm, stopping her from moving while she remained still, trying not to wince as she felt his other hand move to her hair, his fingers working down her hair._

" _The good doctor also informed me that we have failed again this month," Armitage said and Rosella rolled her eyes._

" _Failed?" she asked from him. "This is not some mission, Armitage. A child is serious."_

" _A child is all I require from you," Armitage told her, his voice low and demanding. "However, we shall try again. Perhaps you might feel better after a lie down? Hmm?"_

 _His hand moved down her neck and Rosella kept her gaze on the door in front of her as her husband moved to kiss her on the cheek, his lips caressing her skin as she tried to forget the motion._

" _Perhaps," was all Rosella could say before she wormed out of his hold and went to the bedroom, her stomach churning at the thought of him being close to her once more._

Now

Sitting on the hillside, Rosella waited with patience for the evening until she saw the fleet return. She refused to move until she saw Poe land safely on the ground. She kept her arms around her legs, crushing them against her chest as she waited with patience.

"I see you struggle as I do."

Rosella stood as soon as she heard the General approach her. She straightened out the navy dress she wore and inclined her head. Leia brushed her off, waving her hand as she offered her a slim smile.

"Please, do not go all formal on me," she insisted. "I needed some time away…some time to think."

"Has there been any news, General?"

"Everything went as planned," the General promised her. "I returned with the droid just a few moments ago. Poe should not be far behind. He was checking the planet to be sure of no more threats."

"Good," Rosella said, exhaling a sigh of relief. "And did the First Order make an appearance?"

"They did," Leia said. "And Ben…Kylo Ren took a girl who had been travelling with my husband. I do not know who she is."

"It's alright," Rosella suddenly said. "I know who he is to you and I know how it feels…you want to love someone and they just won't accept it."

Leia observed Rosella and sighed. She had not spoken publicly of her son, far too scared to do so. Instead she kept things about Ben bottled up inside of her, despite the fact that she believed there was still some good inside of him.

"I still have faith in him," Leia declared. "I have to have faith."

"I know," Rosella replied.

"He is my son," Leia said. "How can you turn your back on your child? How can you abandon them, despite what they say? No…I am his mother…I need to bring him back…save him and keep him safe."

Keep him safe. Rosella felt her throat clench as Leia looked to the sky and she turned away. She couldn't do this. She couldn't continue like this. She knew she couldn't. Rosella didn't lie. She couldn't lie. She never wanted to think about what happened again, but why should she bury it?

"Rosella," Leia said, looking to the girl who had suddenly turned pale. "Is everything alright?"

"You said you want to keep him safe," Rosella whispered. "But what kind of a mother doesn't keep their child safe? Make sure nothing happens to them…protects them…"

Leia dared to move a hand to Rosella's arm, her fingers running up and down the girl's skin. "What is it?"

"I couldn't do that," Rosella said, her eyes wet and her lip quivering. "I couldn't keep her safe."

Leia had no idea what that meant as she wrapped her arms around Rosella, pulling the girl to her as she sobbed, her tears falling onto the elder woman's shoulder. Shaking her head, Rosella did her best to compose herself but she failed. She had spoken of it and there was no stopping the emotion she felt now.

She couldn't stop herself as she whispered. "I should have left sooner…got out…I killed her…my little girl…my daughter."

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	19. Chapter 19

Leia had sat down by Rosella's side, her hand moving down her shoulder length hair as she tried to calm the younger woman. They had not moved from the side of the hill, both of them sat close to each other. Rosella had been shaking after what she had just said. She never mentioned her daughter, nor did she ever want to. It was fear that took hold of her. Fear that she would be punished for what had happened.

"You do not need to tell me what happened," Leia whispered once Rosella had wiped her eyes with the backs of her hands, sniffing loudly before wrapping her arms around her legs, curling herself into a tight ball. "I have no right to ask you what happened."

"I tried to bury it," Rosella whispered, looking down to her knees and Leia stilled her hand, allowing it to move to Rosella's back instead, telling her that she was still there. "I tried to push it down…but…I can never forget…never let her be forgotten. She deserved so much better. She deserved something better than a weak and pathetic mother."

"Rosella," Leia let out a soft sight in the girl's name. "I am certain that is not true. I know you…Poe knows you…"

"He had gone," Rosella whispered, shaking her head back and forth. "He had gone and I had my chance, but I…the night before I intended to go…I woke up and it was too late. I was too late."

Leia didn't push her, knowing that there was no use in pushing the girl for the information. It was not her place to pry, but a part of her suspected she knew what she was speaking about. She said nothing for a moment, watching as Rosella closed her eyes, her cheek resting on top of her kneecaps as they heard the familiar noise of X-Wings making their descent to the base.

"That will be Poe," Rosella whispered and Leia nodded.

"Did you want to go to home or stay here?"

"He doesn't know," Rosella picked her head up again, not entirely answering the question Leia had posed to her. "I never told him about her."

"I will say nothing," Leia assured her. "If you decide to tell him then it should be in your own time. You are the one to make that decision."

Nodding, Rosella pushed herself to her feet as Leia did the same. She moved to cradle the girl's cheeks in her hands, wiping the tears from her eyes as she offered her a sad smile. She searched the girl's gaze and wondered just how much she had gone through in her short life already.

"Poe is a good man," Leia whispered. "You know that, Rosella."

"I have told him everything," Rosella said. "But I couldn't say anything about her…and I want to…because he deserves to know. He deserves to know everything and I keep hiding things from him."

"Some things can be very difficult to discuss," Leia informed her, her voice stating the matter of fact and Rosella scoffed, but nodded her head in agreement as Leia dropped her from her grip. "Your daughter…whatever happened to her, I am certain it was not your fault. There is no bad bone in your body."

"I miscarried," Rosella blurted out, unsure why she was telling Leia this information. "I miscarried while Armitage was gone and no one knew…no one but me and the doctor…I…she said it wasn't my fault. She said that I had been under pressure…that there was nothing I could have done."

Nodding in agreement, Leia took the girl by the shoulder. "I am certain she was right," Leia said.

"No," Rosella said. "I should have left him as soon as-"

"-There you are!"

Rosella didn't have a chance to finish as she saw Poe moving up the hill, still wearing his orange pilot suit, minus the equipment that came with it. The smile fell from his face as soon as he saw the General and Rosella's red, puffy face. Moving with haste, Poe took hold of Rosella by the hand, looking her in the eye as his hand came to her cheek.

"What is it?" Poe asked, his voice a mixture of worry and tenderness. "What has happened?"

"Nothing," Rosella shook her head.

"Then why do you look like you've been crying for hours?" Poe demanded from her and then looked to the General, wondering if she could shed any light on the situation. She seemed to offer him a small nod but she said nothing else as she made her leave and Rosella moved to wrap her arms around Poe's neck, holding him tightly as he took her by the waist.

"Talk to me, Rose," Poe whispered, his tone now pleading.

"Don't hate me," she whispered, her breath hot against his ear. "Please, Poe, just don't hate me."

"I can never hate you," Poe promised, pulling back with a small smile, his hand going to her chin as he tried to reassure her. "Rosella, nothing could make me hate you."

"I should have told you," she whispered, her tone low and gentle. "I should have told you when I told you everything else, but it…I couldn't speak it…I didn't want to speak it…you need to understand that."

"Whatever it is-"

"-I had a daughter," Rosella interrupted him, unable to stop herself as she slowly slipped from his grip and down to the floor again. Poe remained still, his eyes wide as he came to terms with that revelation. He moved too, slipping down to the floor and resting an arm behind her to support himself.

"I…no one knew," Rosella continued. "I only told the doctor and I made her promise not to tell Armitage. I had no intention of him knowing. I intended to flee and get away from him and protect her. If he got his hands on her then I have no idea what he would have done. You know what he was like…is like…"

"I know," Poe said as he heard the desperation in her voice.

She still couldn't look at him, instead she chose to keep her gaze in front of her, her eyes narrow and her hands shaking in her lap. "I wanted to run," she whispered. "I planned everything. He had gone and I knew the perfect time to go…every so often they would lower their shields to check they were working. I could steal a ship and sneak off then…without them detecting me…but…it was the night before when I lost her."

Poe took a moment to understand what she was saying, but he soon understood as he saw her bury her face into her hands, her body wracking with sobs as she sobbed uncontrollably. Poe did move then, kneeling before her and awkwardly pulling her body against his, the grip he had on her tight and unrelenting.

"That is not your fault," Poe told her, voice harsh and stern as he tried to make her see. "Do you understand me, Rosella? What happened was not your fault-"

"-It was my body," she interrupted him, voice on the verge of hysteria. "It was my body that betrayed her. I should have done more…gotten away sooner…done more."

"Stop it," Poe demanded from her, his voice demanding as he took hold of her by the shoulders. "Everything that happened to you was not your fault. You did everything you could and what happened was an accident of no one's fault. If you keep blaming yourself…talking like this…Rose…" Poe didn't know what to say to her. He had already seen her go down a slippery slope before. He didn't want to see it again.

"I just feel guilt," Rosella said in a low voice. "All I feel is guilt."

"I understand," Poe mumbled, "but you shouldn't. Listen to me, that little girl would not want you to feel like this. She…she would know that it was not your fault, just as everyone else does."

"I'm sorry," Rosella whispered to Poe. "I know that I should have told you. I know that…you deserved to know. You've done nothing but tell me the truth and I just keep lying to you and hiding things."

"No," Poe shook his head at her, his voice tender and soft as his hand moved to cup her cheek, a sad smile on his face as his thumb roamed her cheekbone. "You have nothing to apologise for. I…I understand, Rosella. You buried it deep down because it hurt too much. I understand that."

"I was going to call her Lucilia," Rosella informed him, looking him in the eye. "After my mother."

"And you still can call her that," Poe responded, his tone still soft. "Because you never need to forget her. You shouldn't forget her because she was still a part of you."

Moving to take Poe's wrist, she pulled his hand from her cheek and held it inside of her hand. Closing her eyes, she let a feeling of relief slowly wash over her body at his words as she moved to press her forehead against his, her cheeks still red and slightly wet as she moved to kiss him on the cheek.

"Thank you," she said in a small voice. "Poe, thank you."

"You never need to thank me," Poe promised her. "Because I'll always be here, despite anything that happens."

…

Sitting on Poe's bed with a cup of water in her hands, Rosella crossed her legs as Poe changed into his normal attire and out of his pilot's uniform. Ever since her revelation, the pair of them had sat on the top of that hill for the rest of the day, simply talking things through and Poe had done his best to keep Rosella from crying. He had seen a change in her ever since she arrived from the First Order, but there were times when he saw her regressing.

He could see her go back to that place and he knew what she was thinking, especially now she had told him everything. She had promised him that there was nothing else for him to know. She had sworn to him that there were no more secrets, but she had also told him that no one else knew. Armitage had never discovered. Her doctor had said nothing to him and no one else had found out.

"BB-8 was with this girl and Finn," Poe informed her and Rosella let her eyes widen.

"Finn?" she asked of him. "How is he?"

"He's fine," Poe chuckled. "Better than fine actually. He wants to join us here."

"But he's just a kid," Rosella said nervously for him, remembering what he had done for them. He had risked himself to save them and not just himself. He had been selfless. "What will he be doing?"

"Well," Poe sighed, slipping down onto the bed, his hands resting on his knees. "The girl…Rey…she was taken by the First Order. They think she knows where the map to Skywalker is because she's seen it, so we need to get her out of there soon enough. Finn wants to go and help."

"How?" Rosella wondered, sipping on her water. "Poe, that base is a maze of corridors and buildings…each one manned by at least two or three stormtroopers. We only escaped because we were disguised."

"I know," Poe told her. "But we're coming up with a plan. One that involves destroying that killing weapon once and for all."

"Armitage will be on high alert," Rosella said, her mind racing as she pushed herself to her feet and wandered through the bedroom, placing the cup down on his dresser as she dropped her hands to her hips. "I mean, the shields on that thing are the best, as you would expect. Even landing undetected would be difficult…well…unless you landed away from the actual building on it…"

"Where is that?"

"It's covered in nothing but snow and trees. You'd need to fly in undetected and land amongst the trees to stay hidden," Rosella said. "It's almost like a suicide mission."

"Well, we might not have much of a choice," Poe told her. "I'm hearing rumours that they're powering up that weapon to fire on us."

"I'm surprised they haven't done that sooner."

Poe had expected her to be shocked, but she was calm as she looked to Poe, arching a brow in his direction after she had spoken. Shrugging, Poe agreed with her. They had known about their location for some time now, he supposed. It would make sense that they attack now. Saying nothing more on the matter, Poe stood up too and pulled at his leather jacket.

"How much do you know about Starkiller Base?" he asked of her and she shrugged.

"Bits," she said. "Armitage used to bring work back to our chamber and I used to hear some of his conversations. Why?"

"Because you're the only one here…along with Finn…who knows anything about that thing."

"Do you think I could help?" Rosella asked and Poe shrugged.

"I guess we might just find out soon enough."

…

A/N: Thanks so much to everyone reading and reviewing, it means a lot to me! Do leave me a quick comment to let me know what you think/any suggestions!


	20. Chapter 20

Rosella could barely contain herself as soon as she saw Finn. He was stood in the control room next to Han Solo, a man who Rosella had considered to be a myth until she had seen him in the flesh. She could feel people watching her as she moved to wrap her arms around Finn's neck, a smile on her face as Poe chuckled, standing behind her as Finn tentatively held her back.

"I'm so glad you survived," Rosella said, pulling back to look to him. "After what you did for us…"

"I only did it because of what you said," Finn admitted, looking her in the eye as she moved a hand to pat his shoulder. "I had been thinking about it for a while…but without you…what you told me…I don't know if I would have been brave enough."

Rosella smiled sadly, confidently squeezing his shoulder. "I think you would have."

They went quiet then as Leia entered the room, commanding attention as her husband followed her movements, unable to take his eyes from her. They stood around the large round table as Rosella took a spot next to Poe, letting the pilot move to rest a hand on her back while his other hand sat on top of the table where the hologram rose.

"It's another Death Star."

Poe sighed then, pressing some buttons on the table, his orange jacket bunching up as he leant forwards slightly.

"If only that were the case," he spoke. "This is the Death Star…" he motioned to the hologram already showing.

"And this is the Starkiller Base." He showed the next hologram, dwarfing the first one.

There were collective gasps around the table. Rosella looked at the layout of Starkiller base as did Finn, both of them peering at it with wonder before looking to each other. She had no doubt that Finn knew just as much as she possibly did. Besides, her husband had no time to fill her in the plans of the base. She only knew what she overheard, but she knew that she could point something of use out.

"How is it possible to power that thing?"

"It uses the power of the sun," Finn said and Black Squadron all turned to look at him and Rosella had to admit she had only just noticed the presence of Wexley, Pava and Kun.

"The weapon charges and drains the sun," Rosella said, her voice soft and low as Poe turned to look down to her. "It…stopping it is almost impossible. I mean…there's something in it…a core of some kind."

"Precinct 47," Finn said, clarifying on what Rosella had just said to him as he moved around them and the hologram, looking for what he had just said. He pointed to it and it lit up, showing it. "It is an oscillator to help stabilise the core…destroy that and you could help to slow the weapon down, even stop it."

"But getting into it will be tricky," Rosella answered and Poe arched a brow as she slowly began to speak up, gathering her confidence in the room full of Resistance commanders. She moved to stand next to Finn, motioning to hologram too, a sphere showing up around the Base, acting as a shield. "The shield is one of the most advanced in the galaxy. It's built to detect anything and stop weapons from firing on it."

"I can deal with that," Han Solo spoke up and Rosella dared to look over to him as he nodded, a wookie by his side that she had heard was called Chewbacca. Nodding, Rosella moved around the hologram again, pointing to something.

"There an outbuilding," she said. "When they designed the shields they had to build another building just for them and to harness the energy. Even if you do get in then that building is surrounded by stormtroopers."

"But we can sneak past them," Finn said and she shrugged.

"Maybe," she agreed with him. "But as soon as something flies even close to the Base then they will be on you in a matter of moments. And then Armitage…" she trailed off and she swore she heard people begin to whisper before she corrected herself, looking down for a moment. "General Hux will be all over it and send extra troops to stop you from doing any real damage."

"Then we need to distract them," Finn said and Rosella nodded in agreement.

"Or we need to be sneaky enough for them not to notice us," Han replied.

"Perhaps," Rosella said. "But if you aren't sneaky enough then there is no way of destroying the weapon. Its core might be up there," she pointed to it, "but the crucial part is down here."

"So what do you suggest?" Han asked and then Rosella realised they were all looking to her and she didn't know how to answer them. She didn't know how she could be of any hope. All she could do was think, but those thoughts all led to one thing.

"I will talk to him," Rosella said. "Let me talk-"

"-No," Poe was the one to interrupt and he took hold of her. Despite the fact that Rosella had not told anyone of her husband, people were not foolish. People already had their inclinations that she was the wife who had now eluded him twice.

Dragging her away from the crowd and into a corner, Poe moved to take her by the shoulders, looking her in the eye as she moved her hands to wrap softly around his forearms and she nodded, looking determinedly at him.

"You know it is the only way," she said, voice low and harsh. "Poe, if I can talk to him and distract him from business…make it so that people won't disturb him…it might buy some time."

"It will hardly buy us any more time," Poe told her. "As soon as you speak to him and someone notifies him that something is wrong then he will be all over it. Besides, if they cannot reach him then they will just get someone else…"

"He is the one in charge," Rosella said. "He makes the decisions. People are too scared of him to make decisions in his place. Listen to me, if I talk to him…stall him…they will be too preoccupied with that on the bridge to notice anything else for a short time. They will be too busy eavesdropping into his conversation to pay attention to their jobs. I know them...I know how they work. The General's private life is a mystery and everyone loves a mystery."

"I don't want you to see him," Poe whispered as people began speaking behind them, discussing a plan of attack. "After what he did I swore to myself I would never let him get near you…be near you…"

Offering a sad smile, Rosella moved her hands along his arms, cupping his neck gently. "I want to help," she whispered. "I might not be able to come aboard an X-wing with you…or shoot at the target…but this is what I can do. This is what I need to do. Besides, I will only be seeing him on a screen...he won't get me."

Poe searched her gaze and found himself nodding, knowing that was not what he wanted to do. He wanted to go and hide her and keep her safe, but she was her own person. She had her own way of doing things. Who was Poe to keep her from helping? He might be…well…he didn't know how to define his relationship with Rosella. He might love her and be with her, but he did not control her.

"General," Rosella called out, turning the conversation in her direction as she kept on staring at Poe, her gaze even and silently telling him that she would be fine. "Put me in contact with General Hux. I can try to stall him…give them a chance to sneak in the building before the bridge realises something is wrong."

"You're certain?" Leia asked, the conversation she had with the girl still fresh in her mind.

Nodding, Rosella turned to look Leia in the eye. "Positive."

"Then let's go," Leia spoke.

Shaking his head, Poe looked down to the ground, a smirk on his face as he heard everyone begin to scurry around, no doubt rushing to prepare the ships. He took hold of Rosella by the waist then, bending down until his lips pressed against hers and she moved to wrap her hands into his hair, pulling him tightly against her as people passed them by.

"Come back in one piece, Poe Dameron," she said, voice low and demanding as Poe chuckled.

"Just for you," he told her. "Rose…you know…you know I-"

"-No," she said, putting a finger to his lips to silence him. "You can tell me that when you come back here after destroying that weapon. You save it for then."

Bending down once again, Poe kissed her before rushing off, knowing that if he stood there for much longer he would be tempted not to go and help to rest of his squadron. Rosella watched him go before turning around and seeing Leia stood over the plans. Moving tentatively over to her, she saw her look down for a moment.

"This is dangerous," she spoke.

"The First Order are," Rosella said, biting down on her lip before she put her hands behind her back, the black dress she wore pulling against her figure as she pushed her hair behind her ear. "General, you need to know that if you destroy Starkiller Base…the First Order…they have contingencies."

"What kind of contingencies?" Leia wondered, looking to Rosella who nervously glanced to the ceiling.

"Other bases," she spoke in a low voice. "I do not know where they are or what they are. I heard Armitage say that they were nowhere near as powerful as the Base, but they still had power behind them. I just don't think that this will be the end if we destroy the Base."

Leia chuckled. "It never is, Rosella. It never is."

…

Standing by the table, Rosella looked on, waiting for him to appear in hologram form before her. Leia was stood over her shoulder but out of sight so that the hovering camera only showed Rosella. She was nervous, sweating profusely and trying to hide it by wiping a hand over her forehead. It took a couple of moments before he finally appeared, the hustle and bustle of the bridge behind him.

"Rosella…"

He sounded shocked to see her. Clearly he had thought that Leia would be the one to make contact after accepting a transmission with D'Qar.

"Armitage," she responded. "I know what you intend to do to D'Qar."

"Yes," Armitage said, his voice haughty as Rosella resisted the urge to roll her eyes at his manner. "Well, you should not be shocked, Rosella. I have known about the Rebel's location for some time thanks to you."

"But why?" Rosella asked. "You know that the Resistance has others outside of this system. Do you intend to blow all of them up?"

"Perhaps," he sneered at her. "I do not see why it is any of your business, _sweet wife._ " He hissed at her then and Rosella wanted to recoil. "What is it you want, anyway? Should you not be off holding onto that pilot of yours?"

"No," Rosella responded. "I should not even be speaking to you…if the others knew…"

Leia arched a brow, wondering what was happening as everyone stayed out of view. They watched on with wonder as the General looked intently at his wife who had bowed her head and was letting tears roll down her cheek, falling onto the table.

"I know what I did was wrong," Rosella said, looking up to him. "I know I should have been better to you, Armitage. I should have stood by your side-"

"-What do you want?" Armitage demanded from her. "I am not buying this act, Rosella. You-"

"-I don't want to die!" Rosella wailed then, her voice high pitched as she slammed her fists on the table. "I know that weapon of yours would kill us and I don't want to die, Armitage. I would do anything…come back to you…I would do whatever you asked."

Armitage weighed up her words, his image blurring slightly for a moment as she panted for breath, wondering if Han and Finn were on the base yet. She hoped they wouldn't be long. They couldn't be long because she could only hold the attention of Armitage for long enough. She knew everyone else on the bridge would be listening in, peering at the big screen in the centre of the room and neglecting their work.

"Armitage," she whispered his name. "Please…I know I have wronged you…but you have wronged me too…you know that."

He looked away then, a tick in his jaw as he heard her speak and she knew she was getting somewhere very slowly with him. He even looked as though she was speaking sense. Perhaps he did feel some regret for what he had done to her? She didn't know, but she kept on speaking.

"We can work through this," she informed him. "Poe…he…he means nothing to me."

"Not willing to die for him now?" Armitage asked.

"No," she said. "I thought I could, but I can't. I just want to live and I want to make it work between us."

"You're using me."

"No," Rosella said. "No, I am not, Armitage."

"Yes, you are, Rosella," Armitage spoke. "You may be my wife but you have done nothing but use me and insult me, just like you do by appearing before me now. What did I do to deserve a wench like you as a wife?"

"Do not act like you were perfect," Rosella snapped at him. "Perhaps if you had been kinder to me then I would not resent you! Perhaps if you have loved me then we could have done this…we could have made it work…"

"My job was not to love you."

"I am your wife!" Rosella yelled at him, leaning forwards as her hair fell in her face and stuck there with thanks to her tears. "A husband and a wife are supposed to love each other! Was that too much to ask? Was loving me so difficult for you?"

"No!" he yelled at her and she slowly saw his composure slip away, his leather-gloved hands clenching into fists on the table as he peered at her. "I wanted to love you. I wanted to adore you…but you pushed me away. You pushed me away and never did as I asked. You made things so difficult."

Rosella was startled then as a laugh escaped him and he shook his head.

"But it is too late," he told her and she shook her head.

"It's not," she said to him.

"Yes, it is," Armitage said. "Because this is not the beginning of our marriage. You are not the meek young woman I married. You've changed…become one of them…and there is only-"

"-General Hux!" a voice yelled in the background. "It's the shields…they're down…somehow…"

Rosella heard the chaos begin and Armitage turned back to her, looking at her with wide eyes before he sneered.

"You tried to distract me," he snapped and Rosella shrugged.

"Goodbye, Armitage," was all she said before ending the transmission and she felt a hand on her shoulder.

Leia stood there as Rosella bent over the table, collecting her thoughts after that conversation. She didn't know what to think. He wanted to love her. He said he wanted to love her.

"Good job, Rose," Leia said and then swept away to joint he rest of the commotion while Rosella remained where she was, wondering just what had happened.

…

A/N: Thanks to anyone reading. Please do let me know what you think!


	21. Chapter 21

Rosella had waited with bated breath in the control room, listening to Black Squadron over the crackly transmission. She could hear Poe's voice often, telling his squad what needed to be done. The shields were down and that should make their job easier. But if that thing exploded then they couldn't waste much time before it destroyed everything.

There had been a time when Rosella had seen the General bend slightly, hand on her stomach, almost as though she felt something inside of her. Rosella had not asked her what the matter was, sensing that she would not get an answer anyway. Leia had gone back to work moments after, taking control and demanding progress reports.

Rosella had let her mind go back to what Armitage had just said to her. She was still struggling to understand what she had heard from him. It made no sense. There had been a time, at the start of their marriage, when he had been amicable. But he had never loved her, not like how Poe loved her. He had never felt that and she was certain of it, regardless of what he said to her.

But if Armitage did not get off of Starkiller Base then that was it. He would be dead. He would be gone. Rosella did not know how she felt about that. Had Armitage shed tears when he discovered his wife had, supposedly, died? She doubted it. She imagined that he had gotten back to work within ten minutes.

 _Six years ago_

 _She had been married to Armitage for two months and everything was not harmonious. They were stranded on some unknown planet as he planned for the return of the Empire in the form of the First Order. She had seen him hunched over blueprints in the evening, his shoulders heavy and his hair tousled._

" _What is it you are looking at?" she asked of him, coming to stand by his side._

 _Arching a brow, Armitage peered across to his wife, looking at her before his eyes went back to the plans on the table. He was still a young man, determined to do the best job possible of taking down the Republic and everything that it stood for._

" _Our new base," Armitage said and Rosella had been shocked that he had not snapped and dismissed her like he usually did. Instead he moved a hand over the plans. "It will be…almost…seven to ten times larger than the Death Star and more powerful. Once we have it built then nothing will stop us."_

 _Rosella was uneasy with what she was hearing as she looked at the drawings and frowned, letting Armitage pick a pen up from the side and write something on it, his writing almost incomprehensible._

" _Will it not be difficult to hide?" Rosella enquired. "If it is so large and the Republic discover what you are doing then will they not destroy it?"_

 _He sneered. "The Republic do not see us a threat. My father informed me earlier today that they do not think we have the numbers to cause another war. Little do they know how we hide in the shadows until we are strong enough to come back."_

 _She nodded and bit down on her lip before feeling his hand on the small of her back. She didn't stiffen at the feeling of his touch. Instead she let him run his hand up and down the space as she looked to the drawings._

" _Father has requested we dine with him tonight," he mumbled to her. "I tried to escape, but he…well…you know how he is."_

 _Rosella wanted to moan, but she held her tongue. She moved to peck her husband on the cheek before insisting she had to change before they went to dinner. Slipping into a green dress, Rosella brushed her hair with haste, pushing it behind her ears before returning to her husband._

 _The base they lived on was home to the soldiers they were recruiting, but they lived in a separate quarter, away from them. Hux had made sure of that. It was all very clinical, nothing homely about it. The worktops were steel and the floors a shiny concrete. It was cold and made everyone in it feel the same way._

 _Dinner with Brendol Hux did not fill Rosella with joy. She did her best not to think of it as they entered the man's chambers to find him already sat at the steel table, the lights dimmed and the food laid out ready. Brendol did not stand when they entered the room, nor did he make eye contact. Armitage pulled out a chair between his father and the spare chair, allowing Rosella to sit down._

" _I trust the plans are coming along nicely?" Brendol demanded from his son. No time for pleasantries then._

 _Rosella took a sip of her water as Armitage answered._

" _Well enough," Armitage responded._

" _What is that supposed to mean?" Brendol demanded, shovelling a forkful of salad into his mouth as Rosella picked up her knife and fork and kept her eyes on her plate. "You know that we need this weapon built before the year ends."_

" _And it will be," Armitage said, also beginning to eat as he began to sweat in the black jumper he wore tucked into his black trousers. "I want to make sure everything is perfect. No detail is to be missing."_

" _You always have been slow, even as a child," Brendol said and Rosella almost winced at the tone._

 _Looking across to Armitage, she saw that there was some form of tick in his jaw as he chewed on his salad and remained mute. He said nothing further, but Rosella could see something inside of him change. He was always different around his father. If anyone else spoke to him like Brendol did then he would either lock them up or cast them out. But Brendol got away with it._

" _I am thorough," he finally settled on saying._

" _Weak, more like it," Brendol muttered and Armitage lowered his knife and fork and looked over to the young man. "I still don't understand how you were picked to lead them…it should have been me."_

" _Well, it was me," Armitage said, his voice even as Rosella felt her appetite leave her. "It was me who was chosen."_

" _Only because I made you what you are-"_

" _-How?" Armitage demanded. "You constantly belittle me and call me pathetic…weak…yes, you made all of these things and I do not deny it. But I rose up from your shadow and I only allow you to stay here out of courtesy due to the fact I have to call you my father."_

 _Brendol began to shake then, his fist banging down on the table as Rosella jumped back in her chair, unable to look at the two arguing men as she finally quit with her meal, realising there was no chance of eating now. Brendol stood up and pointed to his son, his finger still shaking._

" _If those people had not come along and done this…made you the General…then you would still be nothing, son, do you understand me? You are fortunate you had someone to fight your battles."_

" _I need no one to fight my battles," Armitage then stood and moved from behind the table, holding his hand down to his wife. Rosella quickly slipped her hand into his, pulling herself up from the table. But Armitage didn't let go. He kept his fingers around hers, his grip slightly too tight as he let his glower remain on his father._

" _You will do well to remember that I am in charge now," he said in a dangerous tone. "You are nothing but a relic, father, a relic no one wants."_

" _You stupid boy!" Brendol snapped. "Do you think that you will be strong enough to lead this revolution? You are spineless, Armitage. You always have been. You couldn't even pick a decent wife. You married the first woman thrown at you."_

" _Enough!" Armitage snapped, Rosella swearing that he was going to break her hand as he took his turn to point at his father. "You do not speak about my wife in such a manner."_

" _Why?" Brendol wondered. "You make a good pair. Look at her; she cannot even defend herself."_

" _Stop," Armitage demanded, shaking his head. "I do not need to listen to you. There might have been a time when you could beat me into submission, father, but that time has long gone."_

 _Feeling her stomach clench at those words, Rosella swore she saw Armitage's forehead throb as his cheeks reddened and he turned on his heel and dragged his wife with him. Storming back to his own chambers, Armitage punched in the code to open the door and then he locked it. His hand left Rosella's as she looked over to him, his forehead pressed against the door as his hands held his body upright, resting either side of the door._

" _He beat you?" Rosella said in a small voice._

" _I was a child," Armitage whispered._

" _It was still wrong," Rosella told him, holding her hands in front of her. "Your father should never have done that."_

" _It matters not," Armitage said, straightening up and turning to look to Rosella. "I am now stronger and more capable than he ever was. I will not disgrace the name Hux like he did when the Empire fell."_

" _Armitage-"_

" _-I do not wish to talk of it," Armitage interrupted her, refusing to let her show him any sympathy. Sympathy was a sign of weakness and he did not need that from her. He did not need to cry in front of her and show him that he was affected._

 _Moving to the bedroom door, he saw the look in his wife's eye and saw the upset there. Sighing, he stood by her side, moving his hand to run down her arm before his fingers found hers and he looked down to the contact, knowing how strange it felt but ignoring that feeling. This was what he wanted. This was what he needed._

" _He was wrong about you," he offered Rosella. "I chose you because of…many reasons."_

 _He did not clarify those reasons, instead he bent down to peck her on the cheek and he wondered if she relished the feeling as much as he did as he let his lips linger against her skin. He moved his other to cup her cheek, holding it tenderly in his long, spindly fingers._

" _Thank you," Rosella said to him and he nodded curtly before dropping her hand and moving to the bedroom._

Now

It was with nerves that Rosella found herself stood outside the base, waiting on the hill she and Poe always went to. Looking to the sky, she could see the ships returning to the planet, no doubt cheering with joy as the Starkiller Base erupted above them. Rosella had watched the planet blow up and a part of her had felt ill at the sight of it. Her hands had flown to her mouth and she knew she was not supposed to feel this way. She was supposed to be overjoyed. He was going to blow up D'Qar. He was going to kill everyone. He had killed so many already. She should not let a tear fall down her cheek for him, despite what he had just admitted to her.

He could have loved her. He had said that. He wanted to love her. Perhaps it could have been so different. She could have changed him and stopped all of this death and destruction. If she had done that then how many lives would she have saved? There had been times when he had let his guard down around her. Perhaps she should have taken an advantage of that? Perhaps things would be different.

But that would have meant that she would never have found Poe and she loved him. She loved him more than Armitage and she knew that. But perhaps she could have loved Armitage just as much if things had been different. She didn't know. All she knew was that she felt relief when she saw Poe rushing up the hill towards her, but a sombre look held his gaze.

"What is it?" Rosella asked, sweeping her thoughts aside as she moved to him and he shook his head.

"Finn," he spoke. "He came back in a bad way. Kylo Ren…he…he hurt him. He's being treated right now."

"No," Rosella said.

"And that's not it," Poe said. "Ren killed Han Solo."

"His own father?" Rosella bellowed and Poe shrugged.

"He doesn't see him as a father," he spoke. "The General is with Cheewie and Rey. Everyone else is celebrating. It just doesn't feel right to celebrate."

"I know," Rosella ran a hand down his arm.

"Apparently a lot of people on board Starkiller Base managed to evacuate," Poe informed her. "All the children were saved and…well…rumour has it that the General also got off."

Poe looked for any response from Rosella, but she was stoic. Instead she managed a nod before she felt her hands go to Poe's upper arms, holding them softly as he moved to step closer to her, kissing her on the forehead.

"I'm just glad you go back safe," she whispered. "But if he escaped then this isn't the end, Poe…they will come back."

"I know," Poe whispered to her, his hands going to her waist. "I know."

They remained stood there until the sun slowly set, both of them just marvelling in being each other's company. That would be enough for them for the time being. They were both safe and that was all that mattered now.

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think! Not sure if many people are reading but it would mean a lot to let me know if you are!


	22. Chapter 22

Sitting by the pod that Finn had been put into, Rosella let her hand move over to sit on top of the glass. The pod was something quite complex, but she had been informed that Finn's injuries were bad. His back was covered in deep cuts and Finn had been put to sleep in the pod until they healed. Rosella had gone to sit by his side, knowing that there was nothing she could do, but she felt as though she should be there by his side.

Frowning, Rosella wondered how someone could do this to someone else, but she knew it was possible. She knew of the things that Armitage ordered his stormtroopers to do. She had heard the horrors. Shaking her head slowly, her eyes remained on Finn as she felt a hand on her back.

Poe stood behind Rosella, looking down onto Finn as the young man kept his eyes closed, clearly unaware of what was going on around him. He liked the young man. How could he not? He had been brave. He had been selfless. He had rescued Poe and Rosella from a fate of pain.

"Is he going to be okay?" Rosella asked, not looking up to Poe as her eyes went towards the screen on the pod that monitored Finn's vitals. Everything seemed calm.

"The nurses said he should be," Poe whispered down to her. "It might take a while, but he will just have scars."

"At least he can live with those," Rosella said. "I feel so horrible, Poe…I was the one who told them about that building…I…I told them."

"Rose," Poe whispered, moving to bend in front of the chair she sat in, his arms resting over her thighs as he folded them there. Rosella looked down to him, bending down until her forehead met with his and he smiled gently, his breath warm as he moved to push her hair behind her ear.

"If we didn't know about that building then we wouldn't be here," Poe informed her. "That weapon would have destroyed us and we couldn't have that…so many people dead…Finn…Han…they would not have sat back and done nothing. They would not change the decision they made. You did the right thing by helping."

"I know," Rosella assured him, her voice a whisper. "That still doesn't take away the feeling of guilt I have."

"The General wouldn't want you to feel guilty," he assured her, moving to kiss her on the cheek. "I don't want you to feel guilty."

She managed a small smile at hearing him, her lips rising upwards as Poe moved again to kiss her on the lips this time, his hand moving to linger by her cheek as he felt her hand go on top of his. Pulling his fingers through hers, she moved to kiss the back of his hand and stare at him for a second.

"I have never been as happy to see you as I was when you got back," she informed him in a small voice so as not to disturb anyone else in the room. "I know things will still be dangerous…but for now…I'm just happy you're here. You know that, right?"

"I know," Poe said, his smile genuine but a look of concern behind his eyes as he listened to her with intrigue and wondered what was going on in her mind. "I know, Rose."

"And I do love you," Rosella said. "Just always believe that."

"Hey," Poe said, moving to take hold of her hand. He hauled her to her feet and wrapped an arm around her waist, guiding her to the corridor outside of the makeshift hospital wing.

Poe continued to walk by her side until they were outside on the runway. The X-wings were all there, but they were not moving nor was anyone working on them. People were still celebrating and the General had demanded that everyone was to take three days away from work to recover. She had gone into hiding for the day, unable to think of anything but her husband.

Standing by the control panel next to a ship, Poe looked to Rosella as she tugged her hand through her hair. She said nothing, choosing to keep silent as her mind whirled and she wondered if she should tell him what she was thinking of. She didn't know if he would understand. She knew he might not understand, but that still didn't stop her worrying.

"It's Armitage," Rosella admitted, looking to Poe. "When I was distracting him…he said something…and I cannot shake it."

"What?" Poe asked, folding his arms and crumpling his white shirt that he wore.

"He said that he wanted to love me," Rosella said. "I asked him if I was so difficult to love and he said I wasn't…I mean…I know it doesn't change anything. I just can't stop thinking about what would have happened if I had been there at the start of our marriage and tried to change him…stop him before power got to his head."

"Why are you talking like this?" Poe asked and Rosella knew she should have kept quiet.

"Because I can't help it," Rosella shrugged. "I can't help but wonder that I might have been able to change him…stop him from doing all of this things to those people."

"He's a monster," Poe answered and Rosella felt her eyes widen as Poe shrugged at her, his arms still folded defensively over his chest as he spoke. "You cannot change monsters, Rosella. People make their own decisions. You had nothing to do with him. Why do you waste your time thinking of him?"

Rosella remained mute. She could feel annoyance take over her. Poe didn't know. He didn't understand. All that he knew was that she had a scar down her back that was because of Armitage. All he knew was that she had miscarried her child because she had been too scared of telling her husband she was pregnant. He knew how she had been forced to teach scared children of the same things that terrified her.

He saw Armitage as a monster.

He didn't see the Armitage who had been just a lowly General in charge of a few hundred troops. He didn't see the Armitage who had once been so scared of his father that he didn't dare speak. He didn't see the Armitage who had actually conversed with Rosella like she was his equal, despite the fact he had never been warm or tender with his words.

"Because…because there had been a time when I wanted him to be my husband," Rosella said in a low voice. "There had been a time when I wanted him to love me."

"And he never did," Poe said, flapping his arms by his side. "He never loved you and I stand here and I tell you that I would do anything for you…I would do anything to keep you safe…and I love you…unconditionally…but it feels as though that's not enough, Rosella."

"It is!" Rosella snapped, moving to Poe and placing her hand on his arm. "Poe, that is more than enough. It always has been and it always will be. I just…I promised not to hide anything from you."

"And I know how difficult that was for you," Poe nodded at her. "But that still doesn't mean that you should care about Hux."

"I don't care about him like I do you," Rosella promised him. "Not now…what I am trying to say is that…just listening to him admit that he maybe did love me…well…it just made me feel guilty…like I was the one who abandoned him and let him become the man he is today."

Poe tried his best to understand. He tried to understand how she was feeling, but he was struggling miserably. The truth was that he didn't entirely understand. But he was going to try to. He understood that Rosella was complex. He knew that from the first time he had seen her, but he thought that she had changed. He thought that she had grown from the scared woman he had first met. And she had changed. She was a different person, but she still had those same feelings.

"He made his own choice," Poe finally settled on saying, having no interest of arguing with Rosella on the matter. That wasn't what he wanted to do. He didn't want to argue. "Rosella, Hux made the decision to do what he did. You cannot change someone's mind when he is like that."

"I know," Rosella said, squinting as she closed her eyes harshly. "I know that, Poe, but it doesn't stop me thinking."

"I gathered," Poe scoffed at her and she looked to the sky before the pilot sighed, letting out a deep breath and moving to take hold of Rosella, pulling her into his arms before she had a chance to protest at the movement. "Listen to me, Rose, if your love wasn't enough for him then that is his problem. Do you hear me?"

"I'm not sure I even loved him," Rosella admitted, scoffing as she let her cheek rest just beneath Poe's shoulder. "I wanted to…but…I never felt…I know that I love you. I never had that feeling for him."

Poe squeezed her tighter at hearing that, taking a deep breath and gulping. The pilot ran a hand down her back before letting it dip into the small space there, making sure she couldn't move from against him as her arms wrapped around his waist.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I should never have brought it up."

"No," Poe shook his head, burying his cheek into her hair. "You should have brought it up and I'm glad you did. I don't want you to have to hide things from me…never…"

"Thank you," Rosella mumbled, the gratitude heartfelt as Poe kissed the top of her head, letting himself inhale the scent of her hair before he wondered what he would do if she had never landed on D'Qar. That wasn't worth thinking about.

…

"Do you know where she is?"

Rosella didn't know if she belonged in the control room. She had finished teaching for the day and had found herself with Poe in the control room once more. They were peering up at a map above the round table, a cross bleeping and indicating where Rey was. Leia saw that she had landed on the planet where her brother was hiding out and she was grateful that she had arrived safely.

They were just waiting for her to come back to them and tell them that Luke was there. Leia had wondered what might happen if her brother was not found to be there. She suspected that didn't bear thinking about because then they would be back to square one and all of Poe's efforts to find the map would have gone to waste.

All the key members of the Resistance were around the table, but Rosella had taken her stand behind Poe. She had dropped his hand, the motion enough to make Poe turn to look at her questioningly before she moved a hand down his arm and offered him a small smile. She didn't know when they had grown so comfortable offering displays of affection in public.

They never used to do it, but now it didn't bother her who saw them holding hands. Poe didn't seem to care either, even when he was in the presence of his superiors. Then again, Poe was cocky enough to think that he could get away with whatever he wanted. In a way, he could, but Rosella didn't like to push the boundaries.

"She's there," Leia said. "The question is whether she has found Luke or not?"

"And if she hasn't?" Poe asked of Leia and the General looked to her favoured pilot, her gaze meeting his as they both looked concerned over what she was going to answer about that.

"Then we start again."

There was a round of complaints as people threw their hands in the air; unable to believe that could be an option. There were some who mumbled under their breath while Rosella looked around at all of them, knowing full well that they had a right to complain. They had fought hard to get to the position they were in now and then they were hearing that it could all be for naught.

"We start again," Leia clarified. "But until we hear word from Rey, we keep the faith. My brother can help us defeat the First Order once and for all."

"We destroyed their biggest weapon," someone spoke up and Rosella almost felt the need to roll her eyes. "They will be easy to finish off if we can find them."

"No," Leia said with a shake of her head. "They are more powerful than you give them credit. They are not foolish, nor are they weak. I have no doubt that…Snoke…he has a backup plan."

"But we should attack them while they're weak."

"We don't know where they are," Poe spoke up. "We have no idea where they could be. We need to regroup too. We lost some good men in that fight, plus we need more ships."

There was silence then before a murmur of agreements rose up and Poe looked around the table, nodding to Leia, showing that he was with her on this. She dismissed them all after a few minutes, saying that she would wait until she heard anything from Rey. Poe moved and Rosella turned, leading the way from the control room.

"She'll find him," Rosella said and Poe shrugged.

"I hope so," he said. "If she doesn't then I don't know what will happen, Rosella. I don't know how we would find a way out of this. If the First Order wanted the map then it has to be pretty reliable."

"I hope so," Rosella mumbled. "Because they will be back and you know that they will be even stronger, Poe. They won't come back weak."

Poe gulped and took her hand. "That's the part that scares me."

…

A/N: Do let me know if you are reading, it would mean a lot to know people are still with me! Thanks for reading!


	23. Chapter 23

Rosella had been to visit Finn every day in the medical bay, sitting by his pod and telling him things he could not hear, but she wanted to speak to him. She would often tell him of her day and what she had taught the children. There had been a time when she had informed him that Rey had reached Luke safely. She hoped that he could hear that. She would then ask the nurse how he was getting on, but all she was told was that he was stable.

"It has been a week," Rosella complained to Poe as the pair of them sat in the mess hall, chewing on whatever food had been served up. They weren't exactly sure, but it didn't taste too horrific. "Surely he should be woken up soon?"

"No idea," Poe shrugged his shoulders at her, chewing down on some bread. "I mean, the wounds were quite deep, Rose. No doubt he needs time heal fully before they wake him up. I know you're eager to see him, but he just needs to get better."

Sighing, Rosella raked a hand through her hair, noticing how much it had grown in the past few months. She pushed it over her shoulder before shrugging over to Poe, twirling her fork in her fingertips as she looked down to the food.

"I know," she admitted to him. "I just still feel guilty."

"You have no need to," Poe said with a shake of his head, his gaze finding hers as he dared to move a hand over the table to take hers, his fingers wrapping over hers tightly as he offered her one of those Poe Dameron smirks. "Besides, you have me to take your mind off of that."

Rosella scoffed, squeezing Poe's hand before releasing it and going back to her food, grabbing hold of her knife and cutting into some kind of meat as she let her lips curl upwards.

"And what does the great Poe Dameron have planned for me tonight?" she asked of him and he shrugged at her, chewing down on the bread as he spoke, his hands breaking more from the lump.

"Don't know," Poe told her. "I was thinking we could go the hanger and wash my ship."

"Romantic," Rosella said, sarcasm laced in her voice. "Besides, don't you have people who do that for you?"

"Do you think I let anyone near my ship?" he wondered, eyes wide as he spoke and Rosella let herself laugh before shaking her head back and forth.

"I know you don't," she said, "but if that is the only offer then I think I might just have an early night."

"Spoil sport," Poe complained to her, winking once as he saw her cheeks tint red and a part of him was glad that he still had this kind of effect on her. He enjoyed seeing her blush under his gaze. He enjoyed seeing how he could her to react to his charm. "In that case I might just have to think of something more exciting for you."

"If you can," Rosella said. "Preferably you could find something that involves some better food than this."

She let a chunk of meat fall from her fork as Poe arched a brow. "Do you think I can find some luxury dining on this base?" Poe wondered. "Rosella, you ask the impossible from me. We did well to have something edible tonight. Apparently while we were gone they did some kind of broth and Jess found something moving inside of it."

Rosella rolled her eyes at hearing him. "That did not happen," she said and Poe held his hands up in defence.

"Swear on Pava's life it did," he told her and she continued to look at him in a disbelieving manner. "Well, that's what she told me. No idea if she was telling me the truth, but she looked traumatised."

"In that case," Rosella mumbled, dropping her cutlery onto her plate. "I'd rather be safe than sorry."

"Then let's get out of here," Poe said with a shrug. "Come on, we could fly somewhere for a couple of days. I doubt the First Order are going to try anything right now. Besides-"

"-Rosella!"

Poe didn't have a chance to finish his proposition and Rosella groaned at that. Leaving with Poe for a couple of days seemed like a genuinely nice prospect for some time. She looked over to where the sound of her name had come from as everyone went silent, looking to the doorway where a small woman stood, her cheeks tinged red and her lips taking a chewing to.

Rosella stood up and Poe followed her towards the doorway as people watched them go.

"Is something wrong?" she wondered.

"We have a message," the woman said. "The General wants to see you in the control room."

Rosella said nothing as she felt Poe move his hand to her back and she looked up to him, shrugging as her face scrunched up in confusion. Poe offered her some form of smile as she watched him. Once she had turned away his lips dropped as they began to wander through the corridors and towards the control room. The General was stood in the middle by the table, her hands holding onto the sides of it.

Freezing on the spot, Rosella saw who she was speaking to and she felt her heart pound against her chest. Poe's hand fell from her back and he clenched his fingers into fists by his side, his teeth grinding together as he watched the man on the hologram. Saying nothing, Rosella wandered forwards as Leia ceased her conversation and Rosella nodded.

Moving to stand beneath the camera, Rosella looked him in the eye as she finally entered his vision. He seemed to sneer at the sight of her, his lip curling upwards as he kept his hands behind his back, his black cap covering most of his red hair. Saying nothing, Rosella watched him as he seemed to observe her, taking in everything about her.

"I am here to give you one last chance," he said, voice terse and any sense of forgiveness gone from it. "Come to me or I will have no option but to destroy you should you get in my way."

"Where are you, Armitage?" Rosella enquired from her husband as he chuckled, the sound dark as he arched a brow, his pale face looking slightly amused as she spoke.

"Why do you think I will tell you that?" Armitage wondered. "All you need to know is that there will be no escaping. The Supreme Leader has told me that there is only one chance left for you considering your defiance."

"So you still answer to him?" Rosella asked, arms folding over her chest as she remained intrigued at what she was hearing from him.

"He is the Supreme Leader," Armitage responded as if the answer were obvious. "I am telling you now, Rosella, come home and we can try to make things work. We can be amicable towards each other."

"And how can I come home if I do not know where home is?" Rosella wondered.

"I would meet you at a mutual location and take you there," Armitage responded and Rosella shook her head as Poe continued to watch Armitage from the corner of the room. He had one arm bent over his stomach while the other rested by his chin, his fingers tapping against it as he considered what the man was saying to Rosella.

"I can't," Rosella said to him. "I faked my death to escape you and the First Order. Why would I come back willingly?"

"Because I am your husband," Armitage said as if it were simple.

Shrugging, Rosella looked down before daring to look him in the eye once more. He hadn't softened, but there did seem to be some look in his eye she had not seen before. It was almost as if he were hoping she would come back to him. But she couldn't. That was not an option for her.

"You are," Rosella agreed, "but it is too late for us, Armitage, and I am sorry about that. So if you send your troopers…or whatever comes…then I will accept that fate. You can tell your Supreme Leader that."

"You are a fool," Armitage told her. "Such a fool, Rosella."

"Perhaps," she nodded, "but I'd rather be a fool than go back to the First Order."

And with that she stopped the transmission, hitting the button on the table as Leia told people to go and mind their own business in the control room. Poe moved over to Rosella, taking hold of her by the hand as she managed a smile up to him, head nodding in his direction.

"What you were saying earlier; about going away for a while?" she said and Poe nodded, bending down to kiss her on the forehead.

"Consider it done."

 _Six Years Ago_

 _He stood in the distance, looking on as his wife sat on the ground, the grass swaying around her. She had her nose buried in one of the books that he had bought her for a birthday present. He looked at her from the window of their quarters, the glass door open and letting the breeze in. They lived on a barren planet and Rosella would often find solace from sitting outside, the sun on her face as she read._

 _He had seen her do it often, the bookcase in their bedroom filled to the brim with books. She read anything and everything. She was a lover of stories, but she also enjoyed learning about the planets and studying other languages. He could see her peering down at the back in her lap, her hands pushing her hair behind her ears as she mouthed something. Clearly she was trying to speak another tongue._

 _His hands went behind his back as he remembered what his father had said to him earlier._

" _You are weak for the girl."_

 _Armitage had wanted to leave his father's quarters then and there. The man could not handle the fact that he had been passed over for as General. His son had taken the title and he was now the man in charge of building the First Order._

" _I am not," Armitage responded, voice tight. "Regardless, I am trying to have a different relationship than you had with my mother."_

" _Your mother was a worthless whore," Brendol hissed._

" _And Rosella is not," Armitage snapped. "I do not want to be like you. I never want to be anything like you…washed up…scathing…"_

" _How dare you," Brendol hissed once more._

" _I dare because it is true," Armitage said. "Now, my marriage is none of your concern."_

" _The girl will ruin you," Brendol said as Armitage walked towards the door, refusing to listen to anymore from him. "She is an idealist. You know that. She will either be the downfall of your power or you will hurt her. You will never be happy."_

 _Armitage did not respond, instead he went back to his quarters and stood by the large window, watching his wife. He took a deep breath before stepping outside, his footsteps quiet as he approached her. She wore a short black dress, her legs bent underneath her body and the sleeves rolled up to her elbow. Her hair was still behind her ears as Armitage stood over her._

" _What are you reading?" he asked and she startled, her hand going to her chest as she offered him a small smile._

 _He bent down onto the floor, sitting down next to her as he looked to her and the book that she was reading. She closed it, folding the page before handing it over to Armitage who raised an amused eyebrow on his forehead._

" _Ithorese," he said._

" _Yes," Rosella nodded, "but some of the pronunciation is proving to be quite difficult…and harsh sounding."_

" _How so?" he wondered from her, flicking through the book._

" _Hard vowels," Rosella answered him. "I am hoping to have mastered it by tomorrow, if possible."_

" _No doubt you will," Armitage responded, handing her the book back, his pale fingers a stark contrast to its black binding as he looked to his wife and she cradled the book against her stomach. "I have yet to meet someone as studious as you."_

 _She looked down for a second. "Father did tell me that a girl should be well read," she informed Armitage, "but he told me that men do not like women who go too far."_

" _And why is that?" Armitage enquired, the wind ruffling his hair as he moved his legs in front of him, his hands going behind himself to hold his weight as his wife sat to his side._

" _Apparently it makes them feel threatened," she said and he chuckled, closing his eyes and letting the sun wash over him for a few moments._

" _Men who feel threatened are nothing but insecure," Armitage informed her. "Believe me, Rosella, I have nothing against someone who wishes to learn and further their knowledge. In fact, it is quite an endearing trait."_

" _I know," Rosella said and he looked to her from the side of his eyes as she watched him for a moment. "You never seem to say anything when I find another book."_

" _If it occupies your time and you enjoy it then I have no issue," Armitage informed her. "Besides, there might come a time when you need to put that knowledge into practice. No doubt there will be a place in the First Order for you once we have rose to prominence."_

" _Yes," Rosella merely managed to whisper, not telling him how the feeling made her feel quite queasy. "Perhaps we should go in? Is your father not dining with us tonight?"_

 _He scoffed. "I doubt it after the argument we just had," he told her._

" _Oh," Rosella said, knowing not to get into the details. Armitage hated discussing his father with her. He hated anything to do with the man. Not that she could blame him. Brendol Hux was a cantankerous old man._

" _It matters not," Armitage told her. "Besides, I am quite enjoying the sun."_

 _Rosella did laugh then, the noise light as Armitage looked over to her, his brow arched as he wondered what was so funny. She said nothing for a second before daring to speak, her voice light as the smile remained on her face._

" _You never see the sun," she told him. "I often wonder if you would burn after a moment in it."_

 _He seemed to smile at her jest, his eyes closing once more before he turned to look up the orb in the sky, his eyes closing once more as he felt his wife move closer to him, her hand daring to wrap on top of his. He opened his eyes at the contact, but she was too busy staring into the distance. He followed her gaze, letting his hand move to wrap into hers. He could get used to this._

….

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	24. Chapter 24

_Six Years Ago_

 _Sitting down at the dinner table, Rosella waited with patience for her husband to return from work. It was his birthday and, even though he had said that he didn't want any fuss, she had ignored him. She hadn't gone out of her way to humiliate him for his birthday with a party, but she had cooked a dinner and bought him a present she only hoped he might like. The problem with Armitage was that he was a man who had everything he ever wanted. Well, that was what he said. Rosella didn't know if it was necessarily true, but she suspected it wasn't far from it._

 _She had worked in the small kitchen all day, cleaning as she went. She hadn't gone to too much trouble. She had made some chicken and vegetables in a tomato sauce before working on chocolate pudding. Sticking candles into the pudding, she wondered if that had been a step too far. Biting down on her lip, she shrugged and stood up._

 _Pulling the pudding from the fridge, she had left it in the middle of the table, searching for matchsticks before she heard the door open. The room was dark, mainly for added effect when she heard his voice enter the room._

" _Rosella?" he called into the darkness. "What in the name of the Force are you-"_

" _-Close your eyes," Rosella interrupted him with haste as she finally found the matchsticks in the dark._

" _Rosella, what is going on?" Armitage continued. "And why is it so dark in here?"_

" _Leave the lights," she demanded, but it was too late._

 _He had turned the lights back on in the room just as she had lit the candles. Sighing softly, she dropped her hands to her hips as Armitage peered into the room, wondering exactly what was going on as he saw the food at the table. She watched his face remain stoic and she wondered if she had gone too far. He didn't move. He just stood where he was, dressed in his black jumper and trousers, his hair a mess on top of his head as his eyes remained on the table in front of him._

" _Surprise," Rosella offered him meekly and he let his eyebrows knit together in concentration as he looked at her with intrigue._

 _She remained stood where she was, her heart pounding against her chest as she heard her blood pump to her ears. She should have known she had gone too far. It was his first birthday they had celebrated together. She should have known not to make a fuss._

 _The flame on the candle died out without him going near it and she let out a small breath as she looked down to it and then over to the food. Armitage, for her sake more than his, moved closer to the table, standing on the opposite side of it to her as he looked down to the food._

" _You did all of this?" he asked of her and she nodded._

" _Yes," she said, too nervous to ask if he liked it._

 _He nodded his head once, coughing and placing a hand over his mouth. He kept his gaze set on the food as Rosella let out a shaky breath and shrugged her shoulders, trying to act nonchalant but failing miserably as she moved to pick up the pudding, holding the plate that it sat on._

" _I'm so sorry," she began. "I just thought that maybe it would be nice to have dinner, but I know you said that you didn't want a fuss."_

 _As his wife sprung into action, Armitage shook his head at her, moving with haste until he was by her side in the kitchen. She placed the pudding down on the worktop before she felt his cold hands on her bare arms. He never tired of feeling how warm she was compared to him. He thrived on the feeling. Moving her to face him, he kept his hands tightly coiled around her forearms, forcing her to look him in the eye._

" _I am not mad," he declared. "I am anything but mad, Rosella."_

" _But…but you never said anything."_

" _I was shocked," was all that Armitage could do to explain to her. "Father never permitted me to celebrate my birthday. He…this…this is all very new to me."_

" _Me too," Rosella whispered to him, "but I just thought that it might be…nice?"_

 _Armitage felt his lips quirk at hearing her speak and he nodded his head, agreeing with her. "And I appreciate the effort you went to," he informed her, his tone stiff and formal like usual as Rosella managed a small smile and he felt his spirits lift at the sight of it on her face. "You had no need to do this for me."_

" _I know," she answered, "but I wanted to."_

 _Moving away from his grip, she took his hand and led him towards the table, showing him to his seat as she sat next to him. She placed her napkin onto her lap before picking up her knife and fork. But she didn't eat. Instead she watched him dig into the food first, her gaze set on him. Raising an amused brow, he reached for his wine after a mouthful._

" _Something wrong?" he asked of her._

" _Does it taste alright?" Rosella wondered and Armitage nodded, not wanting to offend her feelings in the slightest._

" _Very nice," he promised her. "Come on, you should eat up before it goes cold."_

 _Doing as he had said, Rosella chomped down on the food delicately. The two of them ate in silence before she cleared the plates away and wandered into their bedroom behind a doorway. Grabbing hold of the wrapped present, she held it tightly to her chest, wondering if he would appreciate it before she walked back to the table._

 _He seemed relaxed, his hand holding onto his cup of wine while he looked outside of the window onto the field behind their room. Slinking back into her chair, Rosella placed the present on the table, sliding it over to Armitage who looked to it._

" _You bought me a present?" he asked from her._

" _I…well…I remembered what you said that evening we sat outside and I thought…never mind…"_

 _She was about to take the present back, but Armitage snatched it away. Moving to unwrap it from the brown paper, he looked to it with intrigue before Rosella felt the need to explain herself to him. She moved quickly, standing up besides him as she spoke._

" _You remember the other night we were outside and you said how you saw all of the planets, but never learnt their names…well…I mean…I thought that if I bought you a book of them then we could…maybe…if you want to…look at them together."_

 _She finished speaking as he looked down to the book in his fingertips and Rosella felt her cheek tint red as she shook her head with haste. Moving to grab the book, she picked it up as she began to walk away._

" _I knew I shouldn't have done it," she said to herself more than to him as she wandered through the living room. "You're too busy to bother with such-"_

 _Before she could finish, Armitage was behind her, his hand moving to grip her forearm as he pulled her back to him, his other arm going to hold her waist tightly as he watched her close her eyes once his lips were pressing against hers. Dropping the book out of shock, Rosella felt Armitage move one hand up her back until his fingers were holding the back of her head. His other hand went to hold onto her cheek as he felt her hands tentatively move to wrap around his forearms._

 _Pulling back for a moment, Armitage closed his eyes, forehead pressed against hers. It took another moment before he let out a shaky breath. Saying nothing, Rosella kept her eyes shut, knowing that he was watching her._

" _Thank you," Armitage said to her, his breath warm against her cheek._

" _You're welcome," Rosella responded, shocked by his sudden outburst. Armitage never did anything like that. Most of the times he touched her were planned and calculated. He was never spontaneous._

" _And you made cake," he whispered and she felt her lips quirk._

" _I did," she said, placing a hand to his chest as she uncurled herself from his grip and bent down, handing him his book back before she went to pick up the cake from the worktop._

 _Grabbing a fork, she didn't know if she was being too forwards when she left the quarters out of the sliding glass door. Walking to the field, she plopped herself down, placing the cake next to her legs as she folded them underneath herself. It only took a few moments before Armitage made his appearance known, settling down on the ground next to her before picking up a fork._

" _You didn't have to go to this much trouble, Rosella," he declared, cutting off a bit of cake._

" _I know," she said back. "I just thought…well…no one does anything for you, Armitage…and…we are married. We should at least try to do things like this for each other."_

 _Nodding his head, he ate a slice of cake before putting the fork back down. "Perhaps we should," he agreed with her, forgetting everything his father had told him about her. Rosella was good for him. He knew that. She had to be._

Now

Sitting in their chamber, Rosella poured over maps while Poe brushed his teeth in the small bathroom, looking in the mirror while Rosella tried to think of somewhere where they could go and just be them for a little while. Everywhere she had suggested had seemed to scare Poe or make him complain.

"Takonda?" she asked.

"The First Order were there," he responded, swilling his mouth out.

"Were," Rosella took that word. "Poe, everywhere else has either been struck off your list or places you won't consider. Takonda is full of green trees, hills and lakes. We could just go and be happy camping for a couple of days. We don't need anything."

Arching a brow, Poe held a towel in his fingers, wiping his face from where he had washed it as he moved back to the bedroom. He looked over to her, the sight of her sat there in one of his shirts enough to make his head feel fuzzy for a moment. He doubted he would ever tire of that sight.

"You mean you want to camp?" Poe asked from her.

"I mean," she drawled back to him, "I want to get away from here and just have peace and quiet for a couple of days. Sleeping in a tent…bed…whatever. Please, just say we can go to Takonda."

Taking a deep breath, Poe shrugged his shoulders as he saw her jump up and down on the bed, pulling his shirt back to her knees after she had made the motion. She closed her eyes for a second before folding the map away and Poe went to the bed, flopping down on it, tossing the towel on the floor as his legs dangled over the side of the bed.

"But if we go to Takonda then we stay away from the cantina," he informed her.

"With pleasure," Rosella responded to him with a nod, moving to kneel by his side as she moved a hand up his chest before he grabbed holder of her fingers, kissing her on the back of her hand.

"Do you know what?" Poe asked from her, "I feel pretty good right now."

"Do you?" Rosella wondered, moving to lay by his side, her head burrowing against his neck. "I do too."

"And what he said?" Poe asked, knowing he shouldn't be nervous to broach the subject, but he did so anyway. She had told him that she didn't want any secrets kept between the pair of them and that was the way he intended to keep it up.

"Means nothing," Rosella promised in a small voice. "Armitage has decided his path and I have chosen mine."

"I know," Poe responded, "but our path could end up getting us killed, Rose. We both know that when the First Order return then they will probably be bigger and stronger. We need to try and destroy them before they come back."

"I know," Rosella said. "I know that this war is far from over, but can we not talk about it for two days? Please?"

Turning his head to the side to look to her, Poe nodded his head. "For you? Anything."


	25. Chapter 25

Looking around, Rosella felt contentment. She didn't know if she had felt like this in a long time. She had found herself sitting down on the ground by the lake, a soft breeze blowing her hair behind her back and cooling down her cheeks. She had her eyes closed as she heard Poe sit down next to her. She didn't bother to open her eyes. Instead she let Poe drape his arm over her shoulders, holding her closer to him as she let her head drop to his shoulder.

"Is this everything you wanted?" Poe asked from her and she laughed softly.

"For now," she said. "It is so peaceful, Poe. I don't think it has been this peaceful in a long time."

"You would be correct," Poe agreed with her. "We should be far enough away from the cantina not to be noticed. They're rebuilding it after the battle."

"How bad was the damage?" Rosella wondered and Poe let out a low whistle as he moved his hand up and down her upper arm, keeping her warm as she wore a pantsuit with no sleeves.

"Pretty bad," Poe told her. "We got here after the First Order which wasn't ideal. I think we managed to save those who we could."

"I do not doubt it," Rosella assured Poe in a small voice before she moved to sit in front of him, her hands resting on her thighs as she let her eyes settle on Poe. It took her another second before she spoke. "I have been thinking."

Poe chuckled. "Really?" Poe enquired from her. "And what is it you have been thinking of?"

"What we should do after all of this?" Rosella said. "I know you, Poe. I know that you like adventure. You like to help people. You…even if we defeat the First Order and eliminate every single threat in the galaxy, you will still want to do something adventurous."

Poe arched a brow. "Do you think so?" he wondered. "Because I am not too sure about that anymore, Rosella. I…I do what I do because it is the right thing, but the thought of it ending and living a quiet life seems quite appealing to me right now."

Nodding at him, Rosella agreed. "You think that now," Rosella said. "But I just…I want that life and I want the life with you. I love you, Poe. I love you more than you know and I want us to be together."

"I want that too," Poe promised her. "You don't need to worry, Rosella. I do want that."

"I…I don't doubt you, Poe," Rosella whispered. "It's just that the last man I told that to said that…he…he said that being with me wouldn't be enough. I know you, Poe. You would never hurt me like he did, but…I still get scared."

Poe knelt before her then, his hands going to cup her cheeks as he took hold of them in his fingertips, his thumbs roaming over her cheekbones as she watched him with intrigue. It took another second before he bent forwards, daring to press his lips against hers. The movement took her off guard as she closed her eyes at the feeling of his lips pressing against hers, the motion tender and soft.

She closed her eyes as Poe remained tender with her, understanding exactly what she had said to him. He knew that she didn't think he was anything like Armitage. He knew that. But he also knew that she feared she would not be enough. Armitage had been a fool. If he had been in love with Rosella then he would have left the First Order and kept her. But he couldn't have loved her.

Poe pulled back after a moment, his hands still holding Rosella's cheeks. "You are more than enough for anyone," Poe promised her. "Never ever think that you are not good enough. I am the one who is lucky to have you, Rosella. Do you not see?"

Rosella scoffed and looked at Poe with an arched brow before pulling a hand through her hair and shaking her head at hearing him. "Don't be ridiculous," she said to him. "I know what I am, Poe. I'm damaged and you're the Resistance's best pilot."

"True," Poe said, eliciting a laugh from her as she hit him on the chest and he let out a laugh before shaking his head at her. "But that is not the point, Rosella. The point is that, yes, you might be damaged, but that does not make you weak or pathetic. You are pulling yourself back together. You are braver than you think and I need you to know that."

She said nothing back to him, instead she kept silent. She nodded her head, not wanting to discuss it anymore.

"I'm trying," she promised him and moved to stand on her feet, holding a hand down to him, "but maybe we could go for a walk and just…just forget about all of this for a little?"

Poe took her hand but hauled himself up, moving to keep her hand inside of his as he went to drape his arm over her shoulders. They said nothing further, instead they were quite content to wander by each other's side along the lake.

…

"Poe, that is cheating," Rosella complained to him as she let out a laugh.

She had seen him pull out two prepared meals as she sat by the lake that evening, the sun slowly setting and glimmering over it, reflecting with intensity. She took hold of the plate that Poe had handed to her and picked at the cakes and bread. She watched on the lake as Poe sat next to her once more.

"Not really," Poe said. "You didn't think we were going to hunt for fish or forage in the woods, did you?"

She laughed at hearing him, shrugging her shoulders. "I did think that we were going to have a unique experience," she responded to him. "But I suppose we don't exactly know how to catch fish."

"Hey, you underestimate me," Poe said through a mouthful of bread as she looked to him with an arched brow and a condescending stare. "What?" he asked from her. "I can catch fish. You're forgetting, I am the best pilot in the Resistance."

Rosella laughed lowly at hearing him, shaking her head back and forth. "I wish that I could forget, but you never let me. You never let anyone forget. Anyway, just because you can fly a plane that does not mean you can catch fish."

Poe shook his head, moving to his feet. "Do you want a bet?" he asked, wiping his hands on his trousers.

"Excuse me?" Rosella asked, unsure if she was hearing Poe correctly, but he was already back away towards the lake, looking at her with a gleam in his eye. "Poe, what are you doing?"

"Proving you wrong," Poe said and before Rosella could say anything more, Poe was already moving into the lake. She laughed loudly at the sight of him wading into the water, fully clothed. She moved her plate to sit next to Poe's before standing up and moving to the water's edge. She continued to laugh as she stood by the edge of the lake.

"Poe, what are you doing?" Rosella called to him. "You cannot catch fish with your bare hands."

"Sure you can," Poe called back, looking into the clear water. "I've seen people do it before."

"No, you cannot," Rosella responded, folding her arms and crumpling the material of her pantsuit as she made the movement. "Poe, be serious."

"I am," Poe told her.

"No, you're not," Rosella retorted as Poe seemed to lose his footing all of a sudden and he collapsed underneath the water, arms flailing around. She laughed loudly at seeing him before he came up, coughing and spluttering for breath.

She continued to laugh, unable to control herself as she doubled over and Poe placed his hands to his hips. He was sodden, his clothes drenched and his hair floppy on top of his head. He looked a mess.

"Think that's funny?"

"How can you not?" Rosella responded and Poe moved then, rushing towards the water's edge and reaching for Rosella. But she was quick, shaking her head and moving back from him.

"No," she warned him in a low voice, holding a hand in front of her, but Poe ignored her and launched into a jog.

Rosella ran then, still howling with laughter as Poe rushed after her, his arms in front of him as he finally caught up with her, arms going around her waist to hold onto her. She fought him, but she failed as Poe kept his arms around her and he dragged her towards the water.

"Stop it," Rosella demanded from him. "Poe, put me down!"

"No can do, Rose," Poe declared, rushing towards the water until he had dragged her into it. She shrieked loudly as she felt Poe drop her and she collapsed into the water, her body acclimatising to the cold. She stood up after a moment, arms stretched by her sides as water dripped down her and she moved her hands to push her hair from her face.

"You still look stunning," Poe tried to woo her, but she shook her head, her face contorted with anger but her lips quirking with amusement.

"Do not try to flatter me, Dameron," she warned him.

"What you going to do?" Poe teased her. "Get me wet? I'm pretty drenched already, Rose."

"I know," Rosella replied.

But she moved to splash Poe, letting the water rise into the air and fall onto him, wetting his face once more. Moving his hands to wipe the droplets from his eyes, Poe then let his lips continue to rise upwards before he splashed her back. The two of them continued for a while before they grew tired, collapsing against each other and laughing loudly as they made it to the sand. Falling onto the floor, Poe felt Rosella fall next to him, her hand going to his chest as she propped herself up and onto her elbow.

"You're crazy," Rosella whispered to him and Poe nodded, a hand going to her cheek as he ran a hand down her face.

"I know," Poe told her. "Maybe it is all of this fresh air."

"Maybe so," Rosella said and moved to kiss Poe on the cheek once more. "Maybe so."

…

Sitting down on the chair in his quarters, Armitage Hux let out a shaky breath, his eyes closing as he thought about the conversation he had the other day with his wife. She was determined not to come back to him. She was determined not to come home. Armitage could not blame her, however. He knew exactly what she was thinking and going through. He had been the one who put her through it.

She had been his wife and she had been the only woman he had dared to care for. But if he cared for her, would he have done all of those things to her? Would he have hurt her? Would he have scared her the way he did? He didn't know. All he knew was that he felt something stir inside of him at the thought of not seeing her again.

Perhaps things might have been different. Perhaps she might still love him the way she had done all those years ago. Perhaps power wasn't all he thought it was if there was no one there by your side.


	26. Chapter 26

_Five Years Ago_

 _Rosella watched on as Armitage told her the news. She had taken a deep breath before listening to him over dinner. The past year had been intriguing between the pair of them. They had settled into married life and Rosella thought that she was doing everything in her way to be doting wife. She acted the part of loving companion whenever they were in public and Armitage was doing everything in his way to get powerful people to join the First Order._

 _But then Armitage had dropped the bombshell on Rosella. He told her what was required from her and she didn't know if she could do it. She didn't know if she could do what Armitage wanted and that scared her. It scared her because she knew how volatile her husband could be when people went against him. She hated that about him._

" _I don't know if I can, Armitage," Rosella said in a whisper to him and he moved to stand up, not finishing his dinner._

 _His hands went behind his back, his pale spindly fingers lacing together as he let out a shallow breath and spoke. "Rosella, you are the wife of the General of the First Order. There are certain expectations that come with being in such a position."_

 _Rosella gulped, the noise harsh. "I understand, Armitage," she assured him, "but I do not think that I can do that…they are children…young and innocent…they deserve better. They deserve to be children."_

" _They cannot stay children forever," Armitage reminded her. "They need to grow up and join our army. They need to do that."_

" _But they are so young," Rosella protested against him. "I do not think that they need to know about such death and destruction at a young age. Armitage, I cannot do it…teach them…"_

" _I do not think that you entirely understand what I am saying to you, Rosella," Armitage said and she felt him come to stand behind her chair, his hands gripping the back of it. She closed her eyes for a moment as his hand went to her shoulder. "I am telling you that you are going to teach them. This is not up for negotiation."_

" _Armitage-"_

" _-No," Armitage interrupted her, his fingers squeezing on her shoulder and crumpling the black dress she wore as his other hand went to her cheek, his knuckles resting just beneath her cheekbone. "As I have just said, Rosella, this is not up for discussion."_

" _Please," Rosella whispered. "Please don't treat me like them."_

 _Armitage arched a brow. "Like who?"_

" _Like everyone," Rosella said. "I am your wife, Armitage. Do I not deserve for you to speak to me with something other than contempt? Do I not deserve that? I am your wife…please…treat me like I am."_

 _Armitage ground his teeth together and released Rosella. He pulled at the black shirt he wore, tucking it firmly into his trousers before stomping through their quarters. Rosella watched him go before she saw him turn back to look to her, his cheeks tinged red and his finger pointing in her direction._

" _How dare you speak to me like that," he seethed. "Do you not see what I do for you, Rosella? Have you not noticed how I have kept you shielded from everything? I have never mistreated nor have I ever hurt you. The Supreme Leader demands for this to happen. You are my wife. You are important and you should pull your weight. I have found you the easiest job and this is how you respond? You act ungrateful."_

 _Rosella moved to her feet then, steadying herself in her heels as she moved forwards, hands on her hips. She kept her distance from him while he watched her and she let her thoughts get the better of her._

" _I act anything but ungrateful," she retorted. "Armitage, I do everything you ask from me. I am loyal and I never step a foot out of line. I care for you. I care about you, but this?" she asked, motioning around the room. "Being here and living under the thumb of your father and this Supreme Leader…I don't want this. I want you. I want to be with you."_

 _Armitage was taken back by what she was saying. Moving towards him, Rosella reached out and took hold of him by the hands, grabbing hold onto them tightly. He looked down to the motion as Rosella kept watching his pale features._

" _Armitage, please," she whispered to him. "Please understand. This is not you. This is what your father has done. He brought you up like this…thinking that you were weak and unworthy, but he was so wrong. You do not need to do this to prove him wrong. You are ten times the man he is."_

" _That is not what this is about," Armitage said._

" _No?" she wondered from him. "So this is what you want? You want to watch children suffer? You want to take over those who do not want to be ruled? Kill innocent people?"_

" _Not if they submit to the will of the First Order," Armitage declared and Rosella shook her head. "There will be no harm to anyone if they submit."_

 _Rosella gulped. "No," she said with a whisper. "This is not you, Armitage. I know you. You can be kind…tender…a man who is better than this."_

 _Armitage pushed his hands from hers and shook his head. "I am your husband," he said, "and you shall do exactly as I ask."_

" _And if I do not?" Rosella wondered. "What are you going to do to me?"_

" _Nothing," Armitage said, "because you will do this. I have decided. Now, stay here and think. You need time. I can see that you are overwhelmed."_

 _She had no chance to say anything further. She watched as Armitage left their quarters and she sunk down into the seat, her eyes closing as she shook her head, wondering exactly how she could bring Armitage back from the brink of the edge he was on._

Now

"I don't want to go back," Rosella said as she let her head rest on Poe's shoulder. He had his arm draped around her, holding her close by his side as they looked out onto the lake they were staying by.

"Hmm," Poe drawled lowly, his cheek resting on the top of her head. She watched as night slowly fell over Takonda. "I'd rather not go back, but I know that we have to. We have a duty to help…whatever the First Order are planning isn't going to be pleasant."

"Never is," Rosella said with a shrug of her shoulders. "So should we go back tonight or in the morning?"

"We can go in the morning," Poe told her. "For tonight I'd quite like to spend the night just being us for a while. I know that once we go back then we won't have this peace and quiet."

"We never do," Rosella said. "I just hate not knowing what is going to happen, Poe. I hate the idea of him being somewhere…being somewhere and wanting to rebuild the First Order. I…I'm just scared, Poe. After what he said, he-"

"-He's never going to get to you again," Poe interrupted her, knowing full well how her mind could wander whenever she was nervous about something.

He moved down to peck her on the cheek as she moved to her feet and Poe did the same. He took hold of her by the hand, wandering along the sand besides her and further away from the ship that they had taken. Poe looked to her and knew full well that her mind was going back to Armitage. She tended to do that quite often.

"I love you," Poe finally said to Rosella, snapping her from her daze. "I love you more than you know and I want you to understand that whatever might be coming will not affect you because I won't let it."

Rosella stood before Poe and he moved a hand to her cheek, letting his fingers roam over her cheekbone and push her hair behind her ear. She shuddered at the motion before moving her own hand to his shoulder.

"I love you too," she promised him in a whisper. "Poe, I do love you. I want you to know that. I just…I'm just scared of him. I'm scare of what he could do. I know what he has done and I know that he wasn't always like this. He wasn't always this kind of man."

"You don't need to try to defend him," Poe promised her.

"I'm not," Rosella said, "because he made his choice and I couldn't stop him. But now I've made mine. I've made my decision and I want you, Poe."

Poe smirked gently and bent down to kiss her sweetly. Moving his hand through her hair, Poe continued to kiss her tenderly as Rosella closed her eyes, enjoying this fleeting moment between them. But they soon jumped apart as the ground shook beneath their feet. Poe grabbed hold of Rosella by the lower arms, steadying her as they both panted for breath.

Looking around, Rosella wondered what was happening as she saw a red light in the sky above. Gulping, the light seemed to grow in intensity as Poe shook his head with haste.

"That cannot be good," he said. "Come on, we need to get out of here."

…


	27. Chapter 27

Sitting on board the small spacecraft, Rosella leaned forwards and flicked a switch, attempting to make contact with the Resistance base. Failing miserably, all she received was silence. Poe flew the ship, his entire attention focused on finding out what the light in the sky had been. Rosella kept her eyes on the red beam, knowing full well where it had come from. There was only one man who was guilty in her eyes.

"I can't make contact with base," Rosella informed Poe. "There's no one on D'Qar."

"Because they blew it up," Poe said. "The First Order…we knew that they would come back stronger and this is it."

"They're going to try and quash the rebellion," Rosella responded, still trying to establish contact but failing miserably. "Armitage warned us that this would happen. He warned us that they would rise stronger than before and look at what we did…we did nothing…we should have evacuated."

"Hey," Poe said, his voice low and harsh as he turned to look to Rosella and she glanced over to him. "They will have gotten away, Rose. Leia would have done everything in her power to make sure of it."

"But will it ever be enough?" Rosella demanded, going back to the controls in front of her as she tried to make contact. "I know the First Order, Poe. They are more than Starkiller Base. They…they have arms dealers…they have ships that were being built when I was there. I should have-"

"-You should have done nothing," Poe interrupted her. "Rosella, you are not to blame. You could not have known what they were planning."

"Doesn't make it any easier," Rosella responded in a small whisper before she finally made a breakthrough. Taking a deep breath of relief, her hand went to press against her chest as she looked to the hologram of Leia appear before her eyes.

"Poe…Rosella…" Leia said in a soft voice at the sight of the two of them. "Thank the Force that you are both safe."

"Yeah, we're fine," Poe said with a quick nod. "What has been going on? We saw the blast. Was it the First Order?"

Leia's image flickered for a brief moment before nodding her head and Rosella looked off to the side. Her eyes closed as she thought about Armitage. Did he know that she was not on D'Qar? Or did he truly not care? She had made her choice and he had warned her. He had told her that he would not hesitate to destroy her along with the other rebel scum. She had told him that she had chosen Poe over him. She had chosen the Resistance over the First Order.

"They blew up our base on D'Qar," Leia said. "We managed to evacuate as many people as possible before they hit. I can have Letta patch through our location. I need you back here, Commander Dameron. I don't know how much longer we can outrun the First Order for."

"We'll be back as soon as possible," Poe said in a certain tone and Leia disappeared from sight.

"This is it," Rosella said in a soft voice. "It begins again."

…

Walking through the cruiser, Rosella did her best not to appear nervous as she went. She had been to see Finn while Poe went to discuss matters with Leia. Rosella had sat by Poe's side, looking at him as he remained in the glass tube, his vitals being monitored. She let out a shaky breath at the sight of him, wondering exactly how long it would be before he healed. She had patted his hand one final time before moving through the base, her arms folded over herself as she bit down on her lip and went.

She ignored the people who watched her, giving them no time of her day. She knew what they thought. She knew that she was regarded with contempt and no doubt the news had spread about what had happened the day that her husband had tried to make contact with her. People would still see her as a potential spy, despite everything she had done.

She had tried to help the Resistance. She had done everything in her power to help them, but it would never be enough. There would always be the doubters. But she didn't care. She did what she had to do. She did what she had to in order to keep Poe Dameron safe, and if that meant helping the Resistance then so be it.

Coming to the next corridor, Rosella looked down it, her brows knitting together at the sight in front of her. Sat on the floor underneath the window as a small girl with light brown hair that was plaited on top of her head. She wore a long grey dress, her knees curled up to her chin and her head buried into her kneecaps. Furrowing a brow, Rosella recognised her as she approached closer.

"Katrine?" she questioned and the little girl looked up, her eyes red rimmed. "Sweetheart, what is it?"

Rosella instantly fell to her knees before the girl, taking hold of her shoulders and running her hands along them. The girl sniffed and shook her head. She opened her mouth, about to speak, but then her sobs took over. Rosella moved closer to her, taking hold of her by the cheek and wiping her tears away.

"My…my parents…" Katrine said, sniffing loudly and wiping her nose with the back of her hand. "They…they…"

Nodding, Rosella didn't need her to say anything else. She knew exactly what she was trying to communicate with her. Rosella said nothing further, knowing that words would not comfort this small child in front of her. Katrine's parents were both medics, highly skilled and highly intelligent. But that had not saved them from the First Order. Nothing could save people from the First Order.

"Darling," Rosella whispered. "I am so sorry."

The girl began to cry loudly again as Rosella went to sit besides her, leaning back against the wall as she kept a hand on the girl's forearm. Katrine was only eleven. She was only a child. She had lost so much already. Then again, so had many others. The only issue was that Rosella saw no end in sight. When did it end? When did people feel safe again?

She wondered what had happened to the other children she had taught. Did they make it out? Had they survived? She needed to find out. She couldn't sit around and let herself stew.

"Katrine, sweetheart, come with me," Rosella said, moving to her feet and offering her hand to the little girl. "I'll find you somewhere to sleep, okay?"

Katrine was silent, but she took hold of Rosella's hand. Hauling her to her feet, Rosella wrapped her arm around the girl's shoulders, trying to urge her to stay strong. Walking down the corridors, no one paid them any attention, offering the little girl the privacy she so craved. She didn't need people looking at her and pitying her. She just wanted to be alone.

Entering the bridge, Rosella saw Poe stood with Leia by the large table which showed a hologram of the First Order ships that were tracking them in a cat and mouse game. Rosella caught the eye of Poe and the pilot looked over to her, noting the little girl she was guiding. She was a small girl and thin enough that the dress she wore was too big for her.

"General," Rosella said in a soft voice, gaining the attention of Leia. "I…I need to know…how many didn't make it?"

Leia looked down to the girl, but she was too lost in her own world, her tears rolling down her cheek. Leia felt her own chest begin to swell as she watched the girl. Gulping loudly, Leia looked Rosella in the eye and saw that the young woman's eyes were also wet.

"We lost sixty good men and women," Leia said. "The children…most of them are on the other cruiser. We are still trying to account for six."

Rosella nodded, gulping loudly. She couldn't cry. She couldn't shed any tears. She needed to be strong. Poe looked to her and moved with haste, his hand going to the small of her back as she turned to look up to him and he bent down, kissing her tenderly on the forehead. Leia watched the exchange before she crouched down slightly and looked to the little girl.

"What's your name?" she wondered from her.

The girl sniffed. "Katrine," she answered and Leia held her hands out in front of her, the girl taking hold of them as Poe wrapped his arm around Rosella's waist.

"Well, Katrine," Leia spoke in a soft tone, her eyes warm and kind as she tried to make the girl feel some form of comfort. "I want you to know that your mother and father were very brave people. They were strong and they were good. And do you want to know something?"

"What?" the girl wondered.

"They will always be with you," Leia said. "In here," she motioned to the girl's heart and smiled warmly. "There will always be a piece of them with you and they would be so proud of you. They would want you to be strong and brave, just like they were."

Rosella didn't know how the girl wasn't bursting into tears. She felt like sobbing at the words she was hearing. She felt like crying loudly and holding Katrine, almost as if that would make her pain go away. But she remained stood up, her head going to rest on Poe's shoulder as the pilot watched the small girl and vowed to do everything in his power to help her and all the others like her.

….

"She is a child," Rosella said as she sat besides Poe in the medical bay once more. She sat on the chair besides Poe as the two of them looked down to Finn. "Katrine is a child, Poe, and she has no one."

"That's not true," Poe said with a shake of his head. "She has the Resistance."

"But they are not her parents," Rosella pointed out, turning to glance to him.

"No, but we are family," Poe said. "Besides, I know that you will not let her be alone, Rose. I saw the way you were with her when you walked in…I saw the way you held her…how you tucked her into bed…"

"What else could I do for her?" Rosella said. "I need to make sure she is safe. I've failed too many children, Poe…Selene…my own baby…"

"Hey," Poe said before she could go back to her place of dangerous thought. "You have failed no one, do you understand me? You never could."

"I'm not going to fail her," Rosella whispered. "We need to find a way to get away from the First Order. We need to get to safety."

"I know," Poe exhaled loudly, leaning forwards and letting his hands coming to rest over his kneecaps. His brown leather jacket crumpled with the movement as Rosella moved a hand to his back, running it up and down before he turned to look to her.

"What's going on?" she wondered from him, sensing that there was something he was hiding from her. Well, perhaps not hiding, but not wanting to discuss.

"We're spread out on different cruisers…cargo ships…and we…I don't know how much fuel we really have. The First Order are right behind us, Rose. I don't know when they will appear, but I just know that they will. They have these ships…Dreadnaughts."

Rosella nodded. "They were in the process of designing the new and improved version years ago, but Armitage seemed more concerned with Starkiller Base. He spent most of his time on that."

"Yeah, well now that we've blown that up I think they've moved onto those ships," Poe said. "They're powerful, Rose. They blew up our base on D'Qar without even using all of their energy."

Rose nodded. "So what do we do?" she enquired from him. "We don't have the resources to go up against them, do we? We have nothing to challenge them."

Poe let his lips quirk and Rosella shook her head. Moving her hands to grab hold of his upper arms, she shook him gently as Poe's eyes widened and he looked to her with an intense stare as she bit down on her lip and glowered at him.

"If you say what I think you are about to say then so help me, Poe, but I will stun you myself," she warned him and Poe couldn't help but smirk at hearing her, nodding his head softly towards her.

"I need to take out the surface canons," Poe said to her. "These massive ships aren't able to deal with small fighter jets. If I take out those canons then we disarm them."

"Absolutely not," Rosella blanched, wondering if Finn could hear this conversation or if he was happy enough in his own world. She suspected the latter. She would rather be there. "Poe, it is a suicide mission."

"No, flying blindly in space is a suicide mission," Poe retorted to her, his hand going to sweep a piece of hair behind her ear. "We will run out of fuel and they will catch us. We can't let that happen."

"And I can't let you fly out there and risk your life against a machine that just obliterated an entire base," Rosella responded to him.

Poe gave her another small smile before moving to kiss her chastely. "You don't have a choice, Rose," he informed her. "I am doing this because it is the only way that the Resistance can survive. This is bigger than any of us…this is about hope surviving…"

Closing her eyes, Rosella shook her head softly before moving to kiss him on the lips, knowing that Poe spoke sense. But that didn't mean that she had to like it. She didn't like any of this.


	28. Chapter 28

Standing in the control room of the ship, Rosella stood next to Leia, unsure of whether or not she should be there. A part of her was scared to distraction, her mind a complete whirl as she thought about what Poe was about to do. He stood in front of a hologram of a Dreadnought, his hands moving over it and explaining to Leia and the rest of the squadron exactly what he was going to do.

BB-8 was by her feet, whirling and beeping on the spot at some of the things that Poe said. Only once he had finished with his plan did Rosella sink down to crouch down before BB-8, her hand moving over the curve of his head as he looked to her and beeped once.

"Promise me you will look after him, okay?" Rosella said to him. He gave out a high-pitched beep as Poe looked down and smiled at the sight. Rosella gave a soft laugh as she patted his head softly once more. "I know he is a reckless idiot, but I still want him back in one piece, alright?"

BB-8 beeped in agreement as Rosella moved back to her feet and looked to Poe. Leia had moved to peer out the large window of the bridge, wondering just how far behind the First Order were. She had no doubt that they would be with them sooner rather than later.

Poe watched Rosella for a moment, his hand going to hold onto her cheeks, cradling them softly before he smiled genuinely and moved closer to her. Pressing his lips against hers, he kissed her tenderly before he let his forehead press against hers.

"He will be on a ship," Poe told her and she knew exactly who he was talking about.

"I know," Rosella nodded her head. "And I need you…just…don't let him hurt you."

"Nothing he says or does will change anything," Poe promised her. "I know you."

"He can be poisonous," Rosella said. "If you do make contact with him then do not engage with him. Do not…just…do not let him goad you over me. I am not worth your energy in a fight with him."

"Hey," Poe said, the smirk back on his face. "If he wants to try and goad me then let him. I know what I have when I come back."

Rosella moved with haste then, kissing Poe quickly on the lips, her hands moving to pull at his curled black hair as she felt his hands press into the small of her back and bring her closer to him. It didn't matter that people could see them. Poe didn't care what people thought and Rosella was beginning to feel the same way. Kissing Poe, Rosella was acutely aware that this could be her final chance to be with him. She never knew what would happen to him on these missions. That terrified her.

"I love you," Poe said once he gasped for breath, his eyes closed. "Never forget that, you understand me?"

Nodding, Rosella felt her eyes widen and threaten to drop tears. She placed her hands to his cheeks, forcing him to look her in the eye. "Come back to me," she said, her tone one of pleading and demand. "Please."

"Always," Poe promised, kissing her once more before leaving.

The warmth from his body had gone as he left the bridge and Rosella watched him go, her hands hanging limply by her side. It was another moment before she felt a hand on the small of her back. Looking up, she saw Leia stood behind her, her eyes warm and the smile on her face kind.

"He will come back," Leia said.

"This plan is madness," Rosella responded to Leia with a small shake of her head. "Poe…going up against that Dreadnought…I know that he is a good pilot, but I know those ships. I know how they operate and I know how my husband thinks."

Leia nodded her head, understanding exactly what the girl was telling her. She moved her hand away from Rosella as the girl pushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear and looked onto the controls in front of them. She could see Poe's X-Wing was ready for action, the target beeping softly as other bombers prepared for movement.

"Your husband is not going to harm Poe," Leia told her.

"Armitage would kill him without thinking about it," Rosella responded. "You don't know him, General. I know him…I know who he is and what he would do. He…he's not the scared man I married."

"Scared?" Leia echoed and Rosella nodded her head.

"He wasn't always the man he is today," she said to the General, turning to look at her and away from the controls. "There was a time when he was under his father's thumb and he was scared about everything…well…most things…he just wanted to prove to everyone that he was strong…he wasn't weak like his father had made him think."

Leia pursed her lips before nodding her head. "But we all choose a path, Rosella."

"But your son?" Rosella wondered, knowing that she might have pushed things too far. "Do you not think that there is goodness inside of him? Even after everything?"

Leia looked away then. "My son is gone," Leia whispered in a soft tone, moving off and leaving Rosella stood at the control panel. She moved her hands to hold onto the edge of the panel as she bowed her head, her mind returning back to Armitage. She didn't know why she continued doing this to herself. She continued to think about him and how he used to be.

She knew that wasn't him now. The man she had married had gone. He had been rude and obnoxious back then, but she had hoped that he would change. She had seen glimmers of a man she thought that she could love. She had seen glimmers of a man she had hoped who would love her. But that man was gone. That man was well and truly gone.

…

"Yeah, I know, buddy," Poe spoke as BB-8 whirled about above him and they flew towards the ships in front of them. The First Order were closer than Poe had been to them in a long time and he had to admit that he was nervous. "But, I have had worse ideas than these."

BB-8 bleeped loudly once again and Poe chuckled. "Hey," he responded. "Only she can get away with calling me that."

BB-8 bleeped again. "Yeah, well she's pretty special to me, alright, buddy?"

BB-8 went silent then as Poe coughed once and then sought about making contact with the First Order, wondering just how badly this could go if he messed things up. He took a moment before he pressed the red button on his intercom, speaking softly and clearly.

It took a moment before the crackled line became clear.

"Hi, yeah, this is Poe Dameron," Poe spoke. "I'm calling for General Hux."

It was another few moments before the voice on the other end of the line spoke and Poe knew that he had to do his best not to lose his cool or his temper. Poe wasn't exactly good at remaining calm when someone riled him or said something he didn't particularly like. Poe was a man who thought with his emotions and not his head.

"Dameron," the harsh voice sounded into Poe's ears and he closed his eyes for a moment. "And what is it we can do for you?"

"Yeah," Poe said, thinking about Rosella. She was back on that ship and she was waiting for him. She was waiting for him to come back and so things had to go to plan. They had to go right for Rosella. "Well, I was just wondering, you know, if you happened to know much about that Dreadnought over there?"

There was another brief moment as silence as Poe saw his ship prepare for high speed and BB-8 did his bit. Poe tried to keep his breathing calm, knowing that he had to keep calm and do this for the Resistance. It was another moment before he heard Hux speak again.

"Is this about her?" he demanded and Poe furrowed his brows.

"Do not talk about her," Poe demanded from the man.

"Is it?" Hux demanded to know once more.

"No," Poe said.

"Then why are you here? Did she send you? Where is she-"

"-Why do you care?" Poe interrupted him, his voice harsh and demanding as he let his hands clench into fists and he did his best not to let his rage take hold of him. He didn't even want Hux mentioning her. "I know what you did to her. I know exactly what you did."

There was silence then before Hux spoke. "And do you know what she did to me?"

Poe went quiet then, wondering if he should respond or if this was another twisted game.

…

Rosella could hear everything that was being said as she sat at the back of the control room. Everyone was gathered around the control panels, waiting for the moment when Poe would make his move. The bomber squad were on standby should they be needed, but Leia didn't know if it would come to that. She would be happy just to see a Dreadnought destroyed.

Rosella had hoped that they would not bring her into the discussion, but those fears were soon brought to the surface when Armitage asked if this was about her. She could feel some people stare at her from the corner of their eyes as she looked down to the ground, her hands clenched together in between her knees. Squeezing her eyes tightly shut, she did her best not to feel too nervous as the two men spoke.

"And do you know what she did to me?"

Armitage's voice rang into her ears as there was silence in the control room.

"She swore to love and honour me," Armitage's voice was clear and crisp as Rosella gulped. "And she did for a little while, although I can imagine she has yet to tell you about that, has she? Or has she told you?"

"You ruined her," Poe managed to speak. "Whatever she was like…she is not that person…you ruined her but she is not that person now. She is stronger. She is better."

"And you think that the only person she has given herself to is you?" Hux continued his taunting and Rosella felt a lump in her throat as she heard him. She didn't know how much more of this she could handle. It took her another moment before she looked up. "She gave me everything at one time…she tried to make me love her. She would be dutiful…thoughtful…and you think that is all for you. Try to remember, Dameron, I shared her bed at one stage too."

Rosella couldn't listen to anymore. She stood up and moved through the control room before she felt Leia grab onto her arm. She stopped in her tracks and turned to look to the General.

"Do not let him bother you," the General urged.

"Yeah," Poe's voice entered the room once more. "There's only one issue now, pal."

"And that is?"

"I love her more than you ever could and that's not going to change," Poe spoke and before Hux could respond, Poe snapped out. "BB-8, hit it!"

Rosella heard nothing else except for the blasting of canons as she watched the screen and her eyes remained fixed on Poe's X-Wing as it flew through the sky, twisting and turning continuously as everyone in the control room waited with bated breath to see if the mission was pulled off.

"He's still flying," Rosella whispered, noting how TIE fighters were now on his trail. It was another moment before Poe came over the intercom.

"We need the bombers in here now," Poe said. "General, we need to bring this thing down."

"No," Leia responded. "What I need is for you to get back here."

"General, when are we ever going to have a chance to bring down one of those things? I've destroyed all its surface canons."

"And there are more where they came from," Rosella was the one to snap, refusing to let Poe do this. "If you bring one down then they will just show up with another one. Besides, there are other ships there that can fire on you just as easily."

"We can have cover for the bombers," Poe said. "Listen to me, we need to do this."

"Commander Dameron-"

Leia began to speak, but the line went dead and Rosella's eyes widened as she vowed to yell at Poe if he made it back. He had turned off his communication system and was now flying solo. It was another moment before Rosella looked to Leia who was silently fuming. She had no idea what was happening, nor did she have a chance to find out. Stood in the doorway to the bridge was Katrine. The little girl was dressed in pants and a top, her hair pulled into a bobble. Moving towards her, Rosella looked to her.

"What are you doing here, honey?" she wondered from the girl.

"Why is everyone running around?" Katrine wondered and Rosella took hold of her hand, leading her from the bridge and back towards the small dormitories.

"We're fine," Rosella said to her. "It's just that some Resistance pilots are trying to bring down some big ships of the First Order. Everything is going to be okay."

"You don't need to lie to me," Katrine said as Rosella furrowed her brow and peered down to her. "I know that they have more ships than we do. They have more of everything."

"That doesn't mean that they are going to win," Rosella said to her as the girl shrugged.

"It doesn't mean we will either."

…

Katrine's words still echoed in Rosella's ears as she made her way back to the hanger after receiving word that Poe had returned. The Dreadnought had been destroyed, but at a large cost to the Resistance. Leia was fuming and Rosella knew that Poe would have to face her. But first he would have to face her.

She saw him climbing from his ship, BB-8 being pulled out as the pilot handed over his helmet and climbed down the steps. He saw Rosella stood in the doorway, her arms folded over her chest and her gaze harsh and narrow.

BB-8 whirled and Poe rolled his eyes. "I know that she is angry judging by that expression on her face."

Moving towards her, Poe expected her to yell at him. Instead she said nothing. Her gaze was still harsh as she watched him.

"Did you want to be a hero?" Rosella wondered and Poe's brows furrowed, confusion well and truly taking hold of him.

"What are you talking about?"

"Did you want to bring down the Dreadnought to be a hero?" she demanded from him.

Poe dropped his hands to his hips. "I wanted to bring down the Dreadnought because we would never get a chance like this again," Poe informed her and she rolled her eyes at hearing him. "The people…everyone who went out there is a hero."

"Dead," Rosella snapped the word. "Everyone who went out there is now dead, Poe."

Poe looked taken back as Rosella shook her head, her hands moving around frantically as she watched him and he continued to glance at her with intensity.

"People died doing that…they died bringing that Dreadnought down and you could have been one of them. You could have died and then what? How many people are going to die?"

Poe shrugged. "I don't know, Rosella," he answered. "But what I do know is that we can't just run away from them. If we keep running then they will catch us and they will kill us. Do you not see that?"

"What I see is you refusing to follow orders and do what you want," Rosella snapped back. "If you…just…just think about things, Poe…for once…"

Poe was about to yell back at her, but she had turned on her heel and was already walking away from. He watched her go, not bothering to call after her. He would give her time to calm down before he tried to reason her. He just didn't know how long she would need.

….

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	29. Chapter 29

Poe Dameron was a man who was used to conflict. As a pilot making challenging calls, he often came into contact with them. He could often make sure people understood his point of view just as he understood theirs. He would try to be reasonable, but more times than not, that did not work. He was hot heated and he often didn't think without acting. He was a man of action, not someone who sat back.

However, when it came to conflict, he could usually resolve it just by what he did. He was used to doing the right thing. But arguing with Rosella was completely different. He hated arguing with her and he could think of nothing worse than her being angry with him. They worked better when they were as a team. But right now, she was still annoyed with him.

He moved his hand to the chain around his neck, feeling his mother's ring that sat against his chest. He pulled it out from his shirt and fiddled with it in his fingertips. He had thought long and hard about giving the ring to Rosella. He wanted to give it to her, to prove to her that no one else would come closer to the way he felt about her.

On the other hand, he worried how she would react to it. She was already married to the General and she had already worn a ring on her finger. Was she ready for such a big commitment to Poe? Did she want to commit? Poe suspected she did, but there were times when he worried he might scare her away. He couldn't do that to her. He loved her, but he was tentative around her.

After he had argued with her, he had thought about leaving her alone, but he didn't want to do that. Instead he had followed her, but he had found himself distracted as soon as he spotted a familiar figure roaming the hallways. Furrowing his brow, Poe saw Finn moving towards him, still dressed in his medical suit and looking disorientated.

"Finn!" Poe called out to him.

Rosella had been a few paces ahead of Poe when she heard him call out the familiar name. Standing still, she turned her head over her shoulder in time to see Poe catch Finn as he fell to the floor. Spinning on her heel, she moved back to the two of them, falling to her knees besides Finn.

"Finn, are you alright?" she wondered from him as he took deep breaths.

"Fine," he said to them. "Just tired. How long have I been asleep?"

Rosella smiled to him. "A while," she answered. "Don't worry. We need to get you back to the medical bay."

"No," Finn shook his head. "I need to see Rey."

Looking to Poe, Rosella caught his eye and he watched her for another second before helping Finn to his feet.

"That might be difficult, buddy," he admitted as Rosella took hold of Finn by his other arm, letting him drape it over her shoulders as he walked forwards, supported by the couple. "Rey has gone to find Skywalker. We managed to put the map together and General Organa sent her to bring him back."

"But she is safe?" Finn continued to fret.

"She is," Rosella said. "The General is keeping an eye on her."

"Okay," Finn said, seeming to process all that he was hearing from them. "So why were you two yelling at each other in the corridor?"

Rosella didn't even meet Poe's gaze. Instead she kept on looking away, her eyes narrowed off to the side as she heard Poe mumble.

"Again, another long story."

…

"I need to go and report to the General," Poe informed Rosella once they had left Finn back in the medical bay to be discharged. The couple had fallen into step besides each other as they left. Rosella had her arms folded over her chest while her eyes remained fixed in front of her. Poe, on the other hand, was looking at her, longing for them to resolve this argument before he went off.

"I see," Rosella said to him and Poe sighed.

Moving his hand to his forehead, he let his fingers run along the skin there. He shook his head and stood still as Rosella also stopped.

"Is this how it is going to be?" Poe enquired from her. "I make one decision you don't like and you go cold on me?"

"Cold?" Rosella echoed back to him. "Poe, I am so unbelievably upset and angry that you have no idea."

"I told you what had to be done," Poe shrugged to her. "We need to bring those massive ships down before they kill us. What other option did I have? We jump to light speed again and they follow us and use it to kill us?"

"Do you not get it?" Rosella snapped at him, moving closer to him, her eyes set on his face. "People have died, Poe. People have died and you could have been one of them. You could have died…you could have left me…people did die out there."

"And they would die if we did nothing," Poe responded to her. "You know that, Rosella. If we don't attack them then they attack us. Death is inevitable. People are going to die and there is nothing we can do to stop that."

"But you were nearly one of them!" Rosella snapped at him, finally moving to shake his shoulders. "You were nearly one of them and I can't bear the thought of you dying. Why could you not just turn around and come back? Why could you not just come back to safety when I asked you?"

Poe was slowly understanding where she was coming from. He could see that her anger came from a place of fear. It came from a place of worry. Of course, he could not blame her. He would feel the same if the roles were reversed. He was certain of that. It took a moment before he dared to take hold of her hands inside of his, wondering if he could soothe her.

"This is bigger than any individual," he said in a soft voice. "It is bigger than me and you…bigger than anything…this is about the future. It is about making sure that there is a future for kids like Katrine."

Rosella looked away at hearing that, her eyes closing as Poe moved a hand to her cheek, drawing her gaze back to his. Looking into his eyes, she let her hands move with haste to wrap around his neck, clinging onto him as Poe took hold of her waist, holding it tenderly as he felt her face burrow onto his shoulder.

"I know it is difficult, Rose," Poe promised her. "And I know that it is dangerous, but everything my parents did was dangerous. They did it for me. They did it so I could have a future free from the Empire…just as we have to ensure the same thing for future generations. They cannot grow up with the likes of the First Order."

"But that doesn't mean you need to be reckless," Rosella whispered. "You don't need to act so irrationally. Poe, I need you to understand that."

Poe nodded. "I can try."

…

Armitage didn't know how to feel. He didn't know how much more he could take, if truth was known. The First Order were constantly closing in on the Resistance, but they were doing everything in their power to fly away and hide. Of course, they had no idea of the powers that the First Order had. They were able to track them through hyperspace.

The worst part was that Hux knew his wife was on board. He knew that he was close to her at all times. It was almost as if he could sense her proximity. He wanted her back and he was lying if he said he was not bothered. He wanted her back particularly more since the Supreme Leader had constantly hounded him.

"General Hux," someone called to him as he stood on the bridge and watched the Resistance jump to hyperspace. "General Snoke is summoning you."

"Excellent," Hux said, gulping. "I shall take the call in my chambers."

As he turned on his heel, he came face to face with the hologram of Snoke. He almost felt himself jump, but he remained composed, nodding his head and greeting the creature with respect.

"Supreme Leader," Hux nodded his head. "Good news, we are-"

"-General," Snoke interrupted him, his voice low and dangerous. "There is no good news. They have managed to escape, have they not? All because you were distracted with that pilot. If you had not engaged in conversation with him about your treacherous wife then you would have been focused."

Hux shook his head. "Supreme Leader, that is not-"

But Hux had no other chance to explain as he felt himself being flung to the floor. The Supreme Leader used his powers to toss him to the floor, keeping him there as he spoke in a demanding voice. Hux felt humiliation flow through him. He was being watched by all of his inferiors as the Supreme Leader ruined his reputation.

"Your wife will be captured, General, and when she is, you will be the one to end her," he warned the General. "And only then can you move on."

Hux felt the grip on him weaken and he gasped for breath. Moving to his feet, Hux looked around, his glare challenging anyone to question him. Thankfully, no one bothered. He moved with haste through the ship and towards his chambers, his mind going back to the one person who he thought could make everything right.

 _Six Years Ago_

 _Armitage was having another nightmare. Rosella had seen it happen multiple times before. She moved to switch on the light that sat on the bedside table. She let the light enter the room before she moved towards her husband. She let her hand grip hold of his shoulder, shaking him._

" _Armitage," she whispered to him in a soft tone. "Armitage, wake up."_

 _It was a while before Armitage opened his eyes, sweat pouring down his forehead as he bolted upright, gasping for breath. Rosella moved quickly, her arms wrapping around him and holding him to her as she closed her eyes and felt her husband's hands move to grip onto her arm._

" _It's okay," she whispered into his ear as he pressed the side of his face against the crook of her neck. "It was just a dream."_

" _No it wasn't," Armitage said in a low voice. "It was real, Rosella. It was all real."_

 _She let her brow furrow as she heard him, wondering if he was going to explain anything else. He moved from her grip then, his hands going through his hair and slicking it back as he leant against the headboard of the bed and she remained seated by his side, looking to him._

" _He used to lock me in this cupboard," Armitage whispered. "When we lived on Arkanis as a child he would lock me in this small cupboard if I did something wrong…if I looked at him in a strange manner…spoke to him…he would lock me in there and I would cry. I would sob and I would beg for him to let me out of the darkness."_

 _Rosella felt horror fun through her, chilling her to the bone at the sound of his words as he let out a dark chuckle._

" _He made me who I am," Armitage said. "He made me stronger. He thought that he would ruin me."_

" _No," Rosella said with haste. "No child should be forced to endure such horror, Armitage."_

" _Perhaps not," he agreed with her, "but look at where I am and where he is. I have the power now, Rose. I have everything he ever wanted."_

 _Shaking her head, Rosella moved to take hold of his cheek, cupping it softly as she looked into his eyes. "He should never have hurt you," was all she managed to say. "All a child needs is love, Armitage."_

 _Armitage scoffed. "He always said I was unlovable. A bastard child can never be loved."_

" _He was wrong," Rosella said to him and Armitage looked at her intensely then, wondering if she was going to continue speaking._

 _She said nothing further to him, keeping silent before chewing on the inside of her cheek, wondering if he needed more form her. Would he demand for her to say it? Would he demand for her to profess her love to him? Rosella didn't know. All she knew was that she had an urge to hold onto him and wonder if she could change him. Moving to kiss him chastely, she felt him deepen the kiss and she realised this was what he needed. He needed someone to love him; someone to make him feel worthwhile._

 _Rosella just didn't know if she could be that person._

…

A/N: Let me know what you think!


	30. Chapter 30

Rosella sat besides Poe as they listened to Leia. She was in the midst of scolding Poe after slapping him across the face. Rosella had winced at the sight of Poe's face turning slightly to the side as Leia confessed her disappointment with Poe. Rosella had stood behind the pilot, hands folded over her chest and her eyes fixed on the two arguing figures.

"You're demoted," she said simply to him and Rosella let her eyes widen as Poe moved to stop her from leaving and Rosella pursed her lips as Leia's gaze caught hers.

"Hang on," Poe called out. "When else would we have had a chance to destroy one of those things?"

"We lost half of our fleet," Leia said, her voice rasping. "Poe, I need you to understand that not everything can be solved by jumping in an X-Wing and blowing things up."

Poe sighed, knowing that he would be in trouble, but he had hoped that he wouldn't be demoted. He had only done what he had thought best and he still thought that he had done the right thing. Leia didn't entirely know what Poe had been thinking, but he had disobeyed ordered and she couldn't have someone in charge who disobeyed her.

"You're a good pilot, Poe," Leia said in a soft voice. "You're a good man too, but you have so much to learn. You know that. Deep down, you know that."

Poe remained silent, biting down on his lip as he did his best to keep silent. It was only at that moment when a loud noise of beeps echoed throughout the room. Looking to the control panel, Leia listened with intrigue as someone spoke.

"They've tracked us."

Looking to the window, Rosella moved closer to it and peered out the window, well aware that her husband would be on one of those ships that had just appeared. It was another second before she felt Poe's hand on the small of her back as he stood besides her.

"How have they tracked us through hyperspace?" Rosella whispered.

"I don't know," Poe told her before turning his head over his shoulder to look to Leia. "Permission to go and blow something up?"

"Granted," Leia said.

Before Poe could move off, Rosella had grabbed hold of his wrist, stopping him from going anyway. She kept hold of him as Poe bent down, pressing his lips against hers.

"You've only just come back," she whispered to him as Poe began to move off, Rosella following him as she kept her hand inside of his and BB-8 rolled ahead of them. "Poe, this is impossible. They shouldn't be able to find us this quickly."

"I know," Poe assured her, running down the corridors with her one step behind him. "I don't know how they are doing this, Rose, but I do know that we need to stop them."

It was then when the ship violently shook to one side. Rosella fell over her own feet, tripping over and only remaining from falling flat on her face because of Poe's hold on her. He whirled around and bent down to move his hands to her arms, but the ship shook again and both of them tumbled to the ground, falling to the side and against the wall.

"Okay…" Poe whispered in a soft voice. "Rose…I need you to get to safety."

"No," Rosella responded. "I need to find Katrine and Finn. I need to make sure they're safe. Besides, where is safe, Poe? They're firing at the ship."

Poe nodded at her and hauled her up to her feet as they came to the hanger. As they approached the open doors, Rosella saw the familiar blast from a TIE fighter moving into the open space. Looking to the people in there, her eyes widened as BB-8 rolled towards Poe's ship.

"No!" Rosella screamed as the light grew brighter and Poe realised what was happening. He saw Jessika by her ship and shook his head, rushing towards the hanger.

"Jessika!" he screamed her name. "Pava!"

As she caught his eye, it was too late. The blast had hit the hanger and fire had erupted in the room. Poe flew back from the force of it and BB-8 rolled out the hanger, falling with a heavy thud. Rosella moved to Poe, kneeling down by his body and moving her hands to his arms as he forced himself to sit up, his eyes looking into the fire for any sign of Jessika. There was nothing.

"Poe," Rosella whispered his name. "Poe…come on…we need to move."

"Jessika," Poe whispered.

"I know," she said to him as he looked to her. "I know."

Poe remained worried as he forced himself to his feet and looked to her as she stood by his side. He was in a daze and Rosella could see that. Taking hold of him by the hand, she moved him away from the fire and down the corridors, but the ship continued to shake violently. It was only by luck when she saw a small figure stood in the midst of pilots who were running around. The little girl looked scared as she wondered where to go.

"Katrine!" Rosella screeched her name and the little girl rushed towards her, flinging her arms around Rosella's waist and clinging onto her as Poe did his best to move away from the image of Jessika at her jet as the flames engulfed her.

"I was looking for you!" Katrine sobbed. "I didn't know where you were."

"I'm here, sweetheart," Rosella whispered down to her. "Come on, we need to move."

Taking hold of Katrine by the hand, she dragged her away as pilots entered another hanger, but there was no point. It took moments before Rosella felt the ship shake much more violently than before. Looking out the window, she stopped moving as Katrine remained stood by her side and Poe behind her, his hand above him as he leant against the glass. Shaking his head back and forth, he didn't know what to think as he saw the control room blasted apart.

"No…" Rosella whispered.

"The General is on that bridge," Poe said in a hushed tone.

"They've been sucked out," Rosella stated the obvious. "How can we get them back?"

"We can't," Poe said. "They'll not survive in space. No one can."

"But there must be a way," Rosella said.

"There isn't," Poe said in a soft voice. "There…" he trailed off as soon as he saw a particularly strange sight. "What the…"

In the distance, they could see a familiar figure in space, her hand stretched out and towards the ship. Rosella's eyes widened at the sight as she struggled to believe what she was seeing. She bit down on the inside of her cheek as she saw General Organa become larger. How was that possible?

"The Force," Poe seemed to answer the unspoken question and Rosella wondered how that was possible. "We need to get her back in."

"She's using the Force to fly?" Katrine asked, her voice wavering on a tone of disbelief. Rosella nodded her head as Poe rushed towards the door, his hand on the button as other rushed to follow him. Rosella stood out of the way, holding Katrine by her shoulders as the two of them watched on.

Leia was brought back into the ship and in a matter of seconds a medical team were there. They helped to lay Leia on a gurney, reading her vitals as Poe followed them back to where Rosella was stood, his eyes not once leaving Leia until he realised that he would be more of a hindrance than a help. Standing besides Rosella, he let his hand move to the small of her back as she turned to look up to him.

"She will make it through," Rosella said, her voice confident. "She has to."

"How did she even do that?" Poe wondered, his voice soft but questioning. "She should have died as soon as she was sucked into space."

"But she didn't," Rosella responded, not entirely wanting to talk about death in front of Katrine. "She will be fine. I'm more concerned about how they followed us here."

"You're not the only one," Poe agreed.

"They must have a tracking device," Katrine said and both adults looked down to the little girl. She peered back up to them, turning to face them and look between them. "Ships have tracking devices."

"But not through hyperspace," Poe said and Katrine shrugged.

"Why not?" she wondered from him. "What if it is just a better tracking device?"

Poe hated to admit that made sense. Nodding his head, he couldn't quite believe that he hadn't thought of that. A child had to tell him. He felt his head shake back and forth before a smile broke on his face and he moved a hand down to ruffle the little girl's hair. She almost looked proud. She knew Poe Dameron and the stories about him. Her parents had told her everything.

"Good work," he said to her.

"Maybe you should go and tell someone and I'll take her somewhere to rest?" Rosella suggested and Poe nodded his head, kissing her quickly before rushing away.

….

"Leia is still critical and Admiral Holdo has taken charge," Poe informed Rosella as the two of them sat in his quarters that evening. Katrine was laid in the bed, sleeping soundly and tucked up underneath a blanket. Rosella and Poe were perched in the window seat.

Rosella was closest the window, her legs stretched on the seat in front of her while Poe had one leg in front of him and the other dangling down and on the floor, his arm around Rosella.

"She wants a meeting in another hour," Poe spoke in a soft tone so that Katrine didn't wake. "The First Order haven't managed to track us through hyperspace this time, but what the girl said made sense."

Rosella rolled her eyes. "Her name is Katrine," she responded. "And she is right. There must be something clever on one of the ships for them to be able to track us. My bet is the one that Armitage is on."

Poe nodded. "I don't know what to suggest though," he responded to her. "We can hardly go and infiltrate the ship."

"Correct," Rosella said. "I imagine their shields are even more advanced and would detect the first sign of movement after the incident on Starkiller Base."

"So what do we do?" Poe asked.

"I don't know," she sighed softly. "We hardly have anymore jumps left. They…they're closing in on us and we need to get out of here. We just need to get out of here."

"Evacuation?" Poe queried, his brows furrowed together. "Rose, I don't know if that is the answer. They will still be able to find us."

Rosella scoffed softly and closed her eyes, moving to let her head rest against Poe's shoulders as he let his thumb move up and down her shoulder gently. "There is no answer," she whispered. "Don't you just wish we could go back to how we were a week ago? We were just on an island…nothing but us…"

Poe's lips quirked as he heard her. "Yeah," he responded, moving to rest his cheek on the top of her head. "But we can't keep running forever. Besides, I think there is a little girl over there who needs you."

Opening her eyes once more, Rosella looked over to Katrine as the girl laid on her side, hands stuffed underneath her pillow. "I…I'm just trying to do the right thing for her," Rosella whispered. "I couldn't look after my own child and all of those in the First Order…but I know that nothing will erase that. I know that I can't be forgiven for that-"

"-Stop it," Poe interrupted her.

"Why?" she wondered from him. "It's true, Poe. I shouldn't be forgiven, either."

"Yes, you should." Poe replied. "Because you have done so much since that time, Rose. You need to stop focusing on the past. Katrine needs you and you need to realise that you're not a bad person."

She let out a soft sight, burrowing closer against Poe and holding him too, her hand going to take hold of his. "You always see the good in me, Poe Dameron," she whispered to him.

He chuckled softly. "I need you to see it in yourself." He responded. "Besides, you're stuck with me now, Rose."

She took her turn to chuckle. "Yeah, I kind of gathered that."

"Really?" Poe wondered, the weight of the ring around his neck seeming to intensify as his mouth dried out and he wondered if now was the time to do what he was going to do. "Well, if that's the case then I think I should ask you something."

"Oh?" she wondered.

"Yeah," Poe said, moving his free hand to pull the ring from his neck, lifting the chain over his head. "Then I guess I should ask you to marry me."

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	31. Chapter 31

Rosella did her best not to look too perplexed at what she was hearing from Poe. Chewing down on her lip as she watched him hold the ring out to her, she continued to watch it. Poe's eyes remained on her as he did his best not to seem too worried by the fact that she wasn't answering his question. Finally she spoke after a large gulp, her hands in her lap as she rubbed them together, anxiousness taking hold of her.

"Poe…I'm already married," she whispered to him. "I have a husband."

"That can be annulled, Rose," Poe said to her with a shrug of his shoulders as she did her best not to seem too downtrodden over what they were discussing. "Marriage…divorce…you can divorce him and be with me, Rose. I want to marry you. I want to show you what marriage can be like…how happy we can be."

Rosella let her lips quirk as she moved a hand to take hold of Poe's hand. She squeezed it tightly in her grip and he watched her for a few moments before he saw her look down, her eyes closing as he realised that he might have pushed things too far. Rosella loved him. He knew that. He just didn't know if she was ready for marriage. What if he had been too hasty?

"Poe, I love you," Rosella said to him. "And I want to be with you forever. I want to be with you for the rest of my life…but I want to do things properly. I want to marry you when I am able to."

"And I want that too," Poe agreed with a quick nod of his head in her direction. "I do not want to rush into things, Rose. I want to do this at your pace, but I just want you…okay…perhaps I shouldn't have said marriage…but…a promise to be with me."

Rosella nodded. "You already have that," she assured him. "There is no one else, Poe. There never will be. I will marry you eventually, but we will do things right."

Nodding, Poe seemed to agree with her. "I still want you to wear my ring though, Rose," he said to her and she felt a sense of nervousness again as she bit down on her lip once more and moved slowly to kiss him on the cheek, the motion tender as she folded her hand around his that was holding the ring.

"Give it to me when we agree to get married."

"No," Poe said with a shake of his head. "Keep it with you, please, my mother would have wanted you to have it. She would have adored you, Rosella. Wear it for me?"

Rosella nodded her head then as Poe slipped the ring onto her finger, admiring the sight of it. Closing her hand around his, he kissed her knuckles as she smiled to him, her hand moving to roam over his cheek. He slipped down slightly, kissing her chastely on the lips and closing his eyes, knowing that one day they would be free from all of this mess. He only hoped that day would come sooner rather than later.

…

Hux had been brooding in his chamber ever since the last attack on the rebel scum. Kylo had led the fleet and done enough damage to the ship to make sure that it was on its last legs, but there was a part of Armitage that was worried. He was worried for Rosella and he hated himself for even admitting it. He was perched on the bottom of his bed, his head buried in his hands as he thought about his wife.

He wondered if she had been injured during the attack. Had Kylo seen to it that she had been injured, or worse, killed? Had she been one of the unfortunate ones to have been sucked into space? Armitage felt his stomach churn at the thought. Rosella was still his wife. She had made her choice and he knew that. She had decided to go against the First Order, but that still did not stop him from remembering all of the times she had been by his side.

"General Hux, Kylo Ren requests a meeting."

The intercom buzzed and Hux moved from his bed and wandered out into the corridor to see Kylo stood there, dressed in his usual outfit. His mask covered his face and Armitage almost rolled his eyes at the sight of him. He was always overly dramatic.

"The Resistance are still in front of us," Ren declared. "We can catch them up by tomorrow."

"And should we?" Hux enquired. "I trust not much more damage can be done to their ship. They will run out of fuel and they know we are following them."

"Which makes them even easier to destroy," Kylo said, his emotions unreadable from underneath his helmet. "And is that the issue, General Hux? I know that your wife is still on board that ship. I understand Snoke has asked for her to be brought on board for you to finish her."

"Careful, Ren," Hux seethed.

"Why?" Ren wondered. "We both know that you are too weak to do what needs to be done. Your insolent wife has gone against you so many times, yet you still defend her. Sentiment will be your downfall."

"Sentiment," Hux hissed the word. "Do you truly think that I care?"

"I know that you do," Ren said to him. "But only for her. You only care for her."

"Stop it," Armitage demanded. "You are not to mention her again. Do you understand me? Rosella is none of your concern, nor are you to discuss her with anybody else."

Ren chuckled. He nodded his head. "See to it that she doesn't get in your head and ruin you."

Armitage said nothing back as Ren stalked off. He went back into his chamber and took his seat on his bed before standing up and feeling a sense of rage take hold of him. He moved into the wardrobe in his chamber and found the battered copy of the book he had kept with him all that time. It was the book she had given him for his birthday. It was the book on planets. They had sat and read it, looking to the bright planets above them and identifying them.

Holding the book in his fingertips, he threw it across the room, a sense of anguish taking hold of him as he closed his eyes and sunk to the floor, cursing his wife for ever entering his life.

…

Poe didn't trust Holdo and he didn't pretend anything otherwise. He had watched the woman tell them that they needed to evacuate, even after he had told them that the First Order were tracking them through hyperspace. That was why he had devised a plan to go against Holdo. He had spoken to Rose and Finn and they had agreed with him. They were going to go and attempt to find a man who would be able to disable the tracker. Of course, telling Rosella that had been difficult.

"Are you insane?" Rosella demanded from Poe after she had finished reading a bedtime story to Katrina. She had left her to sleep before heading into the hallway to talk to Poe in hushed tones. He had told her of the plan and she had rolled her eyes. "Finn should still be recovering and who even is Rose?"

"An engineer," he answered simply. "Listen, Rose, you know as well as I do that we need to escape them. We are burning fuel with each passing moment and they are following us. The First Order know where we are. We can't escape them so long as they know."

Rosella rolled her eyes at hearing him again. "And the way to do it is to send off two people to track a man who we probably cannot trust and infiltrate the First Order? That is the most ridiculous plan!"

"So is evacuating," Poe responded to her. "We will have no chance against them in small ships. They'll blow us up as soon as they catch us up."

"But this plan is ludicrous!" Rosella hissed, her voice full of rage as she did her best to keep her voice slightly hushed. "Poe, we stand no chance either way and the fact that you have gone against Holdo is deeply worrying, Poe."

"She wouldn't listen to me."

"So you just disobeyed her?"

"What was I supposed to do if someone doesn't listen to me?"

Dropping her hands to her hips, she cocked her head to the side and shot him a look as if to ask 'seriously'? "So you just disobey orders because someone doesn't listen to you? You know, that doesn't make you automatically right, Poe."

Poe pointed between himself and Rosella. "Why do I feel as though I am the one being chastised here?"

"Maybe because you should be?" she suggested to him. "Poe, if she finds out what you have done then what do you think she will do? Give you a pat on the back and say well done, thanks for going against me?"

"I think she should if my plan works."

"Ugh," Rosella grunted out of frustration. "Sometimes you are just so intolerable, do you know that? You make it so difficult…you make everything so difficult. It's infuriating."

Poe shrugged his shoulders. "I did what I thought was right and I told you because I trust you. I trust you more than anyone else on this ship, Rose."

Letting out a deep sigh, Rosella nodded her head and moved towards Poe, taking hold of his cheek in her palm as she looked to him and he moved his hand on top of hers, holding her fingers tightly inside of his. She said nothing for a few moments before she felt his hand come to rest on the back of her neck, his fingers tangling in the curls of hair that sat there. She remained mute before leaning forwards and kissing him on the cheek.

"I trust you, Poe," she said to him. "You know that I will always trust you…but…that doesn't mean that everyone else will and it doesn't mean that you have made the right choice. I trust that you think you have, but in this case, I don't know."

Poe almost snapped out in anger as he shook his head and dropped her from his grip. Moving his hands to his hips, the leather jacket he wore bunched up under his movements as Rosella felt the urge to yell at him and beg him to see sense.

"You are basically sending two people out to bring down the First Order," she said, trying to make him see reason. "You need to tell the General what you have done. We need to be working together and not against each other."

Poe shook his head. "She thinks I'm just a stupid fly boy with no idea," Poe responded.

"Then prove her wrong," Rosella urged from him, stepping forwards to take hold of his face in her fingertips. "Don't act the way she wants you to act. Talk to her and show her that you know more than she thinks you know. Do not go behind her back and deceive her. That is the way things are done in the First Order…not in the Resistance."

Poe hated it when Rosella spoke sense. He knew that was exactly what she was doing right now, but he hated to admit it. A deep sigh escaped him as he shrugged his shoulders towards her and watched her smooth her thumbs over his cheekbones. She had a way of calming him down and he knew it. He was hot headed, but when it came to Rosella, he knew she only wanted the best for him.

"And if she does not listen to me again?"

Rosella shrugged. "Hopefully it will not come to that," was all she offered him and he grunted a response, looking to the side and nodding.

"I will talk to her for you, but I'm not promising miracles."

"I'm not asking for any," Rosella quipped back quickly, moving to brush her lips over his. "Go. I'll be here when you come back. No doubt we have woken Katrine with our yelling."

"Probably," Poe said. "Go to her. I'll be back soon."

"Of course, fly boy," she said slyly and Poe watched her smirk, despite the situation.

His own lips arched upwards too as he walked away, wondering how it was possible she still made him smile despite knowing the future that they faced. Shaking his head, he scratched his neck as he thought about the woman he was determined to marry one day. Then again, he had no idea Hux would do everything in his power to stop him.

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	32. Chapter 32

Rosella could see that Poe was in a foul mood as soon as he returned to their small room. Katrina was still sleeping soundly as Poe entered the room, hands tugging through his hair. Rosella moved with haste, grabbing hold of him by the arm and dragging him back to the corridor. She continued to pull him down the corridor, her hand tightly gripping his leather clad arm before they came to the small room that was used as a meeting space for the generals.

Opening the door, she entered into the room and Poe followed her. He shook his head in her direction before flapping his arms by his side. Rosella took a seat on the table, her feet moving to rest on a leather chair as she folded her arms into her lap and looked to Poe. He looked to Rosella, his hand pointing to the door.

"Do you know what she did?" he demanded from Rosella.

"I assume we are talking about Holdo?" she asked from him and he scoffed but nodded his head.

"She has no idea," Poe snapped. "She took pleasure in reminding me that I was demoted to Captain. Her plan is ridiculous, Rose. She is going to get us all killed. She is going to let us continue to lose fuel. She wants us to keep going ahead."

"And what is the other option, Poe?" Rosella wondered from him. "I heard over the intercom what happened to the Anodyne. It ran out of fuel and was blown up."

"And that is exactly what is going to happen to us," Poe said, hands tugging his hair. "She thinks that we should keep going until we are almost out of fuel. She wants us to make our escape then…in the smaller transportations…"

"And what do you think?" Rosella wondered of him.

"I think she is leading them straight to us," Poe said simply. "I think that she is going to get us killed, but she will not listen to me. She ignored me. She thinks I am nothing but a fly-boy. She thinks I am useless."

"Poe, I doubt that is true," Rosella said, holding a hand out towards him and urging him forwards towards her.

Poe walked towards her and sat down on the table besides her, sighing softly as he let his hand move to hold onto hers. Rosella kissed the back of his hand, looking to him as she moved her other hand to his cheek, pulling his gaze towards her before she moved to kiss him chastely.

"We need to fight, Rose," Poe said, pulling back from her and looking her in the eye. "We need to fight them. We cannot keep running."

"But we cannot keep fighting," Rosella responded, stroking his cheek softly, her thumb roaming over his cheekbone. "We lost too many lives in the last attack. We cannot keep doing that or there will be no one left. Perhaps escaping is the only way? Perhaps there is a logic behind Holdo's plan?"

Poe shook his head at her, moving his cheek from her grip and looking off to the side, grinding his teeth together. He moved to his feet and began pacing once more. Rosella had seen Poe agitated before, but this was a different kind of agitation. She said nothing as she watched him continue to wander up and down the small meeting room. Slipping down to her feet, she folded her arms over her chest.

"Poe, you cannot do anything," she said to him. "Holdo is in charge now and that is all there is to it. What else can you do? You have sent Finn and Rose on a mission against the First Order…a mission I do not know if they can handle…and if that is the case then all we can do is follow the orders we are given."

"And if we decided not to?" Poe asked and Rosella shook her head with haste.

She moved closer to Poe, holding a hand up to stop him from talking any further. Shaking her head with haste, she looked to him as she chewed the inside of her cheek. Poe shrugged in her direction, his head tilted to the side as he spoke to her:

"Perhaps it is what needs to be done," Poe said to her. "Perhaps we need to rebel."

"No," Rosella said, continuously shaking her head. "I am not hearing this, Poe. I am not listening to this."

"Just think about it, Rose," Poe urged from her, taking hold of her by the shoulders. "There are plenty others who think the same as I do. I know it. I know who they are. They will agree with me."

Rosella pushed him from her. "Do you listen to anything that I say?" she demanded from him. "I told you to trust Holdo and talk to her and now…what? Now you want a mutiny? You want to go against her? Where do you think that will leave you?"

"Hopefully alive which is better than what she is offering," Poe snapped back at Rosella.

She held a hand up and began moving to the door. "I am not doing this with you, Poe," she said to him. "I am not arguing with you over this. I am not having another argument again. All we do is argue."

"Because you are not listening to me!"

"And that is the point!" Rosella said, feeling her throat clench, as her voice grew hoarse. "You think that I should always listen to you! You think that you are always right, but that is not always the case, is it? You have been wrong before and you will be wrong again."

"I am not doing this," Poe was the one to snap then as he moved with haste and left her alone in the room. She didn't even bother to call after him. Instead she sunk down into a chair, burying her head into her hands and sniffing as she felt anger and sadness course through her.

She didn't know how she should feel, but she suspected it should not be like this. She suspected she should not be feeling this way towards Poe. He wanted the best for them and Rosella knew that. He wanted them to live and be safe. The only problem was that Rosella knew Holdo would want the same thing. So why were they not working together?

For a moment, Rosella's mind wandered back to the First Order. She thought about Finn and Rose, wondering what might happen to them if they were caught. If Armitage caught them then she knew that they would be in trouble. She knew of his methods and she knew that the chances of them making it out alive were slim. What if he already had them?

Rosella let her mind go back to Finn. She had taught so many children just like him. She had seen them grow up to become nothing but faceless Stormtroopers. She hated herself for that. She should have done more. She should have saved them. Biting down on her lip, she knew that she could not let Finn down. He had fought against the First Order and saved her and Poe from them. She needed to keep him safe.

Reaching for the intercom in the middle of the table, Rosella pressed a button on the table to dim the glass, making sure no one could see in the room. She was well aware that he would have the same code to his intercom as he always did in all of the ships they had been on. He was a man of method and routine. He would not have changed. Making contact with him on his private intercom was easier than Rosella had managed.

The sight of him appearing as a hologram in front of her caused her to falter for a moment. He looked at her too, his eyes wide and a sense of shock in his expression. Looking at her, he nodded his head once ran a hand down his cheek.

"I had not thought to see you again," he said.

Rosella shrugged. "I had not thought to want to make contact with you," she responded and he chuckled darkly, nodding his head.

"That was what I had thought," he said to her. "What is it that you want, Rosella? I am trying to gain a couple of hours sleep before preparing for tomorrow."

Rosella knew she had to play coy with her husband but, by the sounds of his tone, he did not have Finn and Rose in his grip. If he did then he would have delighted in telling her all about it. He always did enjoy having the upper hand.

"I do not know," Rosella admitted to him.

He noticed that she was wearing some type of green pantsuit as she pulled her knees to her chest in the small chair she was sat in. Her eyes remained set on his hologram as he saw her tuck her hair behind her ears.

"Your hair has grown," he observed.

Rosella twirled a strand around her finger.

"I am surprised you noticed," he informed her.

"I notice more than you think," was all that he responded to her with.

"I honestly don't know why I thought this would be a good idea," Rosella said, wondering in her mind why she was still talking to him. He clearly had no idea about Finn and Rose. She should end this conversation and go. She should go to Poe and try to clear the air. All of those were the things that she should have done, but she didn't. Instead she remained where she was. "The last time I heard you…well…you were talking with Poe."

He seemed intrigued then. "You heard our conversation?"

"I was on the bridge," she responded to him nonchalantly. "I heard what you said about me giving myself to you."

"It was true."

"I do not deny that," Rosella held her hands up in defence. "I know full well what I did, Armitage. I know how I felt about you. You just never felt the same."

"I was told never to feel that way," Armitage told her. "Love makes you weak, Rosella. You see that now. You see how it stops you from thinking clearly."

"But it also helps to keep us sane," Rosella responded to him. "It helps us to form relationships, Armitage. It…do you mean to tell me that you felt nothing for me? I sometimes wonder if it is true. I sometimes wonder if a part of you cared…when you defended me in front of your father…or when you sat with me that night and we spoke about planets…I do not know."

"Rosella," he whispered her name in a low tone. "Do not do this."

"I know," Rosella said to him. "I know that bringing up the past will do nothing."

It was only as she moved her hand to push her hair behind her ears did he see it. It glistened on her hologram and he felt his chest pang and his cheeks turn red. Looking to her, he narrowed his eyes.

"You are wearing a ring," he informed her and Rosella looked down to the band sat on her finger, holding her hands together as she rested them in between her legs and stomach. "Rosella, do you forget one little fact?"

"That I am married to you?" Rosella said. "I do not forget, Armitage."

"Then you cannot marry the foolish pilot!"

"One day I can," Rosella said. "Marriages can be annulled and, let us be honest, there is a chance one of us might not come out of this entire fight alive."

"Not if the Supreme Leader has his way," Armitage hissed and he saw the look of confusion on her face before he spoke again. "He has ordered me to kill you should we come into contact again. I take it you have nothing to say, Rosella? That is a first. Usually you are always so happy to keep talking."

"Stop it," Rosella hissed at him.

"Why?" he demanded back at her. "You always did the talking. You were always trying to manipulate me and I think you might have got what you wanted because the thought of killing you…seeing you dead…it does not bode well with me. It does not fill me with anything but horror and fear!"

"Good!" Rosella yelled back at him. "That is how you are supposed to feel, Armitage. You aren't supposed to relish the idea of murdering someone!"

"But you are not just someone, are you?" Armitage sniped back. "You are my wife, regardless of whose ring you wear. You are still my wife. You will always be my wife."

"Perhaps you should have treated me like one," Rosella snapped back. "Maybe then we would not be where we are today. Maybe things could have been different, but they are not, are they, Armitage? And they never will be."

Before he could respond, Rosella disconnected from the intercom, slamming her hand down on the button as she gasped for breath, bowing her head. She wondered exactly what was going on in Armitage's mind as she let out a shaky breath, her hand going through her hair before she stood up and moved away, knowing that she had to speak to Holdo before she lost another man she had dared to let herself fall for.

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	33. Chapter 33

Rosella knew that Poe would do something foolish. She had half expected it. However, when she was summoned by Holdo to the hanger, she found herself angrier than she had expected to be. The evacuation from the ship was well underway and Rosella had taken hold of Katrine by the hand after waking her. She had stormed down the corridors with the little girl by her side as she came to stand in front of Holdo.

The woman was tall and lean, dressed in a long soft brown dress with her hair in pristine condition and hanging gently down her face in soft waves. She had a strong jaw and her eyes were set on Rosella as she made her way towards her. She looked down after a moment and spotted the little girl clinging to an angry Rosella. As soon as she stood before her, Rosella bowed her head.

"I trust you are Rosella?" Holdo asked.

"I am, Commander," Rosella said to her. "And I take it you want me here because Poe has done something foolish?"

Her lips quirked for a moment despite the situation. "He has started a mutiny," she declared and Rosella rolled her eyes and shook her head. "He has locked himself in the bridge and is threatening my escape plan. I need you to see if you can get the fly-boy out. He will not listen to me."

"He has not listened to me this entire time," Rosella informed her. "However, I can see what I can do."

"Glad to hear it," Holdo said and then looked down to the little girl. "And who is this?"

"Oh," she said in a soft voice. "This is Katrine. She was one of my pupils on D'Qar. I don't suppose she can wait here for me to come back so we can go together?"

"Of course," Holdo said and Rosella suspected there was something inside of her that had a motherly temperament. "Why don't you stay with me for a while? We can organise people onto these transports?"

Katrine was slightly apprehensive, but after a final squeeze of her hand from Rosella, she let go and moved to take hold of Holdo's hand. Running down the corridors, Rosella was glad she had changed into a pantsuit as she came to the bridge and saw some of the Resistance trying to break in. Rosella moved past them and banged on the door, yelling at the top of her voice.

"Poe Dameron, I know that you are in there!"

There was a brief moment before he responded to her.

"I am doing what I need to do."

"You are being reckless and disobeying orders."

"Because the orders are reckless," Poe responded through the door and Rosella felt the urge to roll her eyes as she leant against the door and continued speaking to him.

"How long do you think you can keep this up for?" she demanded from him. "They are going to break down this door eventually. Just come out and come with me to a rescue transport. We can get away from here."

"We're going to get ourselves killed if we do that," Poe responded and it was then when Rosella saw her.

Her mouth gaped at the sight of the woman in white advancing towards them, her hands holding onto a blaster as she stepped forwards with a stick for support. Everyone moved out of the way as she looked to the door and it began to shake, slowly opening by being pushed in. Rosella remained in awe as General Organa opened the door and smoke filled the corridor and the bridge as she stepped into the room and held the blaster up. Rosella heard the faint confusion from Poe before Leia fired the blaster and stunned him, knocking him backwards.

"You're alive," Rosella gasped and Leia turned to look to her as the Resistance fighters entered the room and quashed the short-lived rebellion. Rosella saw Leia turn to her, a soft smirk on her face.

"Of course I am," she answered. "And your pilot has a lot to answer for."

"Believe me, I know," Rosella grumbled. "But shouldn't you be resting?"

"Now is not the time for resting," Leia said. "I need you to go and get on a rescue transport with Poe. We will be leaving sooner than you think."

…

Rosalie had only wondered why Holdo hadn't told Poe of her plan all along. As they flew away from the Raddus, she looked back, knowing that Holdo's fate was inevitable. Rosella had perched on a section of the seat that spanned all the way around the ship, holding Katrine on her lap. Poe was on the floor, still knocked out from the blaster. Rosella had been telling Katrine a story that she had made up as they escaped. Of course, she was rudely interrupted when Poe woke up.

He scrambled to his feet and flung himself against the window, slamming on the glass and muttering no. Rosella looked on for a moment and then went back to her story, still angry with what Poe had decided to do as Leia spoke to him and told him the plan.

"She had a plan all along, Poe," Leia informed the pilot. "She was never going to risk the entire Resistance and you know that. Deep down, you know that."

Poe said nothing before pointing to the Raddus. "But she never told me," he said to Leia. "She is going to give us time to escape. She…she is sacrificing herself."

"Noble, isn't it?" Leia said with a critically arched brow at the pilot before looking to Rosella. "And I understand that Holdo is not the only one you have quarrelled with recently."

Turning to look to Rosella, Poe saw her still speaking and smiling with Katrine. Letting out a deep breath, Poe nodded and moved towards her. Bending down, he looked to Katrine first as Rosella stopped talking and looked to the side, avoiding his gaze.

"Do you think I can talk to Rose for a couple of minutes?" Poe asked and Katrine nodded, slipping from her lap and moving to Leia who had urged for her to come and talk to her.

Rosella stood up and began to move away, but Poe was quick. He moved his arm out, catching her by the waist to stop her from going as she still looked anywhere but at him. Stepping closer to her until their bodies were almost pressed together, Poe arched an inquisitive brow as he looked to her and forced her gaze to his with a hand on her cheek to turn her head.

"So you don't even want to talk to me, huh?" he asked from her and she rolled her eyes.

"I am still angry with you," she warned him and Poe arched his brow. "You…you didn't want to talk to me earlier because you thought that you knew better, but you didn't, did you? There was a plan all along, but you couldn't even trust someone to do the right thing because you think you know better."

"I made a mistake, alright?" Poe said to her. "I hold my hands up."

"But you only hold your hands up when it is too late," Rosella said. "You…you need to stop acting like this. You need to stop thinking that you know best all the time. It was the same with Deadnought."

"I've messed up, Rose, and I know that."

"Yeah, you know it now, but what hurts the most is that you wouldn't even listen to me," Rosella said to him. "You ignored Holdo…Leia…but you also ignored me and that hurts the most. You didn't even listen to me. You just went off and did your own thing. I'm supposed to be your equal, Poe. I thought that we had a relationship where we tried to reason with each other, but you didn't do that."

"I'm sorry, Rose," Poe said and she shrugged.

"I know," she said, "but I'm still angry with you."

And with that she slipped from his grip and Poe watched her walk back to Leia and Katrine, taking a seat. It was then when Rosella saw the blast of green fly by their ship. Looking to the side, she saw that the Supremacy had caught them. The First Order was onto them and they were firing at the small escape ships. Rosella heard shrieks echo through the ship as she grabbed Katrine and sunk to the ground, holding onto the frightened little girl as Leia moved to her feet.

"They've hit three of them," Poe called out as he saw Rosella on the floor with Katrine and he moved to kneel besides her.

He grabbed hold of her by the waist, forgetting everything they had just discussed as he took hold of her and she kept hold of Katrine, the two of them looking out the window as the First Order continued to fire on them.

"Poe…they're firing at us…" Rosella stated the obvious and Poe looked to her before bending down and kissing her hastily, not caring who was watching as he pulled back and placed his forehead against hers as another ship blew up in the distance.

"I love you," Poe said to her, "and I am sorry…but everything I have done…everything…is to keep us safe…to keep the Resistance safe…to give us a future."

Rosella took a deep breath and nodded her head. "I do love you," she whispered to him. "I always will."

As they continued looking out of the window, they noted the Raddus beginning to turn. Furrowing a brow, Rosella wondered what was happening as Poe kept his grip around her and he saw Katrine bury her face against Rosella's shoulder, closing her eyes and crying softly as she feared the worst.

"What is she doing?"

"Saving us," Poe said before the ship jumped to hyperdrive and collided with the Supremacy. Moving to her feet, Rosella grabbed hold of Katrine and held her against her front as Poe stood up, arm still around her waist as they watched the sight in front of them.

The Raddus was destroyed as the Supremacy cut into two, completely destroyed. Rosella's mouth gaped as she felt Poe's grip around her tighten. Looking to him, he saw her eyes widen and tears threaten to spill.

"Finn," she whispered his name and Poe shook his head. "Was Finn on that ship."

"Rose," Poe whispered her name, knowing full well that Finn had been on the ship. He had managed to sneak on board the last time Poe had heard from him. "He might have gotten off."

"No," Rosella said with a shake of her head as Poe bent down to kiss her forehead. But as she thought of Finn, her mind wandered to Armitage. Was he on there? Had he survived?

…

Armitage was in disarray. One moment he had been interrogating the two rebels and the next his ship had been destroyed. He had been knocked to the floor when he had realised that he needed the Supreme Leader. Yet the Supreme Leader had died and Ren had been by his body. He had claimed that the girl had been the one to deliver the fatal blow, but Armitage had doubted it. Ren had claimed his position as the new Commander of the First Order, but Armitage hated that. He didn't know what he could do to make it not so, but he had no other option but to accept it. As Ren released him from his grip, Armitage fell to the floor.

"All hail the Supreme Leader," he spoke to Ren.

Ren sneered once and looked down to him. "I sense the conflict inside of you, General," he snarled. "You stand here and you think of her. You wonder whether she survived."

Armitage remained on the ground, looking to Ren.

"We will finish this," Ren said. "And you will finish her, or I will find myself searching for a new General."

"Who do you think you are?" Armitage demanded from him.

Ren arched a brow. "You just answered that," he declared. "And you will do well to remember it."

"If I see Rosella then I will not do what you ask," Armitage declared. "She is my wife. I will claim her as mine."

"Your wife is a traitor," Ren snapped. "She will be treated as such. You would react anyone else the same. Do not see her as any different."

Armitage said nothing further, his gaze wondering to space as he wondered if she had been on one of the ships to be destroyed. A part of him wondered if she had been and how selfish he felt. If she had been then it meant that his hands stayed clean of her blood.

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	34. Chapter 34

_Six Years Ago_

 _Looking to his wife, Armitage saw her beaming widely as she moved around their living quarters. There were times when he considered exactly what he was doing and whether or not it was worth it. A part of him wanted simply to be with his wife. Part of him just wanted to spend time with her, especially when he saw her like this. She was carefree. She had nothing to worry about. Her only issue was keeping herself busy and entertained while her husband worked on plans to build up the First Order._

 _Seeing her move around the living space, she was light footed as she cleaned up. She had been preparing dinner, which was currently cooking and waiting for them to eat when Armitage returned. She stood still as soon as she saw him, her hands holding onto his folders filled with plans that she had moved from the chairs he had dumped them in when he had finished working late at night._

" _Oh, Armitage," she said, clearly startled by his presence._

" _I will put those in my office," Armitage said, holding his hands out to take the folders. "I should not have left them lying around."_

" _It's fine," Rosella told him. "I just thought that I could tidy things before you came back. How was your day?"_

 _He took the folders from her and offered a shrug of his shoulders. "I suspect we will get there eventually, but we have a lot of work to do for the time being."_

" _And do you need to work this evening?" his wife enquired of him._

" _Perhaps," he said to her. "Although I shall attempt to come to bed earlier this evening. Did I wake you last night?"_

" _I wasn't really sleeping," Rosella shrugged as he moved into his office and reappeared a moment later to find her standing in the small kitchen area, pulling the food out of the heat and setting the tray down in the middle._

" _I apologise," Armitage said, hands behind his back. "I will try to be more considerate in the future."_

" _It's fine," Rosella said to him, cutting into the dish and plating up, hoping that he was happy with grassroot stew. She finished dishing the two plates up and moved to the dining table. Both of them sat down, Armitage taking the head of the table while his wife sat to his right._

" _Although, perhaps you might need a short break," Rosella said, toying with her fork in her fingertips as Armitage took a sip of water and looked to her with an inquisitive stare. "It would not hurt, Armitage. If you take a morning off then it will allow you to sleep. I know you are busy, but how can you function on so little sleep? How can you be expected to do your job properly?"_

 _He forced himself to shrug at hearing her; unsure of how he should answer her question. She remained mute as she picked up a mouthful of food and chewed down on it. For once Armitage hadn't snapped at her when she suggested he take a short break. She managed a small smile just for him and he sighed, nodding his head._

" _I will be at work before lunch," he declared. "If I do not wake then please wake me."_

" _Of course," Rosella said._

 _The two of them went back to eating their meal in silence. Rosella tided things away while Armitage sat on the leather sofa and looked over papers. He said nothing before noticing his wife settling down next to him, holding a book in her fingertips. Armitage looked off to the side, catching the cover of what she was reading. She was reading into the history of the Empire._

" _I did not know those things interested you," Armitage commented, well aware of the space between the two of them._

" _I like history," was all that she offered to him. "I have read both sides. The Republic v the Empire."_

" _Is that so?"_

" _History is always two sided," Rosella said, looking to him. "There are always two sides to every story when it comes to differing viewpoints."_

" _And which one do you believe?" Armitage asked her._

 _She closed the book and rested it on her lap, her legs burrowed beneath her as she looked to her husband. "That's the thing," she said to him. "You do not need to pick a side. You can look at both of them and see how they differ and why they might differ before trying to come to an objective viewpoint."_

" _Do you think so?"_

" _I think it is better to think that way," Rosella responded with a shrug of her shoulder. "I think that makes more sense. Not everything is black and white."_

 _Reaching out, Armitage moved a hand to her cheek, stroking her hair back from her face and tucking it behind her ear. "You really are intelligent."_

" _Not really," Rosella responded with a shrug of her shoulders. "I just like to read and learn. Perhaps one day it might come in useful for something."_

" _Why not talk to me?" Armitage asked from her._

 _Rosella shook her head. "I do not wish to bore you," she said to him. "You are busy enough as it is, Armitage. You do not need me here distracting you."_

" _It is research," Armitage responded. "Perhaps you can tell me what you have read and I can make sure we do not follow in the same mistakes as the Empire?"_

 _Rosella was almost appalled at the notion, but she said nothing on the matter. She didn't want to help the First Order, but she doubted what she spoke of with Armitage would help them. A part of her wondered if her husband simply wanted conversation with her but he didn't know how to ask. He didn't know how to engage in normal conversation._

" _If you want me to," Rosella said._

" _I would like that," he confirmed to her and she nodded._

 _She felt his arm tentatively wrap around her waist, holding her loosely as she let her arm rest against his side. Opening up her book, she began reading as Armitage confessed that he was more interested in the feeling of her being so close to him than the words she spoke._

Now

Rosella held onto Katrine as they sat in the base on Crait. Nothing was working and the remaining engineers were doing everything in their power to get the base up and running. Poe had gone to examine the ships that they had there while Rosella felt useless. Closing her eyes as she sat in the chair, she held onto Katrine, her arms wrapped tightly around her. She thought back to everyone had perished. All of the children she had once taught had gone. They had been snatched away and Katrine was the only one left. Letting out a deep breath at the thought, she opened her eyes and looked down to the young girl who had her arms wrapped around Rosella.

She knew exactly what was going on. She was young, but she knew. Rosella had done her best to stand by the young girl, knowing that she was the only one she had left now. She had started to look up to her like a mother and the thought scared Rosella. She was scared of being the one to look after a child permanently, but the thought of Katrine being alone scared her even more.

"The ships are rust buckets," Poe complained as soon as he returned to Rosella in the corner of the room.

She opened her eyes and looked up to him as he pulled his hands through his hair.

"How long before they come?" Rosella wondered, knowing full well that the First Order would come.

"A day," Poe muttered. "The General is sending out a distress call to the rest of our forces."

"Do you think they will answer?" Rosella asked, well aware that hope was slowly fading within the Resistance. She could feel it weakening ever day that passed them by. Of course, she knew that she would rather die than bow to the First Order, but that didn't mean that the thought didn't scare her.

"Who knows?" Poe whispered and took the chair next to her, his hands going onto his thighs as he looked to Katrine who was eyeing him with intrigue, but her eyes were hooded and he saw a tiredness there. "Someone looks like they need some sleep."

"I'm fine," she said with a loud yawn.

Poe chuckled and moved a hand out to ruffle her hair as she watched him. "You know, I heard Leia say that there are some treats in the back if you're hungry?"

She seemed to perk up then and Poe smirked, moving to his feet and offering his hand to the young girl. He helped her down from Rosella's lap and offered her his hand. She took hold of it as Poe looked to Rosella and managed a genuine smile before diverting his attention back down to the small girl. Rosella watched him walk off, his hand holding onto Katrine's as the little girl looked up at him and spoke animatedly. Rosella's lips quirked as she began to wonder exactly what Poe might be like as a father.

Rosella stood on her feet then and wandered through the base before noticing Leia sat on her own. She looked as though she needed a few moments before she saw Rosella wandering by. Waving her over, the young woman perched on the box across from Leia, her arms crossed and dangling over her lap.

"Is everything alright, General?" Rosella wondered.

Leia's lips quirked. "Our forces have been made near obsolete and we wait for the First Order."

Rosella frowned. "Silly question," she responded.

"No," Leia said with a shake of her head. "It's just difficult to feel the light when we're surrounded by so much darkness. Your husband…" Leia trailed off, stopping what she was saying as she reconsidered her words. "General Hux has sent word that they know where we are. They will be here by tomorrow evening."

"And has our distress call been answered?"

"Not yet," Leia said with a shake of her head. "Our escape pods are all damaged too. There is no running."

"What is it we need to do?" Rosella enquired and Leia shrugged.

"I do not think that there is anything we can do," she admitted. "However, I have seen that Katrine has grown very fond of you. She adores you. I think that when the time comes tomorrow…when they are here…I think that you should hide her. I think you should try to find a way out of here if possible."

"I…I want to protect her," Rosella nodded in confirmation. "But I cannot run away. I cannot run away and leave Poe."

"He will tell you to do exactly the same thing," Leia said. "But that girl is the next generation, Rosella. I know what you were with the First Order. I know how you taught children that you wanted to save. You have one here who you need to try to save. She deserves that."

"And can we run?" Rosella enquired from her. "Is there a way out of here?"

Leia said nothing. "There will be distractions going on should it come to a battle. That should make enough of an escape."

"And how would I even get off this planet? All the pods are destroyed."

"There are small escape pods in them…they fit one person in each of them. We had about six ships that landed here which means there are six pods. The ships crash-landed about a mile from here. When the time comes, go back to them."

"And if we cannot?" Rosella wondered. "General, I know you mean well, but maybe someone else should go with her."

"It needs to be you," Leia said and leant forwards. "She trusts you and adores you. And…if the First Order catch us then I worry for you too. They would have no hesitation killing all of us, but I worry what they might do to you. I worry about you returning to your husband."

"He would kill me," Rosella said so nonchalantly. "He has orders to kill me should he find me."

Leia arched a brow. "Don't tell me how you know that."

Rosella bit down on her lip. Peering over to Leia, she managed to inhale a sharp breath. "You understand how it feels? To have loved someone and them betray you?"

"All too well," Leia confirmed.

"He wasn't always like this," Rosella said in a hushed voice, wondering if Poe would be coming back soon. "And I don't know how I can let him go. I don't know how I can forget about him because I want to. I want to forget about him and be with Poe. I love Poe. I will always love Poe, despite the fact he can be a complete idiot. But…he's Poe…but Armitage…can you turn off your feelings for someone? Can you forget that they exist?"

"Of course not," Leia said with a shake of her head. "But you can move on and stop dwelling in the past. Poe could be your future, Rosella. You deserve to move on to him and that will bring you peace."

"You wouldn't believe what she put away in that stomach!"

Poe's booming voice entered their ears and Rosella moved to her feet to see Poe swinging Katrine's arm in the air as he held onto her hand and she rolled her eyes and laughed. Rosella smiled brightly as Katrine looked up to Poe.

"I didn't eat that much."

"She ate enough for ten people," Poe said, leaning back slightly.

"I did not," Katrine said.

"Did too," Poe said.

"Did not," she responded.

"You calling me a liar, kid?" Poe asked and Katrine began to laugh loudly as he bent down and began tickling her on the sides, taunting her as Rosella laughed at the sight and he finally relented, feeling Katrine lean against his side as he wrapped his arms around her and hauled her from the ground as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Is he exaggerating again?" Rosella asked, her hand brushing Katrine's cheek.

"Yes," Katrine said.

"Me? Exaggerating? I have never heard something so preposterous," Poe spat out and Katrine laughed at his tone as Rosella moved a free hand to Poe's arm, looking him in the eye as he glanced back to her, still smiling as he held Katrine in his arms.

"Can it be like this for a while?" Rosella asked, both of them knowing what was coming.

Poe nodded. "Yeah…yeah, I'd like that."

Rosella smiled and rested her cheek on Poe's shoulder, closing her eyes for a moment as Leia watched on, knowing full well what lay ahead for them tomorrow. She only hoped they could somehow get out of their fate which, at that moment in time, seemed completely sealed.

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	35. Chapter 35

Rosella said nothing as the night progressed. Poe had sat by her side, holding onto her as Katrine slept on the small camp bed in the corner. They knew that when the morning came then the First Order would be there. Poe had let Katrine fall asleep before taking hold of Rosella by the hand, urging her to her feet. She furrowed her brow as she let him drag her off further into the base.

"I need to show you these fighter ships," Poe said. "Just because they are too bad not to be seen."

"This isn't filling me with confidence, Poe," Rosella said as they came to the ships and she looked up to them, shaking her head back and forth as Poe climbed up on one, the steps by the side of it.

Rosella followed him, climbing slower as she saw Poe climb onto the wing and she remained on the top step. Poe looked down to it and crouched down, knocking on the glass of the windshield. A part of it broke away and Rosella placed her hand over her mouth to stifle a loud and dry laugh. Poe held the glass and shook his head, tossing it over his shoulder.

"And you are certain that you should be using these?" she asked from him.

"No," Poe said, "but I don't think we have any other option."

"This is madness," Rosella said in a small voice.

"I never thought this would happen," Poe admitted, sitting on the edge of the wing as Rosella perched on the final step of the ladder, lifting her hand up to take hold of his as Poe laced their fingers together. "I always thought that the Resistance would win. I never thought that the likes of the First Order could beat us."

"And now?" Rosella wondered, looking up to him as he shrugged.

"I still have hope," he said, "but it is wavering."

Rosella nodded, biting down on her bottom lip. "I think everybody pretty much feels the same right now."

"Really?" Poe asked from her.

"Yes," Rosella said. "We are outnumbered. No one has answered the call for help. The First Order will be here in a few hours. I just don't know how much more we can take, Poe."

Poe nodded. "I know," he whispered to her and kissed the back of her hand. "I know."

…

Rosella had told Katrine to stay back while she stood with Poe, the two of them behind the General as she looked out over Crait. The door to the base was slightly open as some of the Resistance fighters had gone to hide in the trenches outside the base. Rosella had narrowed her eyes after a few moments, spotting something in the distance before she recognised the familiar sound of the TIE fighter. She grabbed hold of Poe's elbow and he nodded.

"Everyone get a blaster!" he demanded as the TIE fighters grew closer, but they were following another ship. Rosella frowned. She couldn't help but think it looked similar to the ship Kylo Ren used.

It was heading straight towards the base as Poe yelled for the doors to close. Running backwards, Rosella took hold of Katrine, standing back as some of the members of the Resistance fired at the incoming ship as it hurtled towards them. Somehow, it managed to get underneath the closing door as Rosella picked Katrine up. The door closed, but the ship was already inside, everyone firing on it and moving around it.

But then voices entered their ears, begging for them to hold their fire. Poe held a hand up, indicating that they should hold their fire. They did so and it was then when two people poked their heads from the top of the ship. Rosella smiled widely as she spotted Finn alongside a woman who, she suspected, was Rose.

Rosella laughed as Poe fell to his knees at the sight of BB-8 moving towards them and she carried Katrine towards him. She let the little girl slide down her side onto the floor, keeping hold of her hand as she knelt down by Poe's side and he continued fussing BB-8.

"Oh, buddy, I am so glad to see you," Poe said, beaming widely as Rosella laughed softly and BB looked to her as she moved to run a hand down his side and he whirled to her.

"Oh, don't worry," Rosella said, "I've been keeping an eye on him."

BB-8 whirled again and tilted to the side, clearly intrigued. "Oh," Rosella said. "This is Katrine. She is a friend of ours. Katrine, this is BB-8; Poe's droid."

The robot whirled as Katrine laughed and looked to the droid who held out an extended hand, offering to shake her hand. She took hold of it as Poe smirked and looked to Rosella as she ran a hand down Katrine's back and stood up. Finn was making their way to them and Rosella flung her arms around him, holding onto him.

"I am so glad you're alive," she said in a hushed voice into his ear and he pulled back, nodding.

"Same," he said as Poe moved to embrace him.

"Listen, I need to get the equipment up and running. The First Order will be here soon. Finn, can I trust on you to fly out with me?"

"You can rely on me," Finn said and Poe slapped him on the back before moving away. It was then when Finn moved a hand to Rosella's shoulder, causing her to turn to look at him.

"I need a word," he whispered.

He motioned with his head for her to follow him, which she did so. She made sure Katrine was fine with BB-8 before following Finn to where the ship had just crashed. He stood tall, hands behind his back as he let out a sharp breath and nodded his head.

"General Hux was the one who was going to execute Rose and I," Finn said to her. "He caught us and he…he said some things, Rosella, about you. I don't know if it was some type of warning he wanted me to pass on, but he wanted me to know that if he ever saw you then he would be forced to kill you."

"I already knew that," Rosella said in a small voice.

"No, there was something more," Finn said with a shake of his head. "I know Hux. I served under him and Phasma. He isn't a kind man, but he…he put this into my pocket before hitting me."

"Why?" Rosella wondered as Finn pulled out a piece of paper. "If he was going to execute you then why did he give you this?"

Finn handed her the paper and she looked to it, noticing how it was neatly folded. Unfolding it, she peered down and almost felt a thud in her chest at the sight of it. She placed a hand over her mouth as Finn saw her look away. He moved slowly to peer down to the paper.

"A letter," Finn said.

"I need a minute," Rosella said in a whisper, turning away, but Finn took hold of her by the shoulder to stop her.

"What is it? Why did he give this to me?"

"Because he…I don't know," Rosella said with a shake of her head, walking further into the base and looking to the paper, remembering exactly when she had seen him write it.

 _Six Years Ago_

 _Armitage walked outside to see Rosella sat amongst the grass. She had her legs folded and wore a blue pantsuit. Her hair was tied into a high ponytail and Armitage didn't remember seeing her hair that long before. He walked out onto the grass and saw her writing on a pad of paper. He furrowed his brows and settled down on the grass next to her, his hand moving to her back and resting there as she turned to look to him, offering him a smile and a peck on the cheek._

" _What are you writing?" Armitage wondered from her._

" _Nothing entirely special," she informed him. "I just like to write down memories from time to time…the good ones…"_

" _And what one is this?" Armitage enquired from her._

" _From the other night," Rosella responded, putting the paper down and daring to wrap an arm around her husband's waist as she leant against his side and Armitage almost felt welcoming as he moved a hand to her cheek, stroking slowly along it._

" _When we were reading together," Rosella said, "and just what I felt."_

" _And what did you feel?"_

" _I felt as though we were…for once…a married couple," Rosella admitted to him. "I know that we are married, but I never really knew what that should feel like. I never knew what I should feel and I don't know if you felt the same."_

" _I…I do," Armitage said to her. "I know that my father always suspected that I was weak and I think that he was wrong. Being with you does not make me weak…being with you makes me feel stronger. Knowing that I have you is enough to make me feel as though I can conquer anything."_

" _I know that your father hates me," Rosella said._

" _He hates everyone," Armitage informed her. "I would try not to take it too personally, Rosella."_

" _I do not," she said, "but I just want you to know that he is wrong about you."_

" _Thank you," Rosella said._

" _And that diary entry," Armitage said. "May I keep it? Because…you're not the only one who feels lost, Rosella. Sometimes I don't know what you're thinking and sometimes I don't know how to ask. I am not the best with conversation. I think we both know that."_

" _You want to know what I think?" she asked._

" _I always want to know what you think," Armitage said in a whisper. "You are my wife."_

 _Rosella nodded. "Okay," she said and moved to her knees and turned to face him as Armitage looked to her with an arched brow. "But you have to write something to tell me what you're thinking. I think it should work both ways. I…you're right, Armitage…we're not the best at talking about things. Maybe this will be a way to work for both of us?"_

 _Armitage seemed to consider what she was saying for a moment before he nodded his head and leaned towards her, his hand going to her cheek and brushing back some stray strands of hair that had fallen from the ponytail. He leaned in and Rosella's breath faltered as she felt his lips press against hers. Pulling back, he looked at her after a moment._

" _All you need to know is that I think you are stunning," he whispered to her and she smiled at hearing him, wondering exactly what she was thinking as she moved to kiss him again, her hand wrapping around the back of his neck as she struggled to think about anything else but her husband._

Now

Rosella continued to look to the letter, wondering why he had kept hold of it. He had written the letter to her, telling her exactly what he felt about her six years ago. Was he trying to torture her? Is this what he wanted? She sad nothing as she pocketed the letter into her jumpsuit and turned in time to see Poe making his way towards her. She forced a smile onto her face as Poe stood before her.

"Come on," Poe said to her. "I need you to go with Katrine and stay out of the way."

"Is it time?" she wondered and Poe nodded, taking her hand and dragging her towards the control centre.

"Yeah," Poe said with a nod of his head. "Listen to me, Rose, I know what Leia told you-"

"-I am not running," she interrupted him.

"No," Poe said with a shake of his head. "You might not want to, but I think you might have to if this goes wrong. I'm not going to see you go back to him and have him hurt you. Katrine needs to be protected. She is a child and she loves you just as you love her. She is innocent in all of this and she needs protecting."

"But I need you," Rosella said.

Poe took hold of the ring she wore around her neck, holding it between them. "And you will always have me," Poe said in a whisper, "but we both know I am not invincible, Rose. Just…please…if it comes to it then just go. Take Katrine and go."

Poe took hold of her by the cheeks as everyone geared up and he knew he had to go. Before she could argue with him anymore, his lips pressed on hers and he kissed her hastily, pouring every emotion in the kiss as she grabbed hold of him too. He pulled back after a few seconds and looked her in the eye.

"I love you," he whispered.

"I love you too, Poe Dameron," she responded and kissed him once more before releasing him and seeing him move to his own ship. Closing her eyes for a second, she held his ring in her fingertips, longing for him to be kept safe during the battle.

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	36. Chapter 36

Rosella held tightly onto Katrine as she stood by Leia's side. She knew what Poe wanted her to do. She knew what Leia wanted her to do. Yet, Rosella didn't know if she could do it. She didn't know what more she could do, but holding the little girl in her arms, she closed her eyes as she heard Leia sigh. Deep down, Rosella knew that they had no chance of survival. They had no chance to win this fight. It scared her more than she cared to admit. The door was still slightly open and roars from the trenches echoed around them. In the distance the AT M6 Walkers was in the distance. The ski speeders were rusty as they made their way towards the First Order and the ground forces that threatened to attack.

"Go, Rosella," Leia whispered.

"No, there is still hope," Rosella said, feeling the ring she wore of Poe's grow heavier with each passing thought she had of running. "They have only just set off."

"No one is answering our distress signal," Leia said to her in a whisper, looking up to her as Katrine wrapped her arms around Rosella's neck. Clinging tightly onto her, Rosella did her best not to feel a lump in her throat. "We are outnumbered. The battle rages on and now is your time to escape. Go and get to safety. Should we win then we will follow you."

"General-"

"-It is an order, Rosella," Leia interrupted her sternly, looking to her as Rosella bit down on her lip and looked to Leia, tears brimming in her eyes. "That child needs saving. She is a child…I couldn't save my son…but I can save her…you can save her…Poe will understand."

"And that is the maddening part," Rosella whispered.

"I wouldn't send you away if I thought there was a certain chance of safety, but I cannot guarantee that."

Nodding her head, Rosella took a deep breath and reached for a blaster. She moved with haste then, dropping Katrine so that she was down by her side as she looked to the door that was still slightly ajar. But then Rosella saw it. She had seen the designs for it in Armitage's study one day.

"Leia…they have a Superlaser siege cannon. You need to shut this door," she demanded from her. It's…the technology on that thing is like the Death Star. It will cut through the door in minutes."

"Go," Leia said to her. "Go and then we will-"

"-No," Rosella said quickly. "You don't understand. Those doors need to be shut now!"

"Get through them and run…turn left and run, Rosella," Leia said.

Rosella didn't know what possessed her, but she took hold of Katrine's hand and dragged her through the large metal doors before the canon could warm up. Turning left, she ran along the cliff wall of the mine as she heard the familiar noise of TIE fighters above her alongside the noise of the ski speeders. Running with the little girl in tow, Rosella suspected it would take her ten or more minutes to get to the escape pods. She ran with haste, her feet hitting the ground, yet Katrine lagged behind her.

Reaching behind her body, Rosella took hold of the little girl into her arms and ran with haste, knowing full well that the mine would be swarming with stormtroopers if nothing happened. Rosella didn't know if she could do it. She didn't know if she could run away. Poe would be forced to retreat. He would be trapped. He would be left in there.

Her pace slowed as she carried the little girl, turning her head over her shoulder to see the canon blasting towards the shut door. She said nothing as she saw the speeders retreat, knowing that they had no chance. She went still before she saw the canon blast through the door. Her body shook wildly as she saw the escape pods, grateful that they were closer than they had estimated.

Standing by them, she turned her head around again and saw Kylo Ren's ship land in front of the mine. But then she saw another figure leave as Kylo Ren stepped forwards, his lightsaber igniting as another figure stepped out from the mine. She wondered who it could be, but she didn't get that far in looking. Instead she saw Kylo Ren's ship begin to hover and move off. The only problem was that it was floating in her direction.

"We need to go, Katrine," Rosella said with haste, stepping into one of the ships and looking for the escape pod. She found it after a moment, her fingers playing on the control panel. She pressed all the buttons she needed to, but nothing seemed to be happening. She cried out in anger before she heard footsteps approaching. Pushing Katrine behind her body, she looked to the doorway, her breaths coming out in short and laboured pants.

She struggled to think coherently before she saw him. He came into her view, clad in his usual black uniform, his hair slicked back and his face paler than usual. Katrine gripped hold of Rosalie's arm, clinging tightly onto her as she peered around to the man stood in the doorway. Rosella looked around, but no one else came. He was alone.

"I sent them back to the fleet," his voice said and he sounded as stern as he usually did.

"Why?" Rosella asked from him.

"Because I did," was all that he offered her as she looked him in the eye and he tugged his gloves from his fingers, dropping them into his pocket as he watched his wife and the little girl. "I would have noticed you anywhere, Rosella. You should consider yourself lucky that Kylo Ren is too concerned with Luke Skywalker to notice you."

"Is it not Snoke I should be concerned of?"

"Ren killed Snoke," Armitage informed her. "He is our new Supreme Leader."

"What?"

"Yes," Armitage said and she suspected that he did not like that thought. She said nothing further, choosing to keep quiet as he moved further into the ship and looked around, his brow furrowing and crease line forming on his forehead as he then moved his gaze back to his wife. "What are you doing, Rosella? I assume you were trying to escape? What would the pilot say?"

"Poe told me to go," Rosella said in confident voice. "She is an innocent child, Armitage. She doesn't deserve this…no one in that mine deserves this."

"Yet they are rebel scum," Armitage hissed, but Rosella shook her head.

"They are just people," she said. "They just want peace."

"Then they should accept the First Order."

"Peace, not a dictatorship," Rosella counteracted. "Why are you here, Armitage? You know what you need to do so why not simply do it? We both know that is why you are here."

Armitage did look intrigued then as he took a step closer to his wife. She didn't flinch, nor did she move away. She stood her ground and watched her husband, her hands still holding onto Katrine behind her.

"You do not know why I am here, Rosella," Armitage said in a whisper. "You never really did understand me."

"Because you never let me in," Rosella said to him. "You never opened up to me."

"Is that what you are supposed to do when you are in love?" he enquired from her and she rolled her eyes at hearing him. Shaking her head back and forth, she continued to listen to him. "I let you in, Rosella. I told you things I never told anyone else. I thought that I could trust you…I thought that you wanted me…and then you left."

"You made me do things I never wanted to do!"

"Did you ever think that I maybe didn't have a choice?" he retorted, his voice harsh and demanding, taking her off guard as she looked to him with wide eyes, her breathing slightly heavier as she watched him chuckle darkly. "You didn't, did you? Snoke was the one in charge, Rosella. He didn't think that you did anything worthy for the First Order. I found the best job for you…a job that didn't have you come face to face with death…with things that you would have been traumatised to do. I protected you."

Rosella said nothing in response and Armitage let out a hollow laugh.

"Of course you didn't know."

"You never told me," Rosella said. "You never told me any of that."

"What good would it have done?" Armitage wondered from her. "You would have resented me anyway."

"No…maybe I wouldn't have…" she trailed off and he shrugged at hearing her.

"I doubt it," he responded to her.

"Armitage, just…"

"What?" he wondered and she shook her head at him.

Biting down on her bottom lip, she didn't exactly know what to say to him and so she chose to remain silent. She inhaled a sharp breath and let it out, closing her eyes for a moment before daring to look to him, knowing that she had to save Katrine despite everything. She couldn't let him hurt the little girl.

"I know that you have orders from Snoke-"

"-He is dead, but Ren wants me to enforce those orders still," Armitage said.

"Then do it," Rosella said, "but let Katrine go. Please. She has lost everyone, Armitage."

"No…please…" Katrine said quickly, pulling on Rosella's arm as she shivered and turned to look back to the little girl, bending down and pulling her into her arms as she crouched in front of her. "Don't leave me, please, Rosella. I need you."

"It's alright," Rosella promised her. "You can be safe, Katrine. You can go somewhere safe and someone will look after you."

"Go."

Rosella was unsure of what he had said as she turned her head over her shoulder to look to him. Armitage didn't look at her. Instead he remained silent and considered what he had just told her to do. But he took a deep breath and nodded his head, looking her in the eye.

"Go," he urged from her.

"But they know that you are here," Rosella said in a whisper. "If they find out I was here then what will they do?"

"Nothing," Hux said with a shake of his head. "No one saw you here. I said I would come and make sure they were empty. I sent the ship back."

"That seems reckless of you."

Hux smirked. "No one questions a General," he responded to her. "Just go, Rosella. Take her and leave this planet."

"But why?" she asked from her husband as she stepped towards him and Katrine remained weary. Hux reached out, his pale fingers running down her cheek as he looked her in the eye and let out a shaky breath, wondering when the last time he had touched her and she hadn't flinched was. It had been a long time. Instead he stepped towards her, his chest inches from hers.

"Because I remember what it was like, Rosella," he whispered to her. "And I do not have it in me to kill you…anyone else…but not you…"

"Thank you," Rosella said to him, her hand moving to his chest.

But Hux had other ideas. Moving with haste, he pulled her to him, kissing her chastely for a moment. She was too in shock to move away from him, instead she kept her eyes wide and her lips pursed. He held onto her for a moment before pulling back and looking her in the eye. He didn't know what had possessed him, but he suspected it was his wife and being so close to her without her looking at him as though she detested him.

Rosella was confused. Her emotions were scattered along with her thoughts as she looked to Armitage and wondered what they could have been. She moved a hand to sweep through his hair.

"Be careful, Armitage," she whispered to him.

"Go, Rose," he urged from her. "Just go."

He turned on his heel and swept away, leaving Rosella in the escape pod with Katrine, a strange feeling in her stomach as she saw Armitage duck out of the ship. She only wondered if that would be the last time she would see him.

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	37. Chapter 37

Relief flooded through Rosella as soon as she realised where she was. Somehow their escape pod had been picked up by the Millennium Falcon which Rey was piloting alongside Chewbacca. Everyone had made it onto the ship from Crait and then Poe had spotted the escape pod hurtling into the air and he asked if Rey could grab it. As soon as it was in the storage, Poe had rushed down to find Rosella and Katrine stored in the pod.

The little girl had smiled widely once she had seen Poe, flinging her arms around him as he looked slightly shocked at the movement. He kept quiet as he stood up and Rosella moved from the pod to her feet. He winked to her as she saw him lower Katrine to the floor.

"You didn't think I'd leave you, did you?" Poe teased her, ruffling her hair before he saw something flicker over Rosella's face. She had her arms folded over her chest as she looked down to Katrine and the little girl continued to smile at Poe as he mussed up her hair. It was then when Poe moved a hand to her shoulder. "Why don't you go and find Leia? She'll be really happy to see that you're back."

"Alright," Katrine said with a nod of her head and skipped off, glad to be back amongst the Resistance.

Poe moved forwards, a hand going to Rosella's waist as he leaned in to kiss her. But then she did something she hadn't done in a very long time. She turned her head to the side so he simply got her cheek. Poe's brows furrowed as he let his lips linger there for a moment. He pulled back after a second to see that she was still looking in the other direction. His hand remained on her waist as his brows knitted together.

"What is it?" he asked from her.

"Nothing," she said with a shake of her head, looking to him.

"I know that there is something so stop lying to me," Poe urged from her and she shrugged.

"I'm fine," was all that she said to him, a sense of guilt flowing through her as she looked to Poe and saw nothing but kindness in his eyes. He had no idea what had just happened. He had no idea and yet she was acting like a brat, yet he was being nothing but kind and urging her to talk to him. "Honestly, I'm fine."

"Okay," Poe said, not entirely convinced. "I'm just glad I found you before we left."

"How did you escape?" Rosella wondered from him, perching on a bench as Poe sat besides her. "I saw the canon, Poe. How could you possibly have escaped them?"

"Luke Skywalker," Poe said. "He distracted Kylo Ren long enough for us to find a way out. It was covered in boulders, but Rey and Cheewie turned up and she used the Force to get us out. What you see on the Falcon is what is left of the Resistance from Crait."

"That's hardly anyone," Rosella said and Poe nodded.

"I know," he told her, "but this is hope, Rose. We're the last ones left and we need to have hope."

Rosella nodded in agreement with him before bowing her head. Poe knew that something was wrong. He could tell. She was silent. She was distant. She was almost like the Rosella he had known when she had first arrived on D'Qar. What had happened during the space between him flying to battle and her escaping? What had changed? But Poe suspected he knew. He had seen her act like this before. It was always because of one person.

"Is it him?" Poe wondered, hands resting on his thighs as he sensed her turn to look at him, but he avoided her gaze as he looked forwards. "What has he done?"

"Nothing," Rosella said with a shake of her head. "Why do you assume it is him?"

"Because you act like this whenever he is on your mind," Poe said to her. "You go quiet and shut off. You…he does that to you…almost as though you can't stop thinking about him…stop loving him."

She kept silent and Poe nodded his head. He knew that something had happened even if she wasn't going to tell him.

"I stopped loving him as a wife should love a husband years ago," Rosella said, finally breaking her silence. "He…he changed and I stopped loving him. He became the man who hurt me…locked me in a cell…tried to install discipline into me…that was when I stopped loving him."

"So what has changed?" Poe shrugged at her.

"He let me escape," Rosella whispered to Poe, her voice almost breaking as she spoke in a hushed tone. "He let me and Katrine escape. He told us to go, Poe."

"One good deed does not make up for years of pain," Poe said with a shake of his head. "Listen to me, Rose, he probably feels guilty for everything he has done. I have no doubt that he is just a man and he has feelings, no matter how twisted those feelings are."

"I guess," Rosella said with a shrug of her shoulders. "It's just…I don't know. I don't want to talk about it."

"About what?"

"About the past," Rosella said. "I don't want to rehash the relationship that I had with Armitage. It was in the past and he made his choice. He decided to do what he did. He might not have had a choice. He might have had no other option but to make me teach and join the First Order, but he chose to act as he did when we were in private. He chose to act like that and I…I tried, but it wasn't enough."

"And that is why he is a fool," Poe said and reached to take hold of her hand, squeezing hold of it tightly as she looked to him. "If I was in his position then I would have done anything possible to keep you safe. I would never have treated you like that."

"And I know," Rosella said, reaching for his cheek and stroking it softly. "And that is why I love you, Poe. Please, never doubt that. Never doubt that I love and adore you…I just…there are times when I go back to the past and I don't know how to pull myself out of it. I don't know whether or not I made him the way he is and that…I made him this man…and that hurts me, Poe. That hurts me."

Poe shook his head, moving to wrap an arm over her shoulders. "He is his own person," Poe said in a soft voice. "He made his choices."

"Still doesn't stop me from thinking," Rosella said.

"No, but I can be here to help you. Just don't close yourself from me, Rose."

"Sorry," Rosella whispered and moved to kiss him chastely, still feeling a strange sense of guilt inside of her.

…

Poe sat down with Katrine, seeing that the little girl was sleepy all of a sudden. He had moved to pick her up as members of the Resistance discussed where they should go. Poe knew that he should be part of the conversation, but he had seen Katrine yawn loudly. Poe had looked around for Rosella, but he couldn't see her. He wondered where she had gotten to and so he stepped forwards and nudged Katrine in the shoulder as he bent down to her height.

"You tired, kid?" he asked and Katrine nodded. "Come on, I think there's a bed around here somewhere," Poe said. He picked hold of her and she wrapped her arms around his neck as he carried her to the small cot tucked in a corner. Letting her down, he watched her rest her head on the pillow. He pulled the blanket up to cover her as she looked to him.

"Rosella is sad," Katrine said in a soft voice. "She looks sad."

"I think she is just tired," Poe said.

"But…she…I don't understand," Katrine said in a small voice. "I thought that she was going to marry you, but she has a husband?"

Poe let his lips quirk upwards as he heard her speak. She was just a kid and she thought things were simple. Of course, she would soon find out that was not the case. Poe nodded his head.

"She does have a husband," Poe said, "but she is not with him anymore. She…one day she is going to marry me and I will be her husband. I love her and she loves me…but her husband doesn't love her…not anymore…"

"But he kissed her," Katrine said. "You don't kiss people who you don't love."

Poe looked shocked then, wondering what Katrine was saying before he shook his head. Rosella hadn't said anything about him kissing her. Looking to the little girl, Poe saw that she looked confused still, but he felt as though he was in a similar position to her. He moved to sweep her hair from her face and bend down to kiss her on the forehead.

"Everything will be alright," Poe said in a whisper.

He didn't know what else to say to her. Instead he let her sleep before moving off to try to find Rosella, wondering if Katrine had seen something that he should know about.

 _Six Years Ago_

 _Armitage returned to his quarter, exhausted after another day of working. It was late and he knew that he had been working hard. His body felt exhausted and drained. His limbs were heavy and he had the beginnings of a headache. He stepped into his quarters to find his wife lay on the black leather sofa, her head propped up by a pillow. She had a book by her side and her eyes were closed. She was sleeping soundly and Hux almost felt guilty waking her._

 _However, he suspected she was going to get neck ache laid on a small pillow. He bit down on his lips for a moment as he knelt down on the floor and rested a hand on her shoulder, shaking her softly. She startled and opened her eyes, her brows arching as she saw Armitage sat before. Her lips quirked upwards as she moved slowly, sitting up and moving a hand to her neck. She massaged the back of it as Armitage moved to his feet and then sat back down on the sofa next to her._

" _I was trying to stay awake," Rosella said in a small voice, "but I clearly failed."_

" _Clearly," he echoed. "I know that I am late and have missed dinner."_

" _I left you some on the side," Rosella said to him, yawning loudly as she stretched her arms over her head. "How was your day?"_

" _The same as usual," Armitage said to her. "Regardless, I have news. We are to leave the base in a few weeks. We are moving aboard the Finalizer. It should be ready and functional by then."_

" _Oh," Rosella said in a whisper._

" _I thought that you would be happy for a change of scenery?" Hux enquired from her and she shrugged her shoulders to him, chewing down on her lip as she moved to her feet, folding her arms over herself as she wandered towards the window and looked out, seeing the setting sun._

" _I…I suppose I will miss being outside," Rosella admitted to him. "It's nice having fresh air as opposed to being stuck on a ship."_

" _Perhaps," Armitage said to her, moving to stand next to her and looking outside. "However, we can always return here should we feel like it. We…I may be able to take time away from work once the plans are underway."_

" _Really?"_

" _Of course," he said with a nod. "Although I confess that I will be happy to escape my father."_

" _Has he been causing you problems?"_

" _Not problems," Armitage said with a shake of his head. "You know how he is. He thinks that I am too weak to be in command. He…he constantly belittles me, but he will soon see. He will soon understand that he is wrong."_

" _You know, you don't need to try and prove him wrong," Rosella said and turned to look up to her husband as he arched a brow, intrigued by what she had to say to him. "I mean…it doesn't matter what he thinks, does it? He has no power now. He has no say. You…from what you told me he had nothing except power and that went to his head."_

" _It did."_

" _Power isn't everything though, is it?" Rosella asked from him, taking hold of his hand as she moved to stand in front of him, looking him in the eye as he glanced back down to her, nervously gulping as he wondered what she was saying to him. "I mean, there are better things than being powerful."_

" _What are you trying to say?" Armitage enquired from his wife, moving a hand to stroke along her cheek, his thumb roaming along her cheekbone slowly as she shrugged._

" _Just that…maybe we could be happy somewhere else?" she finally said what she had been thinking for a while, knowing full well that it went against everything she had been taught by her father. "Have you ever thought about it?"_

" _About us being somewhere else?"_

" _About us just being us," Rosella said, squeezing hold of his hand, wondering if she could persuade him to come around to her way of thinking. She had seen glimmers of hope in the past few months that her husband was not the cold and calculating man she had first thought he was. "Think about it. We could go somewhere and just be us…how we are now…how we are when there is no one watching or expecting things of us."_

 _Armitage continued to stroke along her cheek, the motion steady and slow as he listened to her, hearing how her tone grew with excitement. She dragged him by the hand outside, walking a few steps ahead before turning to look to him as she walked backwards._

" _Think about it," she said to him. "We could read…we could be happy…there would be no one controlling us…your father, my father, the First Order, none of it would matter because there would just be us. We would just be together. It would be you and me, Armitage. Why do we need anyone else?"_

 _Closing her eyes, she felt a soft breeze as her husband stepped forwards towards her again. She kept hold of his hand as he looked down to her. He bent down and kissed her softly and slowly, the motion lingering as his hand remained underneath her chin. He pulled back after a second and said the words which crushed Rosella into pieces._

" _That can only be a dream, Rosella," he whispered to her and she felt a stab to her chest._

" _But why?" she wondered._

" _Because this is what I was trained to do," he whispered to her. "We can be happy, but we can be happy here. I shall see to it."_

 _He bent down to kiss her again and she remained stoic, letting him pull her closer as she wondered what more she could do to persuade him otherwise._

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


	38. Chapter 38

Poe knew that it wouldn't be difficult to find Rosella. She couldn't wander off far, but she could hide. Poe knew that she liked to do that. She was often reluctant to be among large groups. She preferred solitude. She preferred her own company. But that when she began thinking and Poe knew what that could do. He hated what she could do to herself when she let her thoughts run wild. She would go into a spiral of self-blame for everything that had happened. She put too much weight on her own shoulders. She thought that if she had managed to persuade her husband not to do what he had done that she could have stopped the First Order. But her husband was simply a pawn. The First Order would have someone else in charge if it was not him.

But Poe was upset. He was upset that she hadn't told him about her husband and what he had done. He knew that she would never initiate a kiss. He trusted her. He knew she was loyal, but he just wanted her to be honest. He wanted the truth. They were supposed to be in a relationship. Poe had told her that he wanted to marry her. He wanted to spend his entire life with her. He didn't think that they did secrets.

"Thought that I might find you down here," Poe said as he saw her sat on the floor, back perched against the wall in the storage room. He sat down besides her, bending his legs and letting his arms dangle over his kneecaps. "There's some food upstairs. It's not much, but it's sustenance."

"I'm fine," Rosella responded, looking to him with a small smile.

"You can't wallow down here, Rose," he said, moving a hand to brush her hair behind her shoulder. "Come on, you need something to eat."

"Honestly, I'm fine," she promised him, moving to peck his cheek.

"Still thinking about him?" Poe wondered and Rosella chuckled, tilting her head back and running her hands through her hair.

"He's in my head again," she admitted to him. "I keep thinking about what he said."

"So not about how he kissed you?" Poe wondered, the thought blurting out before he had a chance to think. He watched as Rosella's eyes widened and she looked to him. He nodded his head, letting his gaze drop down to the floor as he spoke. "Katrine told me. She wanted to know why he kissed you when we are together."

"Yeah…I…I should have told you," Rosella said with a nod of her head.

"Then why didn't you?" Poe wondered. "Did you think that I would be angry with you?"

"Of course not," she said with a roll of her eyes. "You know that I would never kiss him, not after everything that has happened. I have told you how I feel about him. Any love that I felt is just sadness now…sadness that I couldn't stop him from becoming the man he is today…stop him from doing the things that he has done."

"Still doesn't answer my question," Poe said, looking back to her as she took her turn to look away, chewing down on her cheek. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I don't…I just don't know why," Rosella admitted with a shrug of her shoulders. "I didn't think that it was important. He kissed me, but I didn't kiss him back. He…he's just confusing me, Poe, and I need to get my head around it, never mind talk about it, alright?"

Poe shrugged his shoulders. He suspected that answer was as good as he was going to get from her. He didn't think she entirely knew what to think when it came to Armitage Hux.

…

Armitage sat in his chambers, clutching some kind of glass of alcohol. He didn't know what he was drinking. All he knew was that it numbed the pain he felt in his chest. He thought of everything that was happening and he knew that he had to regain control. He had to be the one to take control back and away from Ren. He didn't like the young man and he had made no mistake in showing it. Yet a part of him did fear the power that Ren had. But he was careless. He was reckless. He wasn't destined to rule. He couldn't make calculating decisions. Armitage knew that he had to take back control of the First Order.

But he was only grateful that Ren was in such a foul mood that he hadn't questioned where Armitage had gone when he had been fighting Skywalker. He didn't know what had possessed him to go to her, but as soon as he had seen her he knew that he had to make sure she was safe. He still had feelings towards her and he knew that made him weak, but he didn't know how to stop them.

He couldn't let go of her. He didn't want to let go of her. He felt foolish for thinking it, but she was his wife. She was his wife and he wanted her back.

…

Sitting besides Poe, Rosella was grateful to be out of hyperspace and on solid land. They had travelled to the Outer Rim and landed on Lothal. Rosella remembered that Lothal was liberated from the Empire back in the day and now its economy was based on minerals. It was a thriving place and Rosella could see that judging from the clothes worn by the people there. They were made from expensive materials, the kind that Rosella used to wear during her time in the First Order when Armitage treated her.

Wandering through the stone streets with Poe, she kept her hand inside of his. Poe's fingers were laced through hers, holding them tightly as he swung their hands by their sides. They had been told to go off for a while, needing time to recover from what had just happened. Finn had informed Rosella that he was looking after Katrine with Rey because Poe wanted to take Rosella out to a cantina. Rosella had almost wondered why, but Poe had simply told her that he wanted time with her to be normal.

The cantina was too busy for Rosella's liking, so after one drink, she asked Poe if they could go for a walk. He had agreed, holding her hand again as the two of them wandered along the edge of the city, overlooking the shallow seas. Settling down on a rock, Rosella perched on it as Poe did the same.

"So…" Rosella said in a whisper. "You want to spend time alone?"

"Yeah," Poe admitted, wondering why he still felt slightly nervous around Rosella whenever he talked about his feelings. Poe wasn't a talker. He preferred to fight. When it came to fights, he knew what he was doing. He understood how to win fights. Talking was unknown to him. "I just…it's been a while since we've been alone and I thought that this might help. I know that you've been distracted recently."

"I think we all have been," Rosella said to him with a nod of her head. "We both know that it won't be long before the First Order come looking to destroy us once and for all."

"I know," Poe agreed with her. "With Ren now supposedly in charge it makes things worse. We both know how hot headed he is.'

Rosella nodded and then chewed down on her lip. "I admit, I did everything in my power to avoid him," Rosella said in a whisper. "He intimidated me…scared me…he was horrible. Armitage hates him too, but I think that Ren will be the downfall of the First Order. I think that he will destroy it."

Poe furrowed his brows and wrinkles formed on his forehead as he dared to wrap an arm around Rosella, holding her tightly to his side as she moved her arms around his waist, burrowing against him.

"How so?" Poe wondered from her, kissing the top of her head and then resting his chin on it.

"For all the reasons I just said," Rosella said. "Think about it, Poe. He is too hot headed for his own good. He's impulsive…impulsive decisions are often the worst kind of decisions."

"And also the most dangerous ones," Poe said.

"But wars are not won on impulse. Wars are won on planning and meticulous work," Rosella informed him. "Armitage, for all his faults, was more organised than anyone I had ever met. He understood what it meant to plan to make sure everything went as it should. The First Order is military, Poe. Precisions is how it wins battles…impulse isn't."

Poe's brow furrowed as he considered what she was saying to him. "So…you think they will be disorganised?"

"I think that they will be looking to attack as soon as possible," Rose said. "Ren will want to finish the job as soon as possible. He has the numbers and the power source. We're scattered and they know it. They know that they can squash us if they can find us."

"And you know that he is in charge now?" Poe asked.

"Armitage said that he was," Rosella said.

"We'll win…" Poe said in a confident voice. "Light always wins over darkness."

Rosella said nothing, not entirely certain if she agreed with his optimism. Instead she remained silent, her cheek resting against Poe's neck as she felt him run his hand up and down her arm, clearly content for the moment simply holding her. Rosella had to admit that she felt the same contentment too.

 _Six Years Ago_

 _Sitting up in bed, Rosella held the book she was reading in her grasp as Armitage kept hold of the plans he had been looking over. He adjusted in his position and then stretched his arms over his head. He yawned loudly and Rosella turned to look to him. Moving a hand to his arm, she saw him turn to look to her._

" _Why not go to sleep?" she wondered from him and he chuckled._

" _Sleep isn't a luxury I can afford right now," Armitage informed her._

" _I think it should be," Rosella said, moving a hand to his cheek to stroke along it. "You have hardly been sleeping, Armitage. You're looking pale and tired. I'm worried about you."_

 _Armitage took hold of the hand she had on his cheek. He kept hold of it as he went back to reading his plans and Rosella went back to looking over her book. She moved after a few moments, turning her bedside light out and putting her book down. Moving over slightly, she kissed him on the cheek._

" _Well, I am going to sleep," she said to him. "I think you should do the same."_

" _Or…" Armitage said and Rosella looked to him, wondering what he was thinking as he moved a hand to her cheek, letting his fingers trail down it as he moved his hand to her neck. "You know, we haven't been successful for a child, have we?"_

" _We haven't really tried recently," Rosella responded to him and he nodded. "You've been too busy."_

" _Then perhaps we can rectify that situation," Armitage said and Rosella let out a short laugh, flopping back onto the pillows as Armitage looked down to her, brow arched as he did so. "Something amusing?"_

" _Rectify the situation," she echoed his words. "Armitage, do you want a child? Do you really want a child?"_

" _Of course I want an heir."_

" _No," Rosella said to him, propping herself onto her elbow as she saw him move to lay on his back, her hand going to his chest. "I said a child, Armitage, not an heir."_

" _What is the difference?" Armitage asked._

" _Everything," Rosella said. "A child should not be a…what? A business transaction? Is that what you see it as? A necessity? No…we should have a child because we want one, Armitage, because we want to have a family together. I don't want to get pregnant if you're not sure it is what you want."_

" _Rosella," he whispered her name. "I…we need a child. We need to have a child and that is all there is to it. I promise you that the child will be well cared for."_

" _I do not doubt it," Rosella said, running her hand along his chest as he moved a hand to her elbow, playing with the strap to her nightgown. "But I want us to be better parents than ours ever were."_

" _I do not doubt that," Armitage said with a nod of his head. "I will not be like my father. I am nothing like that man."_

" _I know," she said._

" _But our child will need to be well behaved when it goes to the Academy and joins the Order," Armitage said, pulling the strap down her shoulder._

" _And if it does not want to go to the Academy?" she wondered and Armitage chuckled._

" _As if there would be an option," Armitage said. "The Hux name will be a legacy, Rosella, and our child will be the one to uphold that legacy."_

 _Rosella said nothing further as she felt him kiss along her neck. She kept silent as his hands made short work of her nightgown and she finally kissed him back, vowing never to let her child be brought by in the First Order if she became pregnant, no matter what Armitage did or said._

…

A/N: Do let me know what you think!


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